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Will you are the best judge of your situation, but the false friendship part is hard and if you feel you are not ready for it then I would pull back.
Thinking constantly about what the right thing to do with every interaction is exhausting 🙁Well I think the only thing you can do is have your own life as well, don’t sit around waiting for her.
I think the false friendship is just so she can see how you have changed, and thus become more attracted to you.
I would definitely keep things at a distance, she can continuously have 2 people vying for her attention. Your only job here is to be a great person, keep things on the surface, have a life and hopefully she will forget about the bad stuff and become more attracted to you.You need to cancel all those things or send the to someone else. We do not give gifts to people who leave us, we give gifts to people who are with us and love us.
When she gets those things, it will not have the desired effect you are hoping for and you will be disappointed. And it will also look needy on your part.I think you are doing the right thing by not jumping in and letting her pursue you a bit.
Seems like the false friendship would be the way to go. And just see where things go.Mema,
You are chasing too much 🙁 and all this is making you unbalanced, and you can feel that because you are saying I want him to want me.
I don’t think you should NC because you are in talking terms with him, but what you should do is pull back.
Keep track of who is inciting communication, at the very least it should be one and one, but it might be better if for every 2 times he initiates, you then initiate one time. But you have to patient when you first start this, it might take him a while to start initiating. You need to wait it out for him to start and when he does, you behave warm and receptive, not clingy and needy.
You need to give him room, lots of room to breathe and let him become attracted to you.
Both of you are right, you are not a couple and you are not his gf right now, let things happen be more carefree and easy going until things get more situated.
Hope this helps!I agree with ghost.
If it bothers you that she is friends with her ex, you need to wait until the relationship is on a more stable ground and then you need to bring it up to her. And the way you bring it up is – act depressed one day, wait for her to ask what’s wrong and then you tell her that it hurts you that she is still friends with her ex, but don’t tell her she can’t be friends with him, let her come up with that idea on her own.So why is it that you want him back? You need really think about that…
sometimes when we see that our ex was able to move on, we experience feelings of regret and that is normal, but is not necessarily a good reason to go back.Also you need to be careful about having sex with him, this will only cloud your judgement.
And just because you love someone does not mean you should be with them. Sometimes you can never stop loving them and that is okay, especially someone who you were with for such a long time.
I too was married for 13 years and it took me a long time to realize that I was never going to stop loving my ex, and had to make peace with it. But rationally I knew we could not be together, the relationship was very unhealthy and he could not make the changes he needed to make so we could be together.
Take care!Hi,
I just read your story.
I think if you want to get her back, you should not respond. By not responding it will make her think she lost you for good and when that happens, she will want you back. Wait until she makes contact a few more times, then respond.If you are done with her, then respond.
good luck!
