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He didn’t contact me since then. It’s been 10 days already. Tomorrow is his birthday, I think of just sending him a short “Happy birthday” message and that’s it. Sometimes I’m wondering if I did the right thing. Maybe if I wouldn’t have said those things to him then maybe we could still be friends and he might change his mind about us. But either way he knows how I feel and if he wants he can talk to me anytime.
Currently I’m working part time at the movie theater. I’m planning to continue studying Graphic Design at the University next year and get a degree.
I know. This are the hardest months that I’ve ever had. But in time you learn how strong you can be. I hope everything will work out for both of us! 🙂
Where are you from if I may ask?
Yeah lol it is weird. I think it sort of felt like he’s jealous or worried that I might be seeing someone. From his behavior I could see that he didn’t want to let me go, as friends at least. Like he’s stringing/ dragging my along or putting me on the side for now but still important to him to keep in touch with me. Because usually exes are not keeping in touch for long. I posted a new picture on facebook but he’s not “liking” any of my posts anymore. I guess I have to wait a little more and see how it goes.
Wow that’s great! I’m happy for you! 🙂
I know what you mean but I think you should go for it anyway. If it’s important to you then I think you shouldn’t miss an opportunity like this. Maybe try working part-time? or even once a week would help. I’ve just finished with my exams. I’ve been taking courses at the University for a year -Computer game design and development. And recently got a new job that I’m happy with. I’ve learned that there are so much great things in life and started to appreciate the small things in life. I still have my bad days but I’m trying to do my best 🙂@Gingerone I think you should keep playing it cool, take it slow and see where it goes. As ty10 said trust your gut and after a few meetings decide if it’s the time to bring this topic up. I know it seems confusing, but I think it looks promising. Even if she can’t meet up on specific day it doesn’t mean she doesn’t want to. Stay positive!
@Gingerone I’m almost done with my exams. It’s a bit hard sometimes focusing on them with all the things going on but I’m doing my best 🙂
Why do you think it could be out of friendship? You said you talked all night and even been intimate a bit. I don’t see any reason for her to do so when she’s not interested or has feelings for you.
It’s great that she’s willing to meet up again! I’m really happy for you! 🙂 I know you have a good feeling about this but anyway like we all said I think you should take it slow and don’t rush anything, because if it will be too much for her or too fast she may distance herself again. Keep yourself busy, play it cool, and just go with it for now.
So it’s about the same as mine. Almost 5 months now. I just didn’t believe that after that much time things could change. But I guess they can 🙂
I kind of feel like that “you are acting mysterious” might have been him being afraid you are seeing someone”.
Yeah he asked me that too. He said that it’s okay to tell him if I’m seeing someone and even asked me if I’m pregnant O_O I know he’s worried about me but it’s hard to say if he’s doing it because he’s jealous/afraid or because he’s just worried as a friend and that’s all. He didn’t contact me since then. I’m not going to contact him for a while and see how things go.
How are things on your side? Did you find a new job?
@Gingerone I agree with ty10 on this. Remember to take it slow from here.
Also just something to take notice of, I think you shouldn’t talk about stuff from the previous relationship for now, take it as a new and fresh relationship and have fun 🙂
And yes I think the next meeting should come from her. Even if you want to talk to her and tell her stuff try to play it cool for now and see how things go.If I may ask for how long were you two broken up?
@Gingerone I’m so happy for you! So all the signs she gave you were true. She really did miss you and has feelings for you. It almost doesn’t sound real lol! How are you going to take it from here?
@kaila I agree with you. He’s just stringing me along. 2 days after this conversation with him he called me again. He was in the middle of work that moment and took a short break to have this conversation with me. He apologized for the things he’s said and was curious to know why I sounded a bit sad back then. This time we had an honest talk. I told him that I still have feelings for him and if he changes his mind in the future then we can talk, but as for now I don’t think being friends is the right thing to do. He also said that I’m acting mysterious because I don’t tell him things but I told him straight forward that’s because we are not as close as we used to be. In the end of the conversation he said that I can tell him things and said that we’ll talk.
I felt like I’ve hurt his ego a bit. But at least now he knows for sure how I feel and won’t keep me in the middle anymore. Now it’s up to him to decide and that way he might figure out his true feelings and what’s important to him in his life.
@maya I’ve read some about your situation and I agree with kaila on this. I think NC is the way to go for now.@Gingerone I know this feeling, but you shouldn’t contact her for now. I know this because on my weak moments I’m thinking of doing it myself. Today I felt terrible, was really down because today we have a “White Night” so everyone are having fun and partying all night while I’m working late and going straight home from work. I tried asking my close friends but they all have exams next week so they’re busy studying. At first I felt bad and even thought of asking him to go because he mentioned he’s going to this but after a while I felt better and I’m glad I didn’t ask him.
I agree with Jburg32, right now she keeps you hanging on and you can’t know for sure what are her intentions. It’s really not healthy for us and as long as we don’t know I think we should focus on ourselves and place our thoughts about them on the side of our mind for now. I think you should wait for her to contact you first. You’ve already asked her to hangout so I think now it has to come from her. But if you really want to then maybe wait a few days and try asking her again.
I think the same. He wouldn’t invite you and talk to you casually if he were into her or thinking about a new relationship. Usually exes, even when friends, stop talking or become distanced from each other when any of them has a new relationship or seeing someone new.
It looks to me like maybe he wants to get things the way they were before. Maybe he’s clueless to why you are not talking to him and wants to solve this as well. If NC hasn’t done good then have an honest conversation with him about these things. Lately I did the same with my ex, I didn’t plan to do it at first but I noticed that nothing comes out of us being friends, so I told him straight forward that we shouldn’t remain friends. I’m not sure if I did the right thing but at least I won’t be in the middle and keep wondering if things he does actually mean something. That way he knows how I feel and contacts me if he changes his mind. I think you have nothing to lose, as you said if he’s not interested then you can move on. If he does then you can work on your relationship together.
Your counselor has a point. I didn’t think of it this way but maybe he really did expecting to get your attention and now he feels like it didn’t work out the way he expected it to be and might give up. You know what’s best for you, and if you feel like talking with him about it is the right thing then do it. At least you will be able to see things in clearer way and will get an honest answer. Maybe try to do it one step at a time, first talk to him and see how he responds, then decide when is the right time talking to him about it. If it as you say and he started acting like this just after your friend came then I believe he will be willing to talk to you and explain things to make things better between you two.
I agree. We should continue with our life and with improving ourselves.
You did well! If she wants to meet up she will contact you, now I think it has to come from her. You are working on yourself and that’s great! Keep doing what you’re doing and hopefully everything will work out for you! 🙂As for me I’ve just got a new job, going to focus on that and my last exams 🙂
I don’t know how to go with my situation, I think of going back to NC and see if he contacts me. I already said all I had to say, and now he knows for sure that I have feelings for him and things can’t remain the way they were. So I guess it’s up to him.@Gingerone To answer your previous question, I feel like I’m trapped in an infinite loop.
He called me this morning. He took a short break from work to do that.
He explained himself about the things he said. Said that I misunderstood and apologized if I got hurt because of this.Last time we talked I sounded a bit sad, so he asked me if something happened back then. I told him that I don’t want to talk about it, and he kept asking about it.
I don’t know how he got to this but he said it’s fine to tell him if I’m seeing someone, and even asked me if I got pregnant(LOL) I told him that nothing really happened but explained him that I can’t talk to him about everything because we are not as close as we used to be.
I don’t know if it was right but I told him that I still have feelings for him, and that there’s really no point in being friends like this because we might get hurt, so he said it was hard for him at first as well.
I told him that if he’ll change his mind in the future then we can keep in touch but I don’t think it is the right thing to do right now. He said he understand and that he’s supposed to get back to work so we’ll talk, then mentioned that I can talk to him about things if I want to.
I can tell he’s worried about me. But it looks like he made up his mind, on the other hand he keeps coming back everytime. So I’m not sure what to think of this.
