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I know how you feel, it’s so hard waiting around like that when he’s not responding, but I think you should wait a few more days, If he’s willing to meet that’s a good sign so I say wait a bit more for him to respond.
I’m so happy for you!! 🙂
He could have said something else but chose to say that he loves you!
This is definitely a good sign, and yes you should take it slow for now.
Did he say anything else?That is exactly the reason why I sent my ex the letter after 14 days of NC and didn’t wait more, because I realized things that I haven’t thought about before, about my behavior and how I made him feel during our relationship, so I woke up and thought that I must send him a letter explaining how I feel. In the letter I apologized for hurting him and explained it was wrong, told him that I respect his decision, told him how much I appreciate him, and how much the relationship meant for me, but I didn’t specifically write things about our fights because I wanted the letter to be light hearted, do you think it’s okay? and if I may ask, what did you write him?
He received my letter yesterday, but haven’t called or anything, yesterday I shared on my facebook a romantic song (I suppose he doesn’t know that song) and he was the first person to “like” it! (that was after he stopped liking things on my facebook) It made me happy for a bit, also during our relationship we always shared with each other romantic songs and every song reminded us of a time we spent together, I know that maybe i’m exaggerating it but it gives me hope.
@tg7188:
Thanks, you too! I know how you feel, I don’t sleep well, have nightmares, meeting with my friends but still feel lonely somtimes, I’ve lost 2kg in 2 weeks!
@kaila:
Thanks for the advice.
I’m not taking care of my health that’s why I decided that it’s not worth it anymore.
I understand that he needs some time but I already started the NC and then we arranged a meeting and things were going well as friends and now I started the NC again because I felt that I didn’t give him enough time, I know that I hurt his feelings so I wanted to write him a letter to apologize and tell him how much I appreciated all the things he’s done for me, it’s mostly so I can be at peace with myself and show him how I felt.Not so much, actually I think things are getting worse.
Before I started the NC rule when I initiated a conversation with him he always called me back or texted me, there was even one time he texted me to check how i’m doing.
A few days ago I accidentally called him but he didn’t call me back, and he stopped liking stuff on my facebook, he told me before that it’s important for him to stay in touch and told me to call him if I need anything or if I just want to talk.I don’t know anymore what all of this means, did he said that because he felt bad for leaving me or did he really want to stay friends because i’m still important to him?
I decided to wait a few more days so it will be 2 weeks of NC and then send him a letter, whatever happens I accepted the possibility that we might never get back together.
I know that it’s really hard and you couldn’t even imagine that he would say those things to you but I believe his feelings right now come from anger and this is not how he truly feels about you, he’s not thinking straight right now and that’s why you should give him some time to calm down and think about his real feelings for you, that’s also why I think the NC rule is so important, when I met my ex about a week ago I thought that enough time has passed and that he misses me but I realized that I didn’t actually give him enough time to be alone and experience his life without me for a while, that’s why I think you should give him some time alone, it’s also better than getting hurt again and again after he’s rejecting you and hurting you like that, I know it’s really hard and painful but we have to wait and be patience for a while and let them calm down :/
Today I went shopping with my mother and EVERYTHING I looked at reminded me of him, It was so hard, that moment I just wanted to call him but I controlled myself and I felt better not doing it, that way you’re proving to yourself and showing him that you don’t need him to be happy.
The first few times we talked on the phone after the break up my ex was also really cold and said things that really hurt my feelings, he said that I should find someone new and I said that a couple should stay together not just in the good times but also in the bad times and he told me to find someone that will stay with me in the bad times, and also that his love for me is not the same anymore.
he acted to you like that because he’s angry at you and it means he still has feelings for you, I think that showing anger is better than apathy because it means he cares.
I agree with you! If you truly love someone a fight shouldn’t end the relationship like that, some guys are really sensitive when it comes to this and can be very stubborn after a fight, or maybe there’s more to this that we’re missing? I know for sure how much he loved me and cared for me and yes fights can destroy relationship over time but if most of the time you were happy together and you could feel his feelings for you then it shouldn’t end the relationship like that.
I guess that some guys just need some more time with themselves to understand their feelings and think about the situation.
Thanks! You’re right I guess it’s a good sign if he’s willing to meet me in person 🙂
Also when I called or texted him he always answered back, I know that I hurt his feelings and he needs his time alone for now, but it’s so hard thinking that 2 weeks before that everything seemed great between us, I apologized for everything I did and told him that I made a mistake (our fights mostly happened because of my insecurities and jealousy) so I’m afraid that he might give up on us.I agree with tami, keep up the NC rule for more than 30 days and even if he said those things I’m sure he’s thinking about you, In my situation my ex also seemed cold and said things that really hurt my feelings, and everything was great 2 weeks earlier and I thought “how can he change his feelings so fast? everything seemed so great between us, I know it’s really hard but wait a while and work on yourself you have nothing to lose.
This is very similar to my story!
We met on a dating site and we’ve been together for 1.4 years, he broke up with me on the phone and told me that he wants us to stay friends and that I should meet someone new, he also said some hurting things but I suppose that things came from anger and this is not how he truly feels.
I say start the NC rule again and see how things going, I also broke the NC rule and rushed things but It didn’t change how he feels, you both need some time and space to heal for now, don’t lose hope!
