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Hi Steve,
It was a long time that I hadn’t heard anything from you and this was by chance. Only in 10 days is the anniversary of our first date and all the festivals we attended. Just like you, some part of me want to scream, “WHY?!”
I was thinking maybe we can start a new conversation with old friends like you, a.z., Edward, Daniel (is he still active?), Rihanna, Festival David, etc. to have an update.
My Vodka is over. Probably I should go to Liquor Barn tonight. It keeps me strong. Recently, I drink and watch movies (and don’t read all stories here) lately. I should say that most of my parts have accepted the fact that it’s over!
Steve, I still believe that you have a better chance. Maybe your round 2 should focus on 60th day.
qandrew,
Last night Steve made a comment somewhere saying that those who got their ex back are now busy doing sex. So don’t expect them to be active here to share their stories.
I have been here for a while and I have read comments on people getting going on dates with their ex again.
Maybe I also have a successful story of my kind. I did not get back my ex after 3 months but I have shed about 20 kgs (45 lbs) and I am really fit now. Plus I don’t care about my ex which is the best thing that should happen to someone after being dumped. Today, I met a girl and asked to have a walk with me in a park. We were together for 3 hours and I was thinking if she was good to start a new relationship or not. This NC made a strong man! I was a needy/clingy guy 3 months ago. I wrote her maybe 20 emails in 7 days after the breakup starting from criticizing her for being mean to bombarding her with apologies for criticizing. And here I am!
By the way, we exchanged some emails last week. When she did not reply my last email, I did not contact her further.
Joe,
That’s fine! Don’t panic. I believe there are thousands of people with name Joe. So maybe a part of her is be confused about it. I believe she also looked back at your profile right? Did you have the same surname? Lets see the positive side! Now she as a question to ask you!
Don’t call her, don’t contact her, don’t do anything. Just continue your NC. What is done is done. I also know professional social networks that inform who viewed whose profile. For this reason, I don’t use them to see what my ex is doing lately! By the way, that professional social network that I know does not talk about the surname!
Yonni,
I believe him stalking you is a sign that he cares about you. From what you said, I got a feeling that he wants to be with you. Maybe he is trying his best to not act needy/clingy. I believe you have chances. Just be cool about it. Maybe you panic because you want to run things faster.
Best of luck Yonni!
Hi Steve,
This last paragraph made me laugh! You are right! The successful ladies and gentlemen are now too busy in sex to write us if they started with the letter or text.
I also appreciate the fact that your round to is aiming to move on. We are in the same direction.
I wish you the best in all directions!
Joe,
In January she went to OR, WA, CA (we live Eastern zone). In her email she said that its true that she will probably move to OR. I have a new hypothesis lately. She met her ex bf and other friends in January. They had a great influence on her. Our fights started since January and she was the one who started them all. She wanted to make me angry/frustrated so that I give up the relationship. To support my hypothesis; she was supposed to graduate in December or next May. She had a new plan for her life since January which did not include me.
No! I did not meet her. In fact, I don’t care much about meeting her. It’s true that she dumped me but I am much better looking, more successful, etc. than her.
You are in the right tract. I am also chasing other girls. I had a date today. That will help you to move on much faster. Maybe this is one of the reasons that I am playing it cool.
I am sure non of those girls will come to your life for long but it a good way to get over your ex. I can say that I am addicted to ask for numbers lately. I don’t feel bad even if they reject. I feel good that I start a conversation in which I ask for a number. Do it man!
IA,
My breakup was serious and I was at Death Door. I sent a handwritten letter on 35th day, no answer. I sent a text on about 40th day yet no answers. I sent a letter described in Relationship Rewind, on 85th day. She replied it with a lot of information in it; it wasn’t just a lousy reply. However, she did not reply my third email. I should contact her in 2 weeks after her last reply with a text message.
Joe,
You have been acting needy for a long time. Just like me, your ex probably has an image of a needy person in her mind.
I don’t know what’s happening but about 3 months ago there used to be 3-4 posts everyday so I would read the stories and Kevin’s comments. I remember that Kevin did not “recommend” apologizing soon after the breakup in some of this comments. Perhaps that looks needy but polite with our understanding.
I truly understand what you say because I also went to her house to say sorry to her.
In Relationship rewind, it is suggested to do NC of 2-3 months when you are at Death Door stage. I have read this section maybe 3 times because it was meant for me. Again, don’t contact her with her new number. Email her.
Yeah, I believe its some sort of addiction.
Joe,
I finally found a story that resembled the last 3 months of my relationship. The last day I met my ex (apart from random coincidences during NC) was the day I went to her apartment to apologize to her. Just like you she had made a doormat out of me and walked over me even in the presence of others. On the day I went to her house to apologize, she blocked me on Facebook. I found that it was a mistake to apologize. Moreover, on that day she told me to get out of her life forever!
I did NC for about 85 days and wrote her an email similar to the one on Relationship Rewind meant for people at Death Door. It worked and she replied to me. However, I realized that her angry tone is somewhat there. I find good changes but I believe it will take me a lot of energy to continue that relationship. Its extremely hard to be treated as a gentleman when someone is used to treat you like a doormat.
I recommend you to do NC for 2-3 months. Just like what I did. Make a lot of changes in your life. Even go on some dates. I believe there are chances for you!
I was just like you about 3 months ago! I truly understand you Joe.
Be free to update us!
Thanks Edward for the insight!
I also believe that this breakup helped me learn and gain a lot of things. It’s strange but sometimes mind goes out of control and when this happens, a relationship becomes a mess.
I admire you on your improvement.
Your breakup was polite and that’s a good point. She won’t forget you over a night. Will you forget her overnight? The bad feelings from arguments usually fade much faster. Maybe in a month or in 2,3 or 4 months. However, as those bad feelings fade, good feelings of “old good days” replace them! It’s the general trend!
This NC is primarily for you; to become strong and not get involved in (cheap) agreements. It is also true for her, especially in your case.
If she contact you, tell her politely that you both still need time and space to regain your composure. The stronger you act, the more attractive it will be.
Jes,
My ex-girlfriend and I had terrible breakup. Not only did unfriend me on Facebook but also blocked me. She also told me that she does not want to see me in her life again. I came to this site simply to give some hopes to myself and see if there are slightest chances! Also, I know her and I when she says something, she really means it! Guess what!She replied to my email on 85th day. We exchanged some emails! If I work on her, I think there I might get in touch with her in a month! I have come to a conclusion that this plan works somewhat!
I believe it will help you eventually increase your chances. Follow the plan and stay cool!
Best of luck!
Its okay! I believe not seeing him on FB will help you do this NC much easier. Don’t forget the fact that he broke up with you in the first place and started dating someone else. Probably he is playing some sort of mind games with you to win the “post breakup fight”. If you play really cool about it, it will backfire on him.
Yeah! Probably its a rebound relationship. Both of them broke up recently and there are chances that they start missing their ex and move back to their previous relationships.
mhyy,
You should apply not contact. Ideally, you should not reply to him. It’s not really impolite compared to breaking up with you and hurting your emotions. If he insisted, tell him that you need time and space to sort out things and deal with the breakup, and this is exactly why you are doing NC.
