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DanMurphy,
I think it’s an emotional stage for her as well. She seems quite confused so try not to over analyse her words otherwise you’ll go insane.
One reason is that she might feel quite pressured from you and that’s why she uses these hurtful words. Give her time.
I mean I told my ex at the beginning of our breakup that I’ll wait for him and it is something I soooo regret. I realised I was putting so much pressure on him. And it wasn’t fair.
Just focus on you no matter how hard that is…L.A
I can so relate to your story (well at some parts). Today it’s been a tough day for me simply because it’s just one of these days.And even though it’s my 43 day of NC, today it feels like day 1.
I must say I am very proud of you and I admire you for being that confident and decisive. Clearly you successfully passed the last stage. But there are always some moments of weakness. You are only human and you had deep feelings for your ex. But you have made a remarkable progress.
The fact that our exes moved on (or at least that’s what it looks like) hurts deeply. Even if it’s a rebound relationship. Who cares? Still it’s painful. I recently found myself hating him for this and feel very angry.
I really hope someday to become that strong as you. Keep up! And thanks for sharing!SuzyLou,
I am sure there is nothing you should worry about. There is a lot of history between you two. Just focus on yourself and have patience. I know you can do it!
DanMurphy,
I am also following 90 days NC. Do not ask anyone about her! And no you shouldn’t let your mom do such a thing. So basically through these 90 days we need to focus on us and just us!Keep a distance from your ex. It is hard cause you are just at the beginning. But tt will get better, I promise 🙂
SuzyLu,
I am facing this ‘rebound’ thing as well.But the more I think about this other girl and my ex, the more affects my mental health. So don’t focus on that (I am trying that as well). If you two had a serious type of relationship (and I am sure you did) there is no way she ‘ll move on that fast (I am also saying this to myself – hope it’s true)…….
SuzyLou,
I know it is hard believe me. To make you feel any better I am in my 42 day of NC. He hasn’t contacted me and at times it can be so difficult.
Distance will help both of you and you’ll become stronger. If you rush things you will end up ruining your relationship. Trust me.Suzylou,
Don’t look at this in such a negative way. She cares about you. But you should continue NC without of course letting her know. How long did your last NC last?
Giver her the chance to miss you and see how her life is without you in it. This takes time though. And lot of patience. 😉DanMurphy,.
For the time being you focus on your self and follow the NC plan. You don’t know how things will work out in a couple of months. Have patience! Everyone is here for you..
DanMurphy,
It’s way too soon to make assumptions. The only thing you can do now is to apply NC. I suggest for more than a month. Do not contact her pls!You are too emotional and you can’t think straight. I know cause I’ve been there. Trust me, things will be better day by day.
L.A,
Don’t apologise. You have no idea how much you’r helping me here. Thank you for being that concise :)))
L.A,
Your advice is indeed valuable. My ex is not the stubborn type. I feel that if he wants to contact me, he will ..(I hope)
But if you send a text instead of a letter you cannot possibly say all these things. It has to be casual right?
Unfortunately there is no way I can find out if he still sees that person or not.
Well I have time till then.
Thank you so much L.A!!L.A
Frankly I don’t know if I should send the letter. Yes he is worth it. But I need him to make the first step. Especially when I have put all this effort at the beginning of our breakup (in a very clumsy and sometimes desperate way). I have a long road though. I have two more months of NC. I may change my mind till then.
Remind me pls, did she respond to your letter and how?
L.A,
I must say I am very proud of you. Good for you! I wish I could be that strong. I am in my 40 day of NC and no way I feel that way. But definitely I am better than day 1 🙂
The part where your ex is involved with someone is the most excruciating one. My ex is seeing someone else too and even though I know it’s not a relationship, it still hurts. But I am trying not to focus on that at all!
Actually I totally agree on the fact that you don’t want your next girlfriend to be a rebound. That shows maturity. NC did work for you after all. Keep up!Daniel,
That is exactly it.
I think that in order for them to come back we really need to let go. For real. And it takes time. No way you can have a serious reconciliation after only a couple of weeks or 2 months.
