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I’ve been totally addicted to an ex maybe 10 yrs ago now. It took years to get over him. The mistake is that you need to understand that you’re wasting happiness on chasing him. I made the mistake too, the guy I couldn’t let go of really was not that attractive, interesting or really my type. I let my feelings hang on to him though and I let thoes feelings get in the way of finding someone else.
I now find myself alone again and in love, I can only give it so much time for a reconciliation before I have to work hard on letting go. It won’t be easy but it can be done.
If I’m not supposed to be with my ex who I love I will give myself a year or so before I need to look for someone else. I can’t hang on in there for years and waste time and happiness on someone who doesn’t want to be with me, no matter how good things where when we were together. It’s heartbreaking but it’s part of life and you never know who is round the corner and a whole new set of memories to be made.Stay strong, the more NC you do the stronger you will feel.
I’m on day 7 NC with not a peep from him. I have times where I’m desperate to email him, you’ve no idea. Something inside me stops me and then I feel good that I’ve over come the urge. If I make contact I will have wasted all that time. 30days at the end of the day is not a long time. I’ve done one week, just 3 more to go.
If I know my ex, he probably is thinking about me a lot, I don’t know in what way though obviously. He’s probably looking at his phone anticipating a message but it never comes. That will lead to curiosity and one day that will over come and he will make contact….. I hope!I’m on day 6 of NC. I really have to stick with it as my ex is angry with me beyond belief. The only way that anger will go is if I disappear, so reality hits him and that he suddenly realises he misses me. We were together 8 years!
I’ve nothing to lose by doing NC but everything to lose if I contact him!Keep strong guys!
Not sure I could be as strong as you knowing there was someone else on the scene.
Of course she hooked up with this guy. It takes the pain away from the real issue. If she jumped from one guy to another then she is doing it because it’s the easier option rather than being able to stand emotionally alone.For the long term, do you really want to put yourself in a situation where you’re with someone who doesn’t know what they want and grass is greener and all that. She needs time out, like her mother has said.
Maybe look at NC as a time out for you? For you to work out exactly what you want. I know you want her back but the drain of knowing she doesn’t know what she wants must be very stressful.
I’m stressed over my ex. One min I think he will be back the next I think he really has had enough. It would be great to get to that point where I don’t think about it or mind what happens. My case is easier as he just doesn’t want to talk or be with me.
For you, she doesn’t want to let you go completely. Is that fair she has her cake and eat it? What’s the worst could happen with her and this bloke in 30 days? He sounds like an awful guy and really, how long is the Mr Nice guy going to keep tagging her along before he sees someone he likes better?
Belle
Yes sounds like a rebound she’s getting herself in. 9 years is pretty drastic to throw away. I’m in that situation myself, just gutted all thoes years of ups and downs thrown away. I love him still after 8 years so that’s saying something. My ex is having some kind of mid life crisis and I’m not sure which way it will go. I’m doing NC and going stir crazy but it’s the only thing I can do to hopefully bring him round again.
Sometimes it’s times like this that we reevaluate life and how we are, behave and expectations. It’s like a grounding, we need to learn of what we’ve done to push someone away.
Yes false friendship is gaining her trust in you. She’s opening up to you and listening to what you say.
If her new fella found out she said that she loved you, I know myself it would not sit comfortably with me. Def rebound going on.
She sounds quite needy if she’s going from one guy to another. You have 9 yrs between you, she’s not going to suddenly find a replacement so quick.You’ve made your feelings known to her, i would go into NC. Remember she’s rebounding. Good luck
