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No I think your right.. I’ll wait until Monday!
I was literally just going to say that i have his stuff and give him the option of him getting it from me and meeting up to see each other or that I will give it to his mum! That way if he wants to see me he can but if he doesn’t or he’s not ready he doesn’t feel im pushing it. I was also going to say I hope he enjoyed his weekend as I know what he has planned and he’s been looking forward to it! Or do you think that looks too stalkerish? How familiar should I be when we haven’t spoken in what will be 5 weeks?But it shouldn’t matter why or what he’s doing in the afternoon? He’s giving you his morning! Just accept he’s given you some of his time and be thankful for it! Don’t take it for granted..
It’s fine if you don’t wanna give it any more time, just wait for what you’ve got organised and go from there.. This is no miracle solution or overnight cure!
How far into NC are you? Sorry if you’ve already told me, I lose track..
I definitely think if it’s been enough time then a letter won’t harm.. Just make sure it’s not obviously trying to get you back together 🙂 im sure you know that already..
You’ll have to let me know when you send it and what happens! I can’t decide whether to text mine tomorrow before I sort his stuff out on Saturday or on Monday after iv sorted it! I know he has plans with friends this weekend so don’t want to do it then! Do you think I should do Monday or tomorrow?
@kaila There are a few things you need to remember here!
1. He isn’t your boyfriend right now, so doesn’t have to answer to you regarding his whereabouts in the afternoon. Asking him makes it looks like you are still insecure, which you’ve told him your not.
2. Him giving you any of his time is a bonus to many cases I have seen on this site. Don’t read too much into it.
3. Morning, afternoon and evening are roughly the same length of time, depending on what time you wake and sleep. He’s actually giving you the best one as its the only one that runs into the rest of the day!
4. You are predicting his thoughts and actions, and predictions are all they are! Only he knows why or what he’s doing! Just let it play out and see what happens..Seriously, you have a great chance at making this work, you need to be the positive and secure person that your making yourself out to be! If your not that person yet then you should still be doing NC until you are, that’s the point.
Again sorry if I’m blunt but it’s all true and you need to hear it to make this work x
Have you thought that maybe he said morning so that you’ve got more of the day together if it over runs? Or that he doesnt want to waste a second of the day?
I think you are being way too hard on him and yourself and you need to try and be a little more optimistic as it is only stressing you out.. The negative feelings are all in your head.You are so lucky that he is seeing you and wanting to make plans with you, dont jump in with the negativity and insecurities, remember, your trying to show him you’ve changed.
Try not to push him away! I know your excited to see him, but its early days! Would you hassle a friend if they planned something for the morning? If not, then don’t him. As currently, depsite your hopes for the future, that is what you are.
Sorry if you feel im being blunt, i just think youve got a good thing going and id hate for you to lose that oppurtunity! x
I thought about the letter a lot! But i’m not sure how he’d take it..
Yes im nervous but getting antsy about texting him, i think i need to do it, but i do worry for my feelings haha!
I’ll be 30 days tomorrow! :S I can’t work out if I’m ready or not.. I think I am but im nervous! How ridiculous is that?
He’s always been quite reserved with his emotions anyway! Which was why I was suprised that he cried when he said his goodbyes, I’d only seen it once before in the whole 6 years and it was when he told me he loved me for the first time (he’d had a few drinks too). So I don’t even know what that means?Thanks @annakis
So it went okay! I got a little upset as his cousin was there who is 6 and she gave me flowers and a kiss and hug and it made me cry! Just a little overwhelming..
His mum said I look really good, that it was the first thing she noticed! 🙂 always a positive!
hes kept his cards very close to his chest with her too so she said she couldn’t give me any indication how he’s feeling but that she thinks I should text him to open the communication again.. She said she just doesn’t have a clue what will happen either but that I am doing all the right things.. As positive as it could be I guess?
I think I’m gonna be strong and act fine (I am really), but she will know I miss him, were close so she will be able to tell!
To be honest im not sure he’ll have opened up to her much as he finds she tried to control his life.. But I am hoping she’ll have something new for me! Who knows! I’m say waiting now so I will keep you updated xAnybody any advice? We’re meeting in 8 hours.
Colleagues at work this morning have told me i shouldn’t even be going, that it should be a clean break and i should leave it.. but they don’t know my secret battle to win him back!
So confused!
Yes it does suck! I wish someone would tell me how he actually is! He’s in the forces so he’s away a lot of the time and I don’t know any of his friends from there close enough to ask them without them thinking I’m being a stalker!
@heypeezer wow that really is awful! Well done you for going travelling anyway, it will have been a hard decision to make but definitely the right one! Did she also to travelling alone?
You are right about friends too, I feel like a broken record and all I want is them to tell me he’s coming back which they won’t, quite rightly coz they don’t know! This site has been really amazing for me in the last couple of days.. Even just writing all my feelings down makes a small difference! Do feel you can do the same 🙂 it’s a good support network for sure! xBut she didn’t stay with him.. That speaks volumes! Try not to worry too much..
We can’t change what is going to happen, we can only set us up in the best possible light to let it 🙂
