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@CCL994 Sorry, but I think you should disengage from her completely! It’s obvious she doesn’t love you and she also has emotional issues with depression and laziness. Since the house is in her name, you can move out and she will then be responsible for everything related to the house.. Move out to your own apartment and get a male roommate to help with the expenses! Good luck and take care:)
As time goes by you’ll come to understand what is in your best interest and who might be a suitable for a good relationship.. How’s the business and did you get your driver license yet? Glad you found your own apartment:) Take good care..
@saintmich82 Wow! What a great story and I’m glad for your happy ending:) Remember to always be kind to each other and respectful too. Think before you speak and don’t ever say anything you might later regret.. Good luck and best wishes:)
@goosetwenty – The way you’ve been treating your ex is as if you’re pretending not to love her! Why do you think you’ve been doing that? If you’re certain that you don’t want to be with your wife, you should get a divorce! I don’t understand and neither does your ex.. I’m sure she feels like she’s being treated as an “option” and not a priority in your life. Most like she hasn’t “fallen” for someone new in just 3 weeks, but the longer you procrastinate about getting a divorce, the more likely she will give up on you and find someone else with no “entanglements” such as you have which would make a relationship more enjoyable + satisfying!
I don’t know if you have young children with your wife and maybe you’re therefore not wanting to get a divorce, but 2 people who aren’t in love and dating others is NOT a good example for children! You need to make a decision and follow through with it..
@soupcat I think you invited her for New Year’s Eve because you knew you could get sex from her and you did. Her not knowing anyone in the city or being alone for the holiday is NOT a good reason for inviting a toxic situation back into your life! She is correct.. she doesn’t deserve to be treated like a sex toy. It’s as if you’re leading her on and maybe she keeps reaching out because she thinks you will start caring more. Last week you told her you can’t see each other anymore so now you have to be strong/firm about that and not see her again under any circumstances!!
Get some self control and stop stalking your ex. I know it’s hard to let go because of the years you spent together, but you also said it was a toxic relationship, so why continue to torture yourself with random thoughts and stalking?? What possible good can come of it?
You say you’ve gone out with dozens of girls.. In my opinion, I don’t think you’re in the proper frame of mind to date!! First you need to get rid of your obsession with your ex and start seeing other women as individuals, not sex object. It seems you’re a playboy serial dater type. Get control of your emotions and place your focus more on your career before you start dating again!! If that means no dating for several months, so be it. Then start dating slowly (one at a time) and take some time to assess the situation as to whether you would be a good match.
Congratulations on your comics budding success and Motion Design business:) I pray you continue to do well with your endeavors!!
Glad you have a good roommate:) You say he’s in quarantine, so I guess that means he tested positive for covid. Are you taking precaution? It’s nice you helped him find a nice girlfriend too..
Early Happy Birthday wishes for your upcoming birthday on Friday! When you say “Hers is one month after that” .. are you referring to the ex you’ve been stalking?
You have to stop talking to people about your relationship woes!! When you talk about them over & over, most people will get exhausted/frustrated. Talking with the therapist is the proper time to express anything that’s bothering you. And this forum of course..
Glad you saved enough money to hire a good therapist:) And hope you’ll be able to get a driver’s license and a good car too:)
@soupcat How’s it going??
@Gregoryfey88 How’s it going??
@soupcat I’m assuming the girl your broke off with is the one your dated after your ex and went to Italy with.. (?). Talking excessively about troubles with your ex to anyone can be exhausting and depressing for most people listening to you. Therefore, I suggest you keep it to a minimum. You’re not hiding your sadness if you say things that are more positive/upbeat because that’s part of who you are – you have a joyful/grateful side too, right? Grateful for blessings in your life that have nothing to do with girls. I’m not sure if you feel badly for the way your treated your ex, the other girl, or maybe both! Try your best not to stalk Spotify or other social media. And I think you have a good plan for the remainder of the year to focus on yourself!
I suggest you NOT date just to get sex, but date someone a few times and evaluate whether that person is a good match and mentally stable before you go into a relationship.. You did treat your ex badly at times, but you attributed it to stress with your job. You must learn to separate work from other parts of your life and people!! It seems your ex is a nice person, but maybe with some psychological problems that need working through.. over time maybe all will be better with you and her, but since she’s so far away, it might be best to get yourself together mentally and then start dating in 2022.
Actually, since your ex reached out to you after 6 months of no contact, maybe you could get in touch with her after the holidays and ask her all the questions you wanted to recently. And at that time, if you think she hasn’t made any progress in her confused thinking patterns, then block her and move on for good.
I’m so sorry all this has happened to you! I pray for the best outcome for you whatever that might be!
PS: How is your career going??
@Gregoryfey88 Sounds like you came on too strong from the beginning and even though she did too, as a man, you should have shown more constraint in slowing things down to a sensible pace! Apparently she was overwhelmed by the situation. I know you said her fiance cheated, but both of you being 32 years of age, I’m wondering if either of you have children or maybe divorced from a previous marriage??
Who’s idea was it to send voice note?? That can be stressful too as some people prefer texts or phone calls. Too much of any types of communication can also seem too intrusive!! And late night phone calls might not be appropriate if one needs to get up early for work..
Don’t stalk her social media and back off like you said you would do!! You also need to put things in perspective. This was a very short “relationship” and yet it turned difficult quickly. That’s a red flag! Try your best to get on with your life and let time pass.. she may or may not change her mind, but don’t obsess about it.
@soupcat OMG! You jump from one toxic relationship to another.. You have to stop!! And quit talking about your ex with your friends as I’m sure they are sick and tired of it and that’s no way to treat them. Is this the way you want to waste your time and life by agonizing over someone who doesn’t honestly care about you anymore? Stop torturing yourself by checking her social media and looking at yours for “signs” that mean nothing. Take it day by day and before you know it, this terrible “habit” will fade away and you can spend your time doing productive things:)
You definitely need counseling by a professional! Please seek out the help you so desperately need!
I know this advice seems tough, but you have to muster up the strength you need to do what you know in your heart to be the right thing for your own mental health and well-being in the long run.. Cut all contact with both girls.. And when you’re in a good state of mind, start dating, but watch out for red flags early on and thereby avoid the heartache and drama that you’re been experiencing.
@Shortstreet You didn’t give any info regarding how long you were a “couple”, how long you lived together, when you broke up or why, but keep your word and don’t pay any bills after Nov 1st. Surely she can find another place to live such as with family or a friend for reduced rent etc..
@Jade Samson He should have told you why he decided to break up with you! Whatever the reason, try to examine your own short comings and make the necessary improvements.
You should NOT ask him to be your boyfriend again. If you get the chance to start again as friends, slowly build up from there. But if not, try your best to move on and consider dating others..
@Bolond Anything new??
