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Hi Robot
Have you got the car yet? Any new stories to tell?
My life will be pretty quiet for the next few weeks or so. I busted my knee up while rock climbing a couple of nights ago. I am off work at the moment and need crutches to get around. Guess I wont be going out much at all for the next few weeks. On a positive, I have used the time by going on an online dating site and I messaged about 20 girls. I have heard back from a couple of them already, so hopefully I can maintain some interest there and get some dates out of it.
I also playing the sympathy card with this girl that I have been flirty with over the last month. Trying to get her to make me some dinner 😛
Hey Robot,
Wow you are out and about meeting lots of girls. Good on you. Sure you may not be getting laid, but at least you are out there at the moment, even if it is dancing with some girls. That’s more then what I can say.
Not much happening with me at the moment. The last week has been very quiet and I haven’t been out at all. The weekend just gone I stayed at home the entire time, didn’t help it was raining most of the weekend. All my friends were busy doing other stuff. I did think about heading into the city on Friday night, but didn’t feel like going by myself.
Be good when you get your car this week 🙂
Gosh anyone just reading this page will think we are some sex starved crazy men. LOL
Robot – I am of two minds about picking up girls at the bar. For me it comes down to simply this. I have never been successful at it. But I have a work friend who is 42 and he is very successful at it and most weekends has a story to share. I have been to the bars where he goes and they are filled with ladies who are 30 years plus. It’s more in our age range. 90% of night clubs in NZ are filled with girls 18 -25 years old. The local Irish bar I go to is more of a hangout place for people. I don’t know if any of ever watched “Cheers” and the bar the gang spend their time in. My bar is exactly like that bar, without the constant hot girls. LOL, but it is a place where you know most of the regulars and the bar staff know me by first name.
Rihanna, for myself. I don’t really enjoy sex without the connection. It simply isn’t arousing. I have been with girls who I met that night and the connection was there from the first 10 seconds. On the flip side, years ago I dated a girl for 3 weeks and we made it to the bedroom after about 4 dates. There was simply no connection and truth be told I couldn’t get the little fellow to “stand to attention”. Needless to say that I never went on another date with that girl. So no I personally don’t enjoy sex no matter what. I think if I did I would go to a prostitute every few months just to relieve myself
Hi Robot and Rihanna,
Hope you both had a great weekend. My weekend was fun, really good day on Saturday soaking in thermal hot pools in the afternoon then a dinner at a nice restaurant in the evening. A couple of glasses of red wine after the pools went straight to my head and it was a cheap drunk night for me. I got home at 9:30pm and went straight to bed. I slept for nearly 11 hours straight.
Not much to report on the romantic side of things. The girl who I had been flirting with went in another car so I barely talked to her the entire day. Will say she looked smoking hot in a bikini and it was nice to sit next to her in the pool for a while. Some of my other girl friends look pretty good too.
Infact the car that I went home in was all guys and it was all we could talk about the entire trip back. Girls, sex and bikinis. Turns out this girl is a big cock tease with a few guys. She like to flirt with everyone, so it is just not me she has been flirting with. I think you would like this girl Robot, she is attractive, smart, has nice boobs and loves to flirt. Pity I can’t private message you a picture of her. Haha oh well.
Interesting, one the guys had bumped into my Ex last weekend at the mall and he mentioned it to me. His observation was that she has lost her identity with her new guy. Apparently she has stop going to the gym since she moved in with this guy and she is now putting on some weight. She has also given up on dance too. She loved doing dance every week and was very good at it. That was interesting to hear and I wonder the reasoning behind it. Not that I should really care, but he seem to think that she no longer doing her things, she was all about fawning over the guy and how great he is.
Yeah I am looking forward to it. Sure it is only a day thing. Leave early and come back late, but it meals, drinks and girls in bikinis giving me back massages while I’m in a natural thermal hot pool
Hey Tommy
Just read your post and agree with Robot. Both Robot and myself have been around this site for a year now and know each other. Reading what you have written is an echo of what I wrote in my diary 7 months on. One year on it can still be tough, hang in there mate.I think about my Ex most days, but I have found the last couple of months to be easier. Some days I can be like “Gee I haven’t thought about her once”. However I am still fragile. Just a few weeks ago I was with some friends who had seen my Ex with her new man. Just them talking about how happy she is now, got me down for about 4 days.
My breakup was May last year and it was completely out of the blue, or felt like it. After reading the Relationship Rewind PDF I saw some similar themes in the switch and drift stage in the final few weeks of my relationship.
I also wish she had given me one more chance. Or even given me the chance to talk through the breakup. She literally broke up with me and while I sat in stunned silence she walked out of the bar where we were for a drink. She cleared her stuff out my place a few days later while I was at work. So I haven’t seen her since the day off the breakup. I still don’t know the real reason for the breakup as she told me at the time it was because she wasn’t ready for a serious relationship. Yet a few months later she was with another guy and has been living with him since.
Keep doing what you are doing. I would recommend not reaching out to her and keep posting here bud.
what!!!! I created a thread….haha that’s right I did too. I forgot about that one. Guess it took on a life of its own.
Agreed with Robot. Kevin writes an article here about the rebound relationship on this site. In many situations, straight after a breakup a person will miss the intimate moments they had in the relationship and will seek the quickest way to replicate that. i.e. have sex with someone else.
Yay for Friday 🙂 My favourite working day of the week. This weekend should be interesting. A group of us are heading on a small road trip tomorrow and are going to visit the hot pools about a hour away, before heading to a winery for dinner. The girl who I have kinda been flirting with the past couple of weeks is coming too 🙂
$10 a month, gee that is sad for a savings account. Not worth the effort really. How you got an approx. date set in mind for your move to Sydney? i.e. June/Jul or Christmas
Also have you thought of either blocking your Ex on Facebook or if you don’t want to do that, unfollow him. Unfollow is a great tool. It means whatever that person posts on their timeline doesn’t show up on your feed unless you click into their profile. I use this for a couple of friends who post 19 out 20 time rubbish like motivational posters or political shit. I still want to be friends with these people, but don’t want my wall clogged up with stuff like that. Every few weeks I will click on their profiles to see if anything interesting has happened in their lives.
You could do that with your Ex, that way you are still friends, but you don’t see what is happening in his life every day unless you check his profile
Having a car is a great thing and provides so much more freedom. Just they can be so darn expensive. I would be lost without my car. I have nothing fancy and probably never will. I have never been one of these guys that spend mega dollars on a car or knows the in an outs of a car. I find guys who talk constantly about their cars to be very boring. There is a couple of guys at my work who do that, every day they are talking cars. As long as the car gets me from A to B that’s all I care about.
Robot – I was thinking about your comments where you mention about life issues in the context of your Ex. For myself, the draw card of this site was the hope that I would get back with my Ex. She broke up with me in May last year and for the rest of last year, that was my dream. That she would come back and we would spend the rest of our lives together. I truly believed she was the girl for me. I was committed to the relationship when we were together and I was committed last year to Kevin’s plan to win her back. This year when I heard she had moved in with her new boyfriend. I think that was the breaking point for me, the line in the sand which shouldn’t off been crossed and I had to give up the dream of us ever getting back together.
I still regret the way things worked out between my Ex and myself. I wish I knew what was going on in her mind. The hardest thing I struggle with now days is primary I still don’t have anyone special in my life and the fact that my Ex replaced me so easily. It really hits my self worth and makes me think I was simply not good enough for her. If she couldn’t tell me the reason for the breakup even know I was fully committed to her and loved her 100% suggests to me that I simply was boring and not good enough.
Hey guys
SO you have all been busy overnight and a little bit for me to catch up on. I’m still at work so I will quickly answer a couple of questions and go in detail when I get home.
Raed – I live in Auckland, New Zealand. Land of hobbits and bungy jumping 🙂
Rihanna – I grew up in a small town in the South Island with a population around 5000 people. There was no work there outside of farming. A career I cant stand. So when I left school it was either stay and hate my job or move to the city. Auckland is in the North Island. Luckily I had an uncle who live in Auckland. I stayed with him for about 2 months, until I got my first job. Then I moved out and started flatting with some random strangers, but the place was close to work. For the first couple of years of living in Auckland I didn’t have a car so needed to live close to wherever I worked.
Anyway chat more once I get home and I will watch that video you linked Robot
Haha, we are all on the same page peeps 🙂 I know it sounds harsh Rihanna what we are saying, but we are concerned about your well being. I have and still get in that mindset where I believe my Ex is the “One” and it will all work out in the end. Its not a healthy place to be. But I have you guys to correct any wrong thinking I have had in the past.
Robot: This weekend just gone was my one year anniversary since the breakup (May 2nd). I relate with you about the Ex bullshit. I was apparently the first boyfriend she had in a few years, or so she told me. Now I’m not too sure by the way she moved on and hooked up with another guy. What still gets me is all the Bullshit promises she made to me, the whole “I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you”.
Then she changed her mind literally overnight. I got the full “its not you – it’s me” excuse as you know when she broke up with me. One year on and I have no clue as to the real reason she broke up with me…Not that it really matters any more. I still think I am 95% moved on.
Case in point, I went out to dinner at a friends place on Saturday night. I knew the girl who kissed me a couple of weeks ago was going also to this dinner. So I sent her a text in the morning to see if she wanted a ride. She replied straight away saying “Yes, as long as you don’t make me drive so I can have a few drinks (with a wink smile). For the rest of the day I was very happy and didn’t think about the Ex once. I picked her up and we went to the dinner. We had a fun night and played some board games/cards. I wasn’t drinking because I was driving. At the end of the night I drove this girl home and when we got back to her place we talked in the car for abit before she got out. Feeling a little bold I cheekily said “No goodbye kiss tonight?” She replied “Not tonight… we are just friends Steve” Then she poked her tongue at me and walked away to her door.
I got home and feeling a little lonely my thoughts went towards my Ex and how it had been exactly one year since I had last seen her. It had been 370 days since I have had sex too….not that I am counting.
But I feel like on the whole I have moved on, its really during those quiet late at night lonely times or first thing in the morning when I’m still laying in bed that I miss my Ex the most
Rihanna – Hearing you say that a guy cant maintain a relationship because he is financially unstable is just another Bullshit excuse in my mind. For the last 6000 years plus mankind have made relationships work if they wanted it too. Relationship were formed during the Great depression of 1929 that have last for years. Think about that where you literally had no money, no place to live and the only thing you could eat for days is turnips. Yet out that couples got together, made love and had happy relationships that lasted a life time. Even today there are many people who are in the financial shit and close to being bankrupt yet they are still in a happy relationship.
As far as my cynical mind thinks it comes down to this “If a guy or girl wants to be with their partner, than nothing on this earth will stop that from happening be it war, famine, distance, addictions, finances or alien invasion. If a guy or girl doesn’t want to be with another person then every single excuse will be used to ensure they breakup or not get back together, whether it be war, famine, distance, addictions, finances or alien invasion”
Your Ex doesn’t want to be with you right now and because he doesn’t want to be a complete dick he is using the excuse of being “Financially unstable”. If it wasn’t finances there will be some other excuse.
Look at me. My Ex told me she didn’t want to be in a serious relationship when she broke up with me, yet 4 months after that she is with another guy and 2 months after that she had moved in with him and they are still together. That is not the actions of a girl who doesn’t want to be in a serious relationship.
You could argue that your Ex is still ‘single’ and has been for a year. But how do you honestly know that. You live in different cities separated by a 3 hour plane flight. What do you know what he gets up to every Friday night? Very likely he is going to his Art shows and chatting up the girls that come to view his paintings. Then at the end of the night he is taking a new girl home every Friday and having sex with that girl the entire night. Sure he may be ‘single’ but he has a different girl every week. Girls go crazy over artist. Probably the reason he gets rude with you every now and then is because you text him when he is in the middle of having sex with a girl and it annoys him.
Robot and Raed – Manny Pacquiao should of won and I am starting to believe the conspiracy theories out there that the fight was rigged from the start.
