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I agree with Lee. We need to act and put ourselves across in attractive ways. Make ourselves seem like new fresh people, that will set ourselves up for someone new or even their return
I agree with absolutely with what you just said. The thought of her and another guy makes me ill but they are just rebounds… doesn’t mean it can’t work out and these guys replace us. They will walk over dead bodies to get what they want. They want it NOW.
Unfortunately she will see this as you being weak and an excuse. All three of us here are in a dire situation that only time will fix. Day 12 for me and I’m giving up hope.
I wouldn’t message her but if you wanna test the water then go ahead, she likely doesn’t care that you’re taking an interest in this friend, all she cares about is your situation with her
Just read yor story, I had actually read it before and now I remember. It’s so sad that love can drive us to do things like snoop, her joining dating sites, that is something I would never want to know, even if mine is talking to someone else right now I don’t want to know.
All really does seem lost right now for all of us here but I’m past caring, every day is the same so I’m getting used to it
Yes mate tough times…I think it’s the other fella who has a mrs with two young ones. Mine has none, neither of us have kids. We both wanted kids, we’d talked about it multiple times but not in recent time, maybe I should have seen these seeds of doubt a few months back.
Online coaching sounds good but I am broke. Might just continue to read stuff online although I am trying to focus on better things like playing guitar again, learning a language I’m trying to learn and working out. I’m going to read your story now and see if that helps. Tonight is a hard night, i miss her like fuck and hate that I can’t just chill with her. She does suffer with anxiety and depression though, this isn’t all my fault, i need to remind myself of that sometimes
Thanks for the words of encouragement Lee. I’m sure you’ve had your fair share of crap and it does seem like your situation is very deep. But I’m glad you’re back to no contact. I hope she changes her mind… I know you don’t want to get your stuff after quarantine but maybe the willingness will make you look strong to her? Obviously with the boy in the picture that might tug on her heart strings also?
I have searched it all to death you’re right, all the no contact videos and everything else. I know the score. Just feel powerless to all this bullshit going on. last year was my first nice year since 2013, I’d finally got some substance back after wasting my teens.
I’m should hide it you’re right but I’m gonna give in and go on it. But I’m staying off messenger so when she is online she can see that I’m offline and she knows I’m not stalking her or staring at her online.
Nicely put Lee. How long were you together and how long have you been no contact for? Well I’m sure she just has the stuff laying around? Don’t you need to get all this stuff at some point?
I like what you said about the Bi Product bit. I just go through so many waves of emotion, this is day 11. I start to think I’m getting better and then I become weak again and get close to tears but working out keeps me straight and makes me feel better. 38 is not that old, I’m 25 but really don’t care about anything at this stage.
Like you said, at this point does she actually care that you’ve seen the light? how long has it been?
I’m sure we will all get there. But my anxiety is through the roof and I cannot stop checking social media, but I don’t wanna delete her.
we were together almost 2 years. No she isb’t taking any medication at the moment. I feel that is irrelevant. It’s very hard not to stalk social media with the current situation. Every day that goes by I just feel more hopeless
Haha quite far lol. Online on Facebook and Whatsapp, I haven’t been blocked yet… there is fucked all to do at the moment because we are all out of work… driving myself crazy. Some moments I get angry and feel like blocking her and other moments I’m reminiscing about the good times
from Essex mate what about you? I get what you’re saying… but i reckon neither of us will want them to think anything about us, if they never come back eventuaky we won’t care.
however it would be nice to have them back because we obviously value them in someway.. mine keeps coming online but says nothin.
I know, it’s day 11 now so I’ll just carry on through.
Day 1, I thought it had been longer. Just leave her for now, no more contact, contact should have been broke ages ago and she sounds like the type of girl who will struggle with no contact. As long as you were cool when she said about the laptop
Hi Patricia thanks,
She didn’t give any examples. She tries to break up back in February, I ignored her and two days later she came flying back. She just gets these moments of doubt, she suffers from anxiety and depression. It’s nothing specific that I’ve done.
Just a bit out the blue because we had been texting fine and had decent phonecalls and she like thank you so much for phoning etc.
She hasn’t blocked me on social media, I still see her online unfortunately. Blocking her won’t help either that’s just spiteful. I’m just trying to remain neutral. This is day 11
That’s it mate, you can’t support her emotionally becausd it involves you. I’m sure it is very nice, maybe she will respond well to it as well, it’s not always like they say online.
But now you gotta wait and focus on you. all stuff you already know. It’s well hard to take your mind off them I get it, I’m thinking about mine 24/7, it’s been 10 days since she done it. Can’t see her coming back, maybe for the best. I know she still loves me though, she said it before she hung up. Who knows.
Do you still have yours on social media?
okay ignore my last post I just read your post. What did she say? Did she just say yeah I got your letter? I think a letter is something you do after 3 or 4 months. Trust me it’a a nice gesture and all but emotional and nice guys finish last 85 percent of the time, it is sad I know but it’s just how girls normally see it.
Forget the letter and go no contact now until she says hey as I said. She will contact you ‘m sure of it but the time may have been extended now due to the letter
I tried replying before and I have half forgot what I said but here goes.
Yeah this is a tricky one. I don’t understand why she is getting mad about you not being in her life when she done this? She clearly wants to talk to you.
I’d wait for her to say hey again and just talk about normal things, try not to bring up the past but just show her you are trying to be involved with her but not too much…she dumped you right? So she can’t expect you to be all over her.
If it’s gonna work you’ve gotta remind her why she got with you in the first place. You’ve got to create good feelings and good times. Just listen to her and talk to her if she is willing to talk but don’t get emotional yourself or have a go at her
