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I say just be super confident if you ever are around him will show him what he’s lost. Be super happy and dress to impress, and you’ll do it on your own! As for being around him, I’d say only talk to him if he talks to you first. Ignore him otherwise. If you have to, or do want to talk to him, be polite but try to keep it to a minimum. I think that would be the classy way to go.
I think it sounds like he’s still having an internal conflict. Best not to go along with it, since I’m sure his attitude changes by the day, or the hour even. As for your birthday…I’m not really sure. If it were me, I’d tell him I don’t want him to celebrate it. But that might be hard/impossible. So I think just say thanks, be appreciative and not cold, but don’t accept any advances.
I know how that goes, trust me. I always wanted to go places with my ex and he’d never take me, but he’d go with his best friend at the drop of a hat. His best friend’s a guy, but still…
Maybe just try to tell him in a gentle way? Maybe ask him to respect your feelings because it’s a difficult time for you. You know him better than I do. 🙂
It sounds like you could definitely get back together! 🙂 Maybe he really did just need a few weeks to be on his own. Especially since his family is rooting for you, it sounds like you have a good chance. 🙂
Hm..if I were you I’d still be friendly, but I would definitely say no to his advances. I think giving in will do more harm than good in the long run. Maybe start going out and doing more stuff without him, evaluate yourself and see what you can change (that you want to change) that would be good for making the relationship better, and go from there. 🙂
Today just got hard for me. I’m texting an old friend of mine and the way he talks is pretty much exactly the same way my ex did. It makes me wish it was my ex instead. It reminds me of how things used to be and makes me really miss him. 🙁
Okay, thanks! And from there you just kind of play by ear whether or not they still have feelings for you?
I’d say wait the whole 30. She doesn’t want you to break NC, so don’t. 🙂 And after you finish the 30 days, it will be a good way to start talking to her again. You can bring this up and tell her what you wanted to say, and I think she will appreciate that. But not until the 30 days are up.
I really do think you have a chance. 🙂 Especially since it seems like he still has feelings for you.
Take some time away from him, or keep contact to a minimal. It will make him miss you, and will give him time to get over all of his negative feelings of you. Sorry it was so close to your anniversary. 🙁
I agree with SuzyLou. Maintain some contact. It could be that she never actually lost her feelings for you, but her depression is making her feel that way. It’s just something she needs to work on and hopefully with some time she’ll get better. I’m in a similar situation with the whole being depressed thing, but my issue is my ex was the one who wanted to break up. Though it sounds like with your ex she’s at least trying to figure herself out and work on it.
SuzyLou,
I can totally relate. It’s really hard not to think about your ex and wonder what they’re doing. For me, I don’t know if my ex wants to get back together. And like you said, will he do any changing if he does want to get back together? Or does it not matter to him? I’m trying to focus on bettering myself, and I know it will be good even if he doesn’t want me back, but a little part of me will feel let down, because I know a little part of me wants to become a better person for him as well, not just for me (though most of it is for me)!
And Alikat, I’d say do NC. He blocked you because he was hurt. But give him a few days or a few weeks, I bet he’ll be unblocking you and telling you he misses you. And if not, maybe he just needs more time. 🙂
If your therapist thinks you should, maybe you should. When you contact him, just tell him you’d have waited the whole 40 days, but something important came up that you needed to talk to him about right away. And explain to him about how you’re going to therapy and how it made you realize your fear of commitment. Only if you feel like you’re ready to tell him though. If you don’t feel like you’re ready, wait out the last 14 days.
