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Hi @mike2014 I hope this link may shed some light? – [removed]
Ive done the no contact now for 8 days out of 30 days and I haven’t heard from her at all. I spoke to her cousins husband 2 days ago who was with her during christmas, he said she was her joking around self though noticed quite a bit she was doing a lot of thinking and pondering.
Its quite difficult not having her here with me especially over the christmas period and tomorrow New Years Eve, I think about her 24/7, I just wonder if she is also doing the same?
She has moved out to a trendy area near the beach where there are a lot of people our age (31 & 32) live. Im really worried she has already met someone and forgotten about me.Do girls normally move on this quickly after spending over 5 years together? Considering we were talking about getting engaged June/July, Kids over the past few years especially this year and buying a house together?
@aussie_guy had I known where my ex was at emotionally towards the end of the relationship and read this article I probably would have saved it.
Thanks for sharing!
oh no… serious @Aphrodite ?
I re-read your first message to me. You are right, so I have been surfing most days, gym and run I try to get in most days now during the holiday break.Did you read our discovery after your first message? What are your thoughts now? Im interested as you were again pretty spot on.
No Aussie_guy, they don’t move on that quick. A fling maybe, a rebound, but no, they don’t move on that quick.
When you’re in your early 20’s it’s easy to go from one to another but the other you get the selection of partners is reduced and you become more selective. She will not move on quickly, unless she really didn’t love you nor actually like you. So there you have it, you need to ride the storm out.Good article, I had a quick read.
I’ve realised with my ex, to ever get him back I need to stand on my own two feet. I relied on him financially while I kicked back! Haha.I need to get back to how I was when he first met me. I need to get the dynamics back. When he first met me I had job, house , car, holidays…I did it all on my own but soon as he worked abroad I leant on him more and more. I don’t think either of us knew the resentment that was building.
He’s now responding to my texts but said they are not helping us move on.
I’ve told him how disappointment I am that he doesn’t want to rebuild the unique relationship we had. How for us to both find someone else will take years to even match what we had and even then no guarantees it would work.
He agreed and told me I had a valid point but nevertheless he’s told me to move on. He’s still angry. Because of our strength of what he had once and everything we’ve been through, travelled the world, stood at side lines of rugby matches to watch my son… To eating chocolate in bed and saying how disgusting we were to do such thing! Haha. But all these memories will hopefully come more forward I his mind as his anger drops.
He’s said to me on numerous occassions that he will never find anyone else so compatible.
He can’t move on… How can he after everything we’ve been through? I’m banking on the anger dropping and being reunited and start afresh. In mean time i need to move on and become the girl he once met again. I just hope I still want him by then!Where in Oz are you Aussie_guy. All my family are out there and I’m the only one here in UK, it’s freezing here and I’m not having fun! I want to be out on the beach too! 😛
I doubt she would be the type of person to have a fling or a rebound she does have values.
Thats what I’m doing, getting back to the person I was so I can become attractive again, this year my company lost importation rights to a big brand we have had for 30 years, now we are just a dealer so we have been nothing all year, so not really attractive when your not knowing where the company is going and whether you will have a job still, now that has all completely change as of the last couple of weeks. I let her know about it as well and a huge opportunity for me to drive this new product in Australia and New Zealand on my own.Its a good article hey… glad you read it.
I think for now, try to remove the emotional stuff from it as hard as that sounds. I live in Queensland.
Hey Aussie_guy,
It’s good to have something to work for, we both need to drive hard to make ourselves better…. More attractive, confident.
Can get bogged down in a comfy relationship and things can get taken for granted on both sides.I’ve had a few exchange of emails as I said and now I’m re reading them, reading into things and totally going stir crazy. He’s not said he doesn’t love me, not that I’ve asked that question as too scared.
Has she told you that she doesn’t love you?Hey Currumbin is MY beach! I’m moving to Currumbin at some stage. I can see myself sitting on Elephant rock with a beer in hand with the wind in my hair…oh yeh!
I will have you know I’m a member of the First Fleet Association! Oh yeah.Hey @Bella,
I randomly just woke up didn’t even hear your email come through.
I’m on the GC but the Northern side of the beach. She has moved to Mermaid as she likes Nobby’s area, trendy, people our age living there though can come across quite fake as you may know. All her friends are here so knows no one there but is very good at meeting people quite easily as she is an out going person.
Yes of course she loves me she has told me on many occasions, she told me after we broke up, when we went to a wedding in Adelaide, (3 weeks after calling it and temporally moving into a friends house over the road because it was to emotional for the both of us) that she was nervous seeing me and was really looking forward to seeing me. We were great at that wedding. She got up set a couple of times when I put my hard attitude on (in a respectful way) regarding her moving out as I needed time to recover from this so I can move on with my life. The moving has dragged on from 8 weeks ago to last Sunday for reasons we both contributed to.Yes you are right, we took each other for granted and I also think we got bogged down though this trust issue she has which is not my fault because if her past is needing to be sorted by her. We also needed to communicate a lot better which we did many many times but struggled in some areas.
Sometimes people, whether your a phycologist (as she is) or not need educating for them to know what to do. We had our faults and I would love to work on them with her, unfortunately New Years is approaching and I haven’t heard from her for 8 days, Sunday before Christmas 🙁Currumbin is a beautiful place, great spot, though, a pain if you have to travel to South Brisbane a lot.
If you have FB let me know, your obviously a local? We could possibly meet?You must have sensed I was thinking about Currumbin. Lol
Just give it time Aussie_guy. She loves you but has issues. You need this time to improve yourself as I do too. It’s positive step forward, it’s just this time alone sucks, not knowing what the future holds.
My ex loved me so much I took it for granted. I thought he would be always there and I thought I would be the one to walk away,which I initially did.
That feeling I had lasted 6 weeks where I didn’t want to see him, talk to him or have anything to do with him. So I’m living proof that a change of thought does exist. The fact is however hurt I was, I still loved him but the hurt over rode the love that I didn’t see it.
The love is there, we need to both improve our lives, and wait for them to come back. I’m pretty sure that my guy will but it’s not going to be soon. Maybe in the Spring. We were too good together for him to go forever.
Sounds a bit like your ex.I’d love to meet up except in I’m London!
I’m dual nationality as I was born here. I’ve an Aussie mother who originates from Glen Innes. My brother owns Queensland Salads in Brisbane, lives in East Gravatt. Mum lives in South Tweed. My cousins is on the GC too. As is said we’ve been in Oz since the first ship arrived! Lol. Just so happened my mother decided to come over to UK for an adventure when she was 20, married my dad, had 2 kids and buggered back of to Oz when I was 17! Lol. So I’m the only family member here in the UK now. Once my youngest finishes school here then I will wing my way back to Oz and set up around Currumbin.
I’m on facebook, how do I add you ? I doubt your real name is Aussie_guy lolLol maybe.
Yes it does suck very much.
I was exactly the same way, took it for granted though so did she. I loved her so much but didn’t try as hard as I knew I could.
Again the same, I thought I also was going to walk but kept in there and believed it wasn’t the right decision because I just knew it was the wrong thing to do, we were meant to be.
Meow 6 weeks Thats incredible. There you go…!!!I think the love is also there but now EVERYTHING has been moved out it has only been 8 days where she has no reason to contact. But yes very similar I guess. She does need to sort her shit out because we certainly did have a great love for each other, I mean we hugged four times Sunday week ago when she picked up the last of her things. She does still care about me and my family a lot. Including our cat we got this year.
I know Glenn Innes, nice quite country place.
So is your little one your partners? Will you all come over?
No lol my name isn’t that, what’s your email address linked to your FB and I’ll add you.
Need to go back to sleep now as it 3:42am and I’m going for a surf at about 5:39-6am.Thanks for posting the article…good read
I seriously doubt she will move on quickly. It’s been 8 months and my ex still hasn’t moved on to someone else.
You never know what is going on in their heads. Its weird how she will be so emotional in front of me even so long after the breakup, but it doesn’t mean anything about getting back together. It’s hard not to think about in the beginning, but over time you have to try not to think about it or you will never get better. I try to be more positive and confident everyday in all aspects of life. I have to remember she is the one who left me and the future if any is in her hands and not mine. She is the one who wanted to “work on herself”. I can’t be there for her anymore and I have only myself to work on. I go out most weekends and hopefully one day I will meet someone who I enjoy spending time with enough for more than one night.
I hop things work out for you and you find happiness with your ex or someone else…good luck
Aussie_guy. My email is [removed]. No, my boys are not my ex’s even though he’s been in their lives for the last 8 years and as my youngest is now 11 whose real dad is not on the scene, my ex really did play dad. Ouch….it hurts a Lot what’s happened. You will never know 🙁
Oh, I lived in Glen Innes for a whole year and the one thing I remember all the girls hated me! LolMike2014. You will find happiness, I mean we all will…it’s just this rubbish we have to go through to get to the end and the beginning of happiness.
Thanks Belle,
I hope you find happiness as well. The holidays are alittle tough because when you spend so many years with someone you are used to doing the holiday stuff with them. It is rubbish lol. Best of luck to you
It is rubbish, it’s so depressing. I wonder who I’m gonna kiss on new years eve:(
I’ve tried talking to other guys but I compare them all to ex. There’s no point in it really because all I want is him. How the hell doesn’t he feel the same way… I really feel like I’ve teleported to some strange rubbish reality.
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