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Yeah I should’ve shot down that person for shouting it out loud I’ve never liked him anyway he’s too loud and offensive. Well I was so angry at my ex what he really did is fuxked up I am an introvert and basically everyone is waiting for me to tick like a time bomb and air my dirty laundry at social media or they pity me. I am sure that’s how other people view it but no I am not gonna do any of those two. I think that depression is fairly common it does seem like our exes is fine now. Mine was diagnosed with quarter life crisis and the time he was hospitalized he is really incoherent and delusional he was seeing visions I know he takes med for schizos and depressed people and that is pretty heavy. I monitored him everyday even sleeping in the hospital. After checking out of the hospital he didn’t attend uni for a month. After recovery he didn’t continue his meds and talk therapy. So it’s just my diagnosis but my ex’s depression was never treated he is still depressed until now. He was a different person after he was hospitalized everything was an all time low to him his selfconfidence etc. His academic standing really is a trigger whenever he was not doing well in acads he will start pushing me away will not talk to me for days and do self loathing.
I doubt that anyone might know because it will shame him he is drowning with debt. I doubt that anyone will be interested in me now hahahaha they saw me at the party a crying mess but I want to have some friends if that is possible. I really do hope he still feels something for me even though he stated in our breakup that he doesn’t feel anything for me anymore. I think they owe us the truth and it might be bugging them now how they have hurt someone that genuinely cared for them.
You compromised so much some people won’t even sacrifice that much for a person. It seem cowardly of her to give in to family pressure after liking you for so long then finally having you as her bf. Maybe because we are still fairly young and even dependent to our parents that her family was able to sway her decision or she was too filial.
That sounds like a toxic person in general. You shouldn’t have to deal with people like that. I know my ex is still depressed too even with the medication and therapy. Her therapist actually said that her parents are probably the root cause of her depression but she can’t really say anything to them because it’s a culture thing and i understood that. Both of us have pretty much the same cultural background except her parents are more old school while mine are very Americanized. Her parents kind of rule with and iron fist, while my mom is pretty much like my best friend to where i can tell her anything and she can’t stop me. That was a problem her parents had with my family. Because of her depression and everything going on i just wanted to show her otherwise but i guess she ended up listening to what they said more and the fact that she still lives at home makes it worse because every time we would go out on dates or something they would bombard her with questions and i guess she found that annoying (she gets irritated easily).
I’m sure someone knows. Because for me i tell my best friends everything as far as breakups go, how I’m feeling, etc. I’m pretty sure someone will want you, crying or not, it just shows how committed to him you were. If anything they probably viewed your ex as the asshole. As much as i try to convince myself of the same thing I’m sure they do. With all those years they had feelings for us the feeling doesn’t die out. Right now they are probably convincing themselves that what they did was right and it will bite them in the ass eventually. They may even act when it’s too late but who knows. My ex said the same thing to me too but she said when she’s with me she feels everything, but when we go back home and she’s away from me she doesn’t. She tried saying the last time she was with me she was annoyed with me but that was like once out of the entire time and that was because of the vibe i was getting from her. Because how can anybody be happy when you can feel tension in the air? If you know something is wrong with your S/O and they don’t tell you what is going on how can they expect us to just ignore it? Doesn’t make sense.
I’m always down to compromise and make reasonable sacrifices it’s not hard especially if I’m looking for something serious. I’m pretty sure that’s what happened though even though she won’t admit it. I may be dumb but not entirely stupid. I was able to recognize when the changes and problems started. She tried to say it was only part of the reason but it didn’t make sense to me because everything was fine up until that point so what exactly changed? I feel it may have been because of what her parents said her view about the relationship changed and that’s BS. I was able to accept her for whatever she’s done in the past and everything cause history is what it is history even if people said things about her i didn’t care. Hopefully she realizes everything soon.
Hiya no updates actually but I know he is hiding his facebook stories from me. I am actually tempted to watch it been feeling really down. I think I cried again for most of the day.
It doesn’t hurt to watch his stories but if he is deliberately hiding his stories from you then he obviously still thinking about you. Why would anyone go through that kind of trouble for if they weren’t thinking of you? Just take it as a sign if anything. Don’t think too negatively about it because it will bring you down (i should know because I’ve been rather negative myself for the last two days and it’s starting to scare me). Like I said before him hiding it from you, posting things that pertain to your relationship are signs. If you really want to know what is on his story ask your best friend that you trust that would not tell him to view it if that’ll bring you comfort. Also, i know it’s hard given how popular it is for everyone, but if social media is stressing you out about it then take a break from it. I may do the same thing because i know it kind of hurts my healing process as well. Don’t worry you’re not alone as far as feeling down goes because it still hurts the both of us that someone we gave everything to just up and walks out on us. Give yourself the chance to cry it’s ok, for me it’s kind of getting a little dangerous and out of control (totally skipped the crying, and i think I’m starting to develop severe depression from this BS). Just hang in there the best you can because something good is bound to happen to us at some point right? We can’t keep taking losses forever. I don’t know if this analogy will work for you, but think of the basketball team the golden state warriors (I’m a huge basketball fan, idk if you know them or anything but I’m going to use them in this analogy), so for years they continued to take losses, couldn’t make it to the playoffs some years and when they did they couldn’t even make it to the finals. Well after gathering the right pieces, working hard, and sticking with it they finally got their first championship and have been in the top of the NBA ever since. Right now we are the GSW, right now we have to gather our pieces, work hard and sticking to it and eventually we will also reach our goal. If any of this was easy then this forum wouldn’t be here for people to reach out and try to help each other. Of course it’s always easier to quit and let life just beat us down, but nobody said that obtaining happiness was easy. If we quit and give up we would be just like our ex’s who walked out on us and took the easy route instead of sticking it out for the rough part. It sucks and it’s painful but we are both fighters with a don’t quit mentality, it’s only painful because we don’t see any results right away but as you know results takes time and a lot of effort. Your efforts are starting to show because it is affecting your ex, you’re getting a reaction out of him. Some people (like me) get no reaction (at least ones that we can’t see). So let yourself feel because it is part of the healing process, if you feel down and hopeless just tell yourself that you don’t have to get your ex back today, but it does not mean you can’t get him back, Because there will always be that chance.
Hey so I just watched a coaches video and wanted to know your opinion on it. So the video was on short term relationships, and even though I only dated my ex for 5 months (which is considered short term), she did have feelings for me for 5 years. So I guess my question is should i end NC earlier because my window may be smaller than most who have been in long term relationships or does the connection i developed with her for the 5 year time frame count for anything as well. There were times where she would call me late at night crying because she was afraid to lose me so i guess based on that there would still be some emotional connection, but do you think i should try and contact her?
I watched a lot of youtube videos actually and most of them said that if your ex constantly reach out to you with positive things and not negative ones even though you are ignoring her you should end NC.You did said that she calls you and tells you she doesn’t one to lose you that is a positive one. Plus even though you only dated for 5 months I believe there is already a strong connection because for me by that time I was already firm with my decision to love my ex at 5 months time frame even though I started to see his flaws.
May i ask why I feel guilty talking with other guys I don’t know why but I really feel that.
I actually think I can’t give up on our relationship. He is a big basketball fanatic actually. He also hides his fb stories to my bestfriend wtf.
She actually told me that before we broke up so losing me was always a fear for her as well so i don’t understand why she did what she did. I’m still waiting on the reach out but it is getting harder. I just want a sign or something but it’s so hard to read her. I get what you mean though because she did say that she loved me as well and has been wanting to tell me since the beginning but wasn’t sure if she should.
It’s ok to feel guilty about it because you still have feelings for your ex, i would probably feel guilty as well but if it helps you feel better than it’s not too bad. It’s not like you have any intention of dating them or anything. Sometimes it’s better to use that as a form of distraction, or a confidence boost. It raises your attraction level if anything so don’t beat yourself up over it.
I understand because i feel the same way even when i feel absolutely hopeless. Well that’s good hopefully you understood my analogy then. He’s really being petty about everything then, because eventually he will wonder about you. It’ll take time but if he plays it that way then it’ll crumble soon, it seems like a front to hide his feelings to me.
Already saw his my day through a friend he posted a screenshot of the song “It’ll be Alright – Dean Lewis” I listened to it it was a song about letting go I feel pathetic but I did cry.
He could be posting that up so that he can get some attention, probably from you if you did view it, that being said apparently what he did worked but don’t worry about it. You’re getting some kind of reaction from him for what you’re doing, atleast it’s something. I on the other hand just make myself more depressed by listening to more depressing music. Just let yourself feel for now and let out what you can, eventually it’ll all work out.
Stop listening to depressing music it really brings you down. Damn the setback this week is astonishing luckily this week is already coming to an end we got more struggles to go we can do it. Thank you again for being with me and advicing mw through the week you’re a great help.
Sadly most of my favorite artists makes depressing music. I’ll be ok though, it’s doesn’t bring me down super hard. It’s better me sitting in silence just thinking. It’s ok it’s supposed to get easier but there will definitely be more set backs. No problem, i don’t mind helping but you’ve done a lot to help me as well.
Have you also thought that maybe our ex’s are also doing NC because they don’t know how they should approach us? Or is that just me? Mainly because i know my ex will feel bad and guilty for what she did to me so i figured that’s what she may be doing but idk.
I definitely think mine is doing NC plus I know from our years together he’s not the confrontational type I always address the issues first but fortunately I know he will contact me soon because I still have some of his things and him mine after that I’ll try to initiate contact. But you know I sometimes think that maybe we should be apart for years not only months so maybe we can grow.
I think my ex is too if not then because of she’s guilty for hurting me or something she scared to reach out and see how I’d react (I’m kind of known to have a temper). My ex is also not confrontational, total opposite of me. I mean it would depend i guess on if you want your ex back or not, because anything can happen if it’s years.
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