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ok so he pocket dial the house phone and my youngest picks up. she open her mouth and I took the phone from her. I heard voices and thought hell no I gotta go. (the voice were very familiar) anyways I took of and went by first my stupid cousins brothers house and sure enough his car was there. I was in shock. anyways some how he knew I was there. he takes off in his car and I follow him. he then turns around and starts following me. I had to cut cars and everything to loose him. he almost rammed into my car and everything and at one point he said he was gonna call the cops on me. so what happen was I lost him finally and got some where safe. thing being my oldest was with me. so what happen was he kept calling me and I didnt get it. (he left me a voice mail saying he let everyone know I was there and that he was gonna call the cops if I went there and that I better not do anything to the stupid peoples cars and that he took a pic of my tag being there, Idk how.) I called his mother she said he called her and sounded mad saying that I was over there and hung up on her. anyways as I left from my safe place I passed by about 3 hours later and his car was there. :'( he recently called his mother Im guessing he had just left. and today is my youngest birthday. he left me from the mall the other day to go trick or treating with that bitch. Im guessing hes been doing this for a while already as all of them feel comfortable with this shit. why me? :'( do I even have any chance at getting him back? I dont want to see him at all. Im so pissed but feel I still love him. Im really hurt. anyone please help me I feel really desperate. how do I get him to come back to me? I love him. why are they doing this shit to me? thanks
I am so sorry that you’re going through so much pain!
But are you sure he’s with your cousin?
and most importantly he’s not cheating on you because you both are not even together. I know how harsh it sounds but its the truth.
If he’s with someone else, it must be a rebound!!
Remember what kevin said? Dont worry about the rebound and play it cool.
you should start doing NC right away. Don’t even talk about the kids anymore and find a job.
Divorce doesn’t mean that all hopes are gone. You both can even start a fresh after divorce. But don’t lose your self respect. You tried everything to make it work not you shouldn’t do anything. Let it be and move on with your life. I am not saying he wouldn’t come back but you should handle your life first. Get things sorted out. Just move on and dont even think about him as he’s not being nice to you.
We always find things when we stop looking for it!!
I am always with you here. 🙂@divjun thanks for your response. im so shattered. im humiliated and everything else. im so hurt. 🙁 I tought we were gonna get back together. :'( I really hope everyone here gets their ex back. how could they both do this to me? I hate that I still have false hope. I wonder how long everyone else has known. my oldest told me that this cousins father doesnt care as long as hes not in his house so I guess they go to her brothers. his mothers a liar and hypocrite. I need to move asap. also another thing is no one cares. why did he tell me the other day about its not the right time for a hug? why did he leave me for her to go trick or treating? also supposedly they are getting serious and this hurts really bad. none of them cared about my dads death in july. :'( is he doing this because hes hurt so bad? I feel I have no closure and I guess I’ll never get him back. I guess this is my end. :'( everyone is telling me to let him go. :'( how long should I do no contact for and do you think he’ll forget me and get more serious with her. he told my kids they can be a weird happy family. wtf? why? thanks everyone for your help I really appreciate it. I really hope everyone else here gets their ex’s back. btw my oldest said that bitch cousin asked him “how I was doing” wtf? and why do they have no conscious?
Aamls I know how you’re feeling. Dont do anything. Dont text or call him. Dont even reply if he texts you. Do the NC till you feel happy about yourself. And he cannot forget you like that.
If he’s with your cousin, it must be a rebound. And dont forget that rebound relationship goes forward fast but I also ends soon.I repeat IF YOU ARE 100% SURE HE IS IN RELATION WITH YOUR COUSIN THEN ONLY DO NC.
@aamls I’m really sorry you are feeling this way please do no NC .It is really hard for you when they are doing these kind of things right in your face..Try to go out with your friends and meet new people I know it is easier said than done but please try to do this for your self.
thanks guys. 🙂 ok so he talked to his mom and I kinda believe her story. idk how much true it is but it was him telling his mom. so he told her this was his first time going there. some how he was invited over. supposedly my cousin wasnt there and they were cooking duck and he was helping cook. anyways supposedly someone sent him out and he saw my car and took pics and then he followed me. Idk what to think of this. supposedly hes coming over later to cut a cake and he wants to take her ice skating. maybe i’ll be invited but I doubt it even more now with what happen. I hope he wasnt there with her but this is still very painful and such. ugh wish me luck guys. and thanks again. 🙂
@aamls Have you signed the divorce papers yet? If you haven’t then, he is cheating if he is still married to you even if you are separated.
This is so painful. And I know that the pain makes it hard and you do things that you wouldn’t otherwise do. But if he is over there or not over there, it really doesn’t matter. The thing that is going to want him to come back to you is time and healing and seeing you be the attractive woman you were when he fell in love with you.
Do you guys have plans for the birthday today?
I really want to believe the above story. 🙁 I hope its true. anyways no papers have been sign at all and im not planning on signing anything either. no we didnt agree on anything but he keeps saying hes gonna bring a cake and he wants to take her ice skating without me. :-/ shes scared and wants to go regular skating. :-/ idk whats gonna happen, I dont think I want to even be here when he comes by. 🙁 I feel scared to see him to be honest and not ready to confront him. :-/ any advise? what do you guys think he hasnt even tried to reach me at all as of yet. 🙁 anyone? thanks
so I just found out ive lost him forever. we talked and well he said at one point or another that I havent change, and he said well never ever get back together again. :'( he know he told my oldest he could hang out with who ever he wants. wtf? I know he told his mom something but she didnt tell me and said he went in to pay the phone. he said in a few months hes gonna stop paying the bills and im gonna have to pay them. I may have to get rid of my car. :'( also he said that we cant make it work that we were always fighting and that at the end he wasnt holding me because he wasnt feeling love for me. but he never told me anything. he came to my door and said he calls everyone sweety and he said that I also made him feel insecure and now his self esteem is high. Ive notice. ;-( he said we use to fight a lot I told him that we could fix that and he said no I told him why cant we try concealing and he said it wouldnt work and then said he didnt want to try anymore. I told him your showing the kids to give up and he said hes showing the girls not to stay with a cheater. he said he gave me a chance already because of the kids and I screwed it up. he also said that these are the consequences to ones actions and sometimes you dont know what you have till its gone. I asked if I could come along he said no and that the kids are gonna have to get use to that. at one point he said maybe in the future my oldest threw an egg and he got mad cause some of it landed on his pants and he started saying the same thing all over again. 🙁 he told me to go look for his cousin or the other guy. I told him he doesnt have to disrespect me. he said to take the guy away from my mother and go with him that he would want me over her. he also said that if I went looking for other guys I could find others. I told him I didnt go looking for anyone and he said or kept saying no to me. he also said that im getting to close to him and that to not touch his stuff that he doesnt touch mines, (lies) he also said that he never stalked me and that he never called his mom asking if i was dating anyone. he said that he told her he hopes i was with someone and that i was happy. he also said that he doesnt want me to be sad that he wants me to be happy. that he already forgot about me and doesnt feel anything for me. he said that some other things i dont remember atm. he wants his divorce and once he gets it he doesnt want to be married to me anymore. he said that hes only gonna think of me as his first love mother of his kids and care for me as the mother of his kids. I feel so hurt idk what to do. I dont want to lose my husband. he said he wish he could end this fast because of the kids and I said us he kept saying no to me. he also said that he wasnt mad anymore but he ended up getting mad when he was saying go with those other people. I heard it in his voice. he also said he wont ever trust me again and there was never nothing there. he also said that he would come home from work and he had to cook and clean which wasnt true because I would do it. anyways there may be more stuff but I cant remember. so with all this said I guess I lost him forever. I know theres other people out there and whatever it is that everyone says Ive heard it all thing being I dont want to let him go. I love him so much. ive also heard maybe with time but what am I suppose to do. I miss him so much. according to him its that we were used to eachother well him he used to be me im just used to him but its not true. I want and need him in my life. I understand I have to give him time and space and I understand I need to keep focusing on myself and do me ect. blah blah blah I guess theres not one thing I can be told that one person or another hasnt told me. with all this being said and done. is there anything that anyone can tell me or give me adive on to get him back at all? i feel desperate but understand I must be patient. he even told me I wanted him to be a christian and he didnt want to which I responded with thats ok im opened minded now and will follow you and of course nothing work. also he said like if he put most of the work in ther relationship but said we were both at fault for this not working. idk what to do or think. I really miss him and want him back. i miss him like crazy. anyone? ugh thanks:-(
also be honest do ya think I have a chance at getting him back? :'( ugh my life is over :'(
so I have no idea now if hes going out with her or not but do think there may be something going on there. why does he want to hang out with these people when he knows they’re hypocrites and he would never hang out with anyone or cared for my family before. ugh I want him back so bad 🙁
Aamls it feels so sad to hear all this. But what he said seems like he hasn’t healed from your break up. He still has his anger issues and his defence are still up high. He cannot take the fact that you cheated on him off his head. He is frustrated from you and your relationship. Thats why he wants to end it. If he really wanted to end it, he wouldn’t give you mixed signals. Just stay away from him!
if you want an honest answer then I think you might have to sign the papers, but I still think you can get him back!
Give him the space and most importantly GO GET A JOB FIRST. Get your life on the track. When he’ll see how good you’re doing may be then he’ll realise what he’s missing!
But for that, you need to get you r life sorted. You need to be happy without him..” move on without moving on”
It will make you feel better about the situation and he might give it a thought again!
Don’t ever talk about it. It will take time.Do not depend on him for anything. Get yourself in a better position and it will also give him time to clear off his head. You had bad memories which are taking more time than usual to fade away as you both being in constant contact!
Why don’t you go on a vacation?
Can you live with someone else other than his mother?That is some excellent advise divjun has gave you. Move on with your life and leave the door open to the one you love. You can’t change the situation right now, but things can always change.
If hes dating someone else, it might help you getting him back. He will remember the good things about you.
Dont let him ruin your life and happiness. You deserve happiness.
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