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So, me & my ex have been broken up for atleast 2 weeks now. We dated for 9 months, lived together for 5 months. 2 weeks ago she decided to tell me that she wasn’t in love with me anymore & that she wasn’t happy, she “loves” me and “cares” about me but she’s not in love with me. In the beginning of the relationship it wasn’t that hard, well I only saw her on weekends because she lives an hour away from me, but it wasn’t that bad of a drive. We were both so happy & just completely in love. We move in together after 4 months of dating.. yes I know that’s the first mistake. In the beginning of living together she started to get upset and down a lot because she missed her family, but I drove her out every weekend so she can see them & I mean every weekend. Things started to get better, but we would get into stupid arguments over nothing a lot. So im going to cut to the chase now, one weekend she went out to her friends house to have a girls weekend & was invited to a bachelorette party, before she went to her friends house she saw her parents. She told me after I picked her up that her & her mom had a talk & her mom was saying that “your guy’s personality’s clash, they don’t meet” and something like “you two wont last, & your not good for eachother”. Answer me this question, who is to say especially her mom that were not good for eachother? if everyone listened to that nonsense a lot of us would probably be divorced (which most are) & alone. Now when I picked her up after the weekend ended, its like everything changed? I would look at her throughout the week & or get a vibe & my face would go numb like she has lost all feeling for me? now we had a big talk on the sunday and told eachother we would try and make a change & work on things together, like going out & doing things, cooking, cleaning.. etc. Thursday night after we got back from the park. I asked her honestly if she feels the same way about me as she did before.. she started bawling her eyes out telling me no & that she cant keep trying to push those feelings if they aren’t there. I begged and pleaded for her to try and work things out and take it “day by day” as she said she would earlier that week. I know that’s another mistake of me begging for her to stay, but I do love her, and she has changed me in so many ways.. I don’t hate her, I don’t wish her an unhappy life. I just want to know if I should go along with this no contact rule, will it work? I have no idea. She has made an album on FB with pictures of us & naming the album “Another chapter closed forever”. Am I wrong to have hopes that we can find our way back to eachother again, is it wrong that im hurting everyday because of this? Advice please 🙁
her mom was wrong in giving her that advise, and I agree with you on that, but as a mom she of course wants whats best for her daughter. she however has the last say. when my husband and i first start going out ect, his mother hated me, I just knew it, now I’m living in her apartment, lol, comes to show you people and circumstances change. I’d say to do no contact and then slowly start doing those things you use to do when you first met her and started going out. you need to re-romance her again. meaning doing things you use to do for her that made her fall for you. for now give her her space and you take this time to grow and improve yourself. then you contact her and start contacting her again. I think you definitely have a very high chance of getting her back. good luck and don’t give up hope, you got this. 🙂 @cassie what do you think of this?
Thank you for taking out the time to write back I appreciate it. But do you think the only way “out” was for her to say she wasn’t in love with me anymore? And that she wasn’t happy? I haven’t contacted her since Sunday but I did post an album like she did of pictures of us and I titled the album “to old memories, and to new ones ahead” does that break no contact? I did that on Tuesday
& she hasn’t even bothered to contact me at all & it feels like she never cared about us or wanted to give it a chance, she just told me that she didn’t wanna push those feelings if they weren’t there, she didn’t wanna give me “false hope”. It’s just really hard to deal with right now & it’s not that easy to just hang out with her, if I ever did contact her again, on weekends ya sure, but can we ever get back to where we were or am I giving myself false hope? I love her so much 🙁
no problem, my pleasure, no I dont think that at all. I think that she needs her space for a while. I like the album idea. but dont take it to far. I dont think it breaks no contact because you havent spoken to her. She may not contact you at all but you must be patient and start working on where you went wrong and go from there. I know those feelings and apparently for what im seeing from everyones post we all feel those same ways, @clear @cassie, right? I guess its normal. I think you stand a big chance actually. give her time work on yourself and as hard as it sounds be patient and give yourself time to do something. get a hobby or something to keep yourself entertain in the mean time.
I agree with @aamls! 🙂
I’ve been going to the gym & the casino. I joined the gym after we broke up. I’ll try my hardest & not give up, but idk if it’ll get me anywhere 🙁 thanks guys.
Hey sorry, I tryed called up friends to go out but turns out I’m sitting here at the coffee shop alone & decided to go through the pictures of us & it’s just so hard, I miss her so much & I just want her to miss me to & tell me that she made a mistake but I’m afraid that it will never happen 🙁 I really love this girl & I know I got to follow all these rules but I can’t focus on myself if I don’t know if she isn’t thinking about me or not 🙁 I wish I could go back and change my mistakes, I just don’t know what to do anymore & I’m almost in tears.. Sorry to be such a bother.. I just really need someone to talk to.
sorry was having some problems yesterday. I hope your ok. what did you end up doing? she will and most likely does miss you, so calm down. and those are normal feelings to feel. you really need to find something to do or friends and family for support or you will find yourself going crazy. if your stalking her, stop it now as your only hurting yourself by doing so. go out and have fun, even if you already went to the gym go walking or running when you feel those ways. at first no contact is the hardest, then it starts to get better. just keep calm. 🙂
I think for right now she needs space from you. There is no doubt that she is missing you and it seems as though you havent done anything to wrong her. Just give her some space right now. There’s always hope! 🙂
Well tonight im going to the casino with my dad..i guess it will for some time get her off my mind, but once everything stops then reality kicks in & shes just back on my mind. I keep looking at my phone for a text or a msg on facebook or anything from her, but im just waiting around for nothing. I wanna focus on myself soo much, but only when I get a text or anything from her it will get easier.. cause then I know she does miss me.. iv’e been in no contact for 6 days today, I just want it to get easier! :l
Like I said the last time
I made contact, and the last thing I said was – You asked me in the beginning, if I was ready to move in. And I said yes? I asked you the same thing, and you also said yes. Why didn’t you say no & just give it time? And she said.. – I don’t know. I’m sorry I don’t have an answer for that. And all I said to that was “so am I”. And that was it. Tomorrow will be a week of no contact! I’m starting to have abit more hope than I did, all I have to say is I can’t thank you guys enough for being here for a complete stranger, and I’m glad I found this site. I’ll give you more updates in time. Thank you so much again.im glad your feeling better and have hope. 🙂 its a roller coaster ride but you can do it, and glad to be able to help. if one person from here can get their ex back from being helped then its worth it, hopefully everyone could but unfortunately its not realistic. 🙂 I already lost hope to get my husband back. 🙁 it sucks and I feel horrible today :-(. yeah keep us posted. 🙂
So I’m on my way to bed. Got back from the casino with my dad, didn’t win anything but still had a good time. I just have one question, do you honestly think she is still thinking about me or misses me at all, it feels like she has forgot about me. I mean cause she hasn’t texted me at all, is she playing the same game? I know she needs time and s
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