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Posts
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Thanks everyone I appreciate the response. I worry about her and don’t want to see her hurt and your mind can run wild with ideas to alleviate that pain. As u once did for her or being the knight in shining armour and how it may change things between us. But I know not contacting her is the best idea for not only her, but myself. It is just nice to hear it from other people to rid yourself of as much doubt as u can. The mind can really play tricks on a person, as I think we all know.
Amy – It’s nice u can still be friends with the sister. But I wouldn’t ask or talk too much about your ex. If your seeking answers from her she may be put off as she doesn’t want to be in the middle. And it could effect your friendship. Lin has said it perfectly in her post as to how to be. And how to react if your ex comes up. U never know she may volunteer information without u asking and not even realize it.
As for how long it took before certain feelings went away …..well everyone is different and I found time and support really helped the process. Because it is a process one goes through after a break up.Lin – I commend u in being able to see your faults and seek help with them. And to better yourself for it. You are right, it is not usually one person to blame, but both in certain ways. It is tough to come to that realization though for people.
Kiya – good luck with your meet up today. Let us know how it goes.
I figured out why I wasn’t seeing anything the box that said email me about replies wasnt checked, i swore it was lol so i should be ok now.
Also i did a bad thing.. i went OFF on my ex through text, literally im over it with him. I was trying i really was. I also was trying to be positive and understanding but there is only so much someone can take plus why am i trying to change so much for someone who doesn’t even have the respect to text back..we were supposed to meet yesterday and so when he texted me the time i waited and waited plus I called and NOTHING.. the polite thing couldve been to let me know!.not ignore me.. so yes yal i was pissed and i probably ruined everything hes a jerk and im not about to sit around and play this game with him….
Yikes. That’s awful and totally disrespectful. I wouldn’t be so worried about going off c honestly it doesn’t seem like he’s someone whose opinion should be of high importance. I’m sorry that happened, but it probably felt good to let the anger out a bit. If I were you, I wouldn’t beat myself up about it; that’s extremely rude.
On my end, after just over two weeks of no contact I am suddenly unblocked on social media. Not trying to read too much into such things, he probably just wants to be able to check up on me. He probably knows I noticed too because I don’t post often and all of a sudden all the photos he tagged me in were back. I’m sticking to no contact, but it’s good to know I’m still popping up in his mind
Amy,
Did you already have your meet up with the sister? It makes me a little nervous; I feel like exes frequently assume things are about them even if they’re not. Don’t blow of his sister but in the future Id try to keep contact to a minimum because Lin is right, she’s repeating everything. That’s what I would do for my brother– I love his girlfriend but he’s my family.Kiya, I’m so sorry that’s the worst! You didn’t do anything bad. I would be absolutely furious if someone did that to me! Did he just not show up with zero explanation?
Definitely take a step back for a bit. I don’t blame you for saying your piece but I think you need to get away from him for a while now and do NC again.
I can’t believe he would do that though?! It’s so rude!
Palmtrees, it felt great and I literally have no remorse. He may never talk to me again now and im probably going to be the crazy ex but idc anymore yea thats 8 yrs of my life wasted but its taught me so much also and what I deserve..if honestly rather hurt now and get over it then to keep on with this and getting hurt more..so who knows what will happen..also thats great! Baby steps you know. I will say if you post anything make sure it’s awesome to where he’s like oh wow she’s doing great. Are you doing ok with the nc?
Lin, exactly! It’s very rude texting takes all but 2 seconds especially in this day in age… but nope absolutely nothing at all..thats what gets me the most not the not showing up part,but the not answering after YOU set up a time and place and not have the decency to say hey i cant make it..instead having me up there looking crazy..but oh yes i deleted his number and his moms number so if she texts me i hope she dont get mad when i say..who is this?
Some days are easier than others. Yesterday work was really killing me so when I noticed he unblocked me my first thought was “please don’t reach out to me right now because I am not ready” So I am trying to keep that in mind. As much as I miss him, the trust is worn and the rest of my life is out of whack and I need to learn to be a little more self centered
Sorry just catching up on reading these.
I cannot believe that!! That is completely inappropriate and rude – i probably would have gone off on one too! Its completely unfair on you, so don’t feel bad.
I decided to meet up with his sister tomorrow and see if she says anything – I will however act cheerful and happy, however I didn’t know whether to say I was still unsure of the break up as i thought he was really happy and he didn’t say that there was a problem with anything….I dna :/
Palmtress nice that your unblocked now – obviously someone was starting to be a bit nosy and wondering what you were up to! 🙂
Kiya – I’m sorry to hear that. There is no excuse for standing someone up. Especially in the current situation. I’m glad u showed him u won’t tolerate being treated that way at any point! He obviously has stuff on his end to deal with, to do that to u. So take solace knowing it’s not because of u. I was wondering If he responded to any of your text when u were upset with him?
Palmtree – it’s a good sign he unblocked u. It shows he is thinking about and wondering what u are up to. I caution not to put too much out of the norm or try to send suggestive stuff on your social media or stalk his for lack of a better term(I still have moments of this and it drives me crazy). It sounds like u are in a decent place to know your not ready to see him and want to regain control of your life. And trying to get to that point where your comfortable and confident when the time comes.
Amy – I guess u play it by the conversation. But only if she brings it up. I would try not to even ask about him to be honest. I know it will be hard as your seeking answers. But I don’t know if she is the one to get them from. Your there to catch up with a good friend and The whole idea is if she does tell her brother anything it’s that your doing really well (hopefully about the positive changes your doing) and that u didn’t really ask much about him. That will get him thinking more then anything else. Good luck!
That was awesome advice soupy.. i agree that will probably make him to thinkto think about you so much more. Who knows he might know shes meeting you and ask her to ask you questions..but good luck tomorrow i cant wait to hear about it.
Palmtrees you are doing so good it takes a strong person to realize what they need to do within themselves even though they are hurting
Soupy it was hard doing that honestly im just getting so frustrated with Trying and yes all he said was “my bad i got busy”.. no emotion to that msg at all. So i just text him back saying ok.. and he hasn’t said anything so i guess thats it for a while
That’s very true-I will let you all know If anything is said. I’ve also been told my ex still has me tagged in the relationship on Facebook-still! Just ignoring it now though.
Kiya-definately leave it now. Has he got you on social media? Go out with friends, take photos, show it hasn’t phased you.
Same with you palmtrees22! Now that he’s unblocked you it’s the prime opportunity to show him what he’s missing!It’s really nice to hear he has unblocked you. My ex still has me blocked I think. I don’t really try to check anymore. Ive honestly kind of have lost track of how many days I’ve been in no contact. I just know next Wednesday will be 2 months and that is also my birthday. I have stuff planned that day so hopefully nothing will upset me much. And then the next 2 days after that would be our 10 months if we were still together but I’m going to be on vacation that day.
I really think having him block me was good on my part because I can’t see all of his stuff and get hurt by it but the only bad thing is, he probably doesn’t want to see anything of me and he can’t see how good stuff is.
Sorry to hear about how your ex blew you off like that Kiya, just prove to him he is really stupid. And I wish you luck as you go out with your ex’s sister tomorrow Amy!
Amy he had me on social media before i deactivated my account but i havent been on in so long i doubt it..do you have youryour outfit and everything picked out?
Catherine..honestly the fact that you arent really keeping track shows how much your progressing! Which is good..i hope you have a great birthday
And its ok i just feel like im back at square one after i have gotten so far i have to resist the urge to not text him again…its so so hard
Maybe you could give his number to a close friend and you delete it off your phone. I think this advice was given to Lin earlier. It will help with it, unless you have his number memorized lol. But all you can do is try again in a month.
But yeah I hope I do have a great birthday, I plan on keeping myself very occupied. I kind of hope he doesn’t text me happy birthday so it doesn’t bring me down but then I do at the same time. It sounds kinda weird I know. If he does say happy birthday, I’m not sure if I should ignore it or just say a simple thanks.
I know this hasn’t even happened yet and it may not even happen but what to you all think?
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