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Hey, thanks for the responses and input!
I understand the importance of NC it’s just sometimes I find myself trying to find holes in its logic so that I can have an excuse to break it haha. She tried texting me a couple times the other day saying that she’s doing really good in work but I didn’t respond. Or are we suppose to respond to those sorts of things for positive encouragement? I understand the not talking about relationships, feelings and the sort but are we suppose to respond with positive reinforcement to things like her doing good at work or do I just stay laying low?
Also, I have a giant human sized stocking that has a couple gifts in it, that I was going to give her for Christmas but I’m not sure if that’s going against anything either haha. That and if I do give it to her then that means I’ll have to break NC and meet up with her for, hopefully, only 5 minutes or so. I figured that after that I would restart my 30 day NC and just have to tough it out through new years.
Anyways, thanks for the input and responces. It’s really helpful to hear this stuff coming from people in similar situationsRebounds are nothing more than a shitty attempt at getting what you and him had. He was lonely and too scared to be on his own so instead of dealing with the break up by himself, he tried to find someone else to find the void that you left. When he got with these girls he was probably trying to speed things along to the level that you and he were at so that he could feel comfortable again, if they really meant anything more to him than he wouldn’t have chosen to come back to you. He obviously feels comfortable with you enough and missed what you two shared enough to come back.
You should talk to him about how you feel, if he’s serious then he’ll listen to what you have to say. Build you’re relationship on trust. As typical and over said as that sounds its the truth. If not you’ll hold little things against him forever and if you ever have an argument you may end up randomly blurting out something that has nothing to do with the situation in an attempt to gain the upper hand. Don’t let it come to this. Honesty shows compassion and trust.I’d say if you found yourself in that position where you she was near you and pretending she didn’t see you, go up to her and say hi. Don’t be weird or like all awkward and whatnot. Pretend you saw a buddy of yours, or even their parents somewhere. You know, someone who you have a neutral connection with and you’re just saying hi. keep it short and be cool. It’ll show confidence. Even make up an agenda that you have to leave for, let her know that you’re still out there doing things with you’re life and being happy. Chicks dig that, everyone does. If you just sit there and pretend to not see the other person both of you will know that the other is still being weird about it. Show confidence and give her something to look up to 🙂
Honesty is where it’s at. And this is all really simple for me to say behind a keyboard and screen but I’m sure if I was in your, and I may be if things with my ex go well, it would be hard for me to do to. You’ll just have to come up with a way to ask her to be honest with you. The person she’s talking to could just be a thing to try and make you jealous, like a little revenge for NC with her. Everyone’s different and you’ll honestly be the best judge of character for how to ask her.
With my girl, if/when we fix things, I’m gonna lay it all out on the table. let her have the password to my phone, Facebook, everything except amazon. It’s not that its necessary but its more of a sign of trust. Talk to her about how you feel and ask her who the person is. The worst thing you could do is ignore it and let it fester and bother you. You may even find yourself trying to use it as something against her in an argument and she’ll show you it was nothing and all that worrying and fear of her commitment was nothing more than a misunderstanding.
Idk, I don’t really feel like my advice is the best since i’m in a similar situation but anything helps right? All I can say and I know its 100% is build your relationships foundation on trust. It’s key. If you’re not comfortable with something, express it to her, just do it wisely and try not to be accusing.
