Why is he doing this?

Long story, cut very short. My ex and I dated for 3 years. We broke up in October. For a couple months we barely talked. I took the break up really hard and also was dealing with issues at the time. He started to come around on the holidays. We got intamite once in a while. However he barely texted me and a that, so I know he was using me even though I knew he still had feelings for me (we were each others first loves). I never really gave up on him.

Then we started trying to be friends. But still didn’t text me as much. So I laid it on the line that he either takes things slow with me or leaves my life forever. He decided to take things slow. We did that for about a week in a half. He texted me all the time (wasn’t really flirtacious just contently) and he threw out one I love you.

Then he throws on me that he “just wants to be friends”. Well I never wanted to be his friend so I know he was doing that for himself. He then proceeded to tell me that he wants me to go out and date other people because I haven’t and how do I really know hhe’s the one if I have only been with one person. I agreed and respected his decision. He told me that he wants me in his future and he sees me in his future.

Well we are friends for a week, but on valentines day he just pushed my buttons (he wished me a happy valentines day but was with another girl that night). So I didn’t talk to him for an entire week. He called me twice that week and then texted me on a Friday and told me to act like an adult and text him back. Well I didn’t and then he called me hours later. I answered and then we texted a little after that and then he stopped. Well he found out I was at a party that night and texted me to get all my pictures and shit or he is burning them. I called him and we had a nice talk.

His cousin is my best friend, so we see each other. He texted me on Tuesday telling me to go home because her family needs a break. Well she went to her dad and told him that and he went to her mom and told her how dare he try to control his house and she needs to talk to him. Well she was on the edge anyways to confront him about me. So she finally did. She told me they had a nice talk. I called him later that evening and he answered “Don’t ever fucking talk to me again” I called him again because I was done with his crap and I have never stood up to him. His sister answers and said that he can’t come to the phone right now even though she was in the car with him and their parents. Then, he grabs the phone and tells me to never talk to him again. So I showed up at his house because we needed to end things for good in person.

Well when he came home, he chucked his left overs and shoved me because I told him we need to talk. I shoved him back (out of pure rage) and then we started screaming at each other. He told me I ruined his life, he wasted three years of his life, he wants me gone forever, I’m psycho, I need to go kill myself (I have a history with suicide), that when he told me he loved me it was because that’s what I wanted to hear, that he’s screwed 4 girls since we broke up, mocked me for personal issues, and how he doesn’t care what happens to me. Also, he and his boss slept together. Well coorprate found out and told them to never see each other again or they will get fired. Well, that’s who he was with on Valentines Day. Then he proceeded to tell me how she wrote “I love you” on a piece of paper and it is in his room.

So after that confrontation we said our goodbyes for good and I was in complete shock. I woke up the next morning with a text saying this :I am sorry about tonight. I have been running off 6 hours of sleep in 2 days.. You know how that is. I just want you to know that I am very very disappointed in myself… We have to go separate ways. I wouldn’t ever hit you I was to aggressive to even lay my hands on you. I’m a shitty person for it and won’t live itdown. So again I’m sorry for everything I ruined in our lives and I’m glad you found someone better. If something would of happen to you id be there. I don’twant to end on bad terms. Today was one of the worst days of my life and again I’m not happy with my decision. It has happened and I can’t take it back but tolearn from it. Hope you will forgive me one day if not I understand. Hope you have a great life with everything! Don’t let anyone stop you from your dreams. Ifyou can remember anything from me let it be this… It doesn’t matter how slow you go, as long as you don’t stop at what you want to achieve. Have a great timewith everything you do and only surround yourself around happy go lucky people. Stay positive!Ps.. I hope you don’t hate me.”

I never responded. I got a text later saying “Pss. Let me know if you read this.” I never responded. Then that night I got a message request from him on Instagram. I denied the request. Well, I woke up this morning 18 canceled calls (blocked his number from calling), 1 missed call from a different number, and 1 text. He called me twice at 7:52 and I didn’t answer then he texted me at that same time and said “Okay I get it.” Then I got 15 more calls. 1 call from a random number. And then another call from his.

Why is he so desperate to contact me? After everything he said and did? After basically using me? After still seeing his boss? After saying “I just told you what you wanted to hear? After 4 months of putting me through this hellish roller coaster ride? Why is he trying to contact me?