-
Posts
-
AndyK,
I agree with everyone have said. It is better not to ask anything about your ex, just focus on yourself during your NC period.Update alert:
After 42 days of NC I finally spoke with my ex. We ran into each other and said hi. She seemed to be comfortable talking to me since I didn’t really say much but she pretty much started the conversation. We talked for a while. Well she did, she was rambling about what’s been new in her life. She also brought up that she received my letter. She was anxious to know what was new at work (I wrote something about getting good news at work) so I told her everything new. That was about it on that subject. I tried to end the conversation but she kept talking. After she was done with everything she had to say she ended the conversation and we went our separate ways. Overall we had a casual conversation. Nothing else. She didn’t meantiom anything about the guy she’s been seeing. I’m not sure what to think about this experience. One more thing, as we talked she did meantion that she’s learned to not expect anything from a relationship now..than she said awkward let’s talk next subject. I know she didn’t mean to get into that, I know her, she just ended up saying that accidentally then figured that it was probably not a good idea to say it. We texted a little bit after that then we left things at that.
What do you guys think?
Dear LA,
Good luck fri, I know you’ll get positive response. However you’ll get it or not, I know you are good and you’ll be ok as you already prepare for both positive and negative responses. Are you exciting now ? I’m so exciting for you now. Don’t forget to share us as soon as you get something update.
Dear julia,
Rebound is just like he is looking for you in his new gf. That’s mean you are better. For example, if we hear a good songs from radio, we just try to remember the lyrics, search in google and listen to it again and again like 50 times. After that, no more want to listen up. Like that, if he is in honeymoon state, he is so happy, he may even think this new gf is better than you( The grass is greener ) . But after honeymoon state. ( The grass is no more greener ) and i’m sure he will crawl back to you if you really did good on him before. Man usually go according to his emotion. There are things that you can check whether it is rebound or not.
(1) If he choose someone really opposite than you. ( he likes gals with goal in life, gals who don’t wear shorts but just after break up with you, he choose gals who don’t have goals in life, who wear shorts . Because he thinks that he will be happy if he choose really opposite of you. He just test it. )
(2) If he jump into this relationship just after broke up with you. ( he may hate to be single and he may try to get the points that he’ve got with you from Long relationship.)
(3) If he try to rub your face off. ( he pose something on his fb wall, like photos with his new or status like ” Will you love me forever ? ” , “Will you walk with me till end ? ” , “Will you follow with me if I move to other country” which concerned with his new gf ) . It is probably rebound.But the longer he is in this new relationship, the less it can be rebound. If he is in this relationship over a year, this RS may be really solid to him.
I hope so, my ex is in rebound , too. However, I need to improve myself. Both physically and mentally. I know we are good and we can do it.
” If there is a will, there is a way “
Dear LA,
I think It’s a good response.
” One more thing, as we talked she did meantion that she’s learned to not expect anything from a relationship now..than she said awkward let’s talk next subject. ”According to that words she said, I think her relationship may not go well. She want to tell you that but she stop as she may think that she shouldn’t tell you about that. But it’s really good sign , dude. You even tried to end the conversation .. Proud of you ! I think she knows now that you’re not always available for her. Carry on and just update to us. 🙂
Any opinion for LA ? plz reply.
Hi everyone
Sunshingirl – Great work on finishing your exam. Don’t worry if you still think about your ex from time to time. That’s normal in my books, to be honest I still think about my ex everyday. You just can’t lose an intense emotional attachment overnight. Memories are powerful too
L.A – You have a great attitude. 42 days is a top notched effort. Good on you for keeping things simple with your Ex and that’s good that she mentioned the letter. I wouldn’t read into it at this stage. As you said it was an accidental meeting so there probably is not hidden agenda in her words. Keep focusing on you.
Hayyyyy yo !! Today is my 30 days of NC. I’m good. 🙂
(I won’t be good if i haven’t fris like you guys and Kevin)Thank you so much fris .
thanks everyone, i’ll try my best to focus on myself and not on her during NC!
Khine, if guys usually go according to their emotions, how about girls? do y’all tend to be more logical? and like how?
After 40+ days of NC I made a stupid mistake AGAIN. And broke the NC, well I didn’t really talked to her but I ended up stalking again and found out that she’s into this online social dating(?) called Tinder and met a few people. I don’t if I’ll feel okay with knowing that like hey she’s trying to fill the emptiness by meeting up and talking to this strangers or she really has moved on and ready to meet and commit to a relationship. It’ll be our 3 month break up tomorrow. And I still missing her badly every waking day. Man, this is really difficult and I don’t know how to handle ot. It’s my first and god I’m so unsure if I want to get back with her or just forget about it and move on.
So I’m planning on texting my ex today letting her know that it was nice running into her yesterday.
I have a lot of mix feeling and I’m not sure what to think. So some feedback in what I maybe going through is welcome.
When I saw my ex yesterday it cought me off guard. But when I was talking to her I felt like she changed the person she was with me when we were together. She seemed more into herself and a little bratty. I actually felt a little annoyed as she rambled about what’s been new. I also glanced at her physic and I wasn’t attracted. She admitted to not working out or running as much. After our conversation I felt like I didn’t know her. She was just another person. I felt bad becuase I used to love her and would enjoy being with her every second. What happened???
After that I texted her about a couple things that happened while we were at the gym. (We got parking tickets). Our conversation was 6 messages long then over. It felt dry.
Something inside of me wants to keep talking to her because I still care or the rest wasn’t attracted to what I saw and heard.
In addition, I feel like she’s trying to move on. Yesterday she seemed interested to know what’s new but I feel like that’s just the work of the letter and becuase it’s been almost 2 months..also her tone and attitude, it was like when we were going through our break up stage. I didn’t like it. I absolutly hate it.
I’m going to contact her today. Hopefully we talk longer. I have a hard time being patient. I want to know already if there’s a chance or not of winning her again. I don’t want to get hurt again so I’m not putting my hopes up.
Athens,
I wish I could find the exact words to make you feel better. Maybe cause I almost face the same situation. I broke up 3 an a half months ago and begun NC a month ago. And damn it is so hard!
I wouldn’t say you broke your NC plan. I mean you didn’t initiate a contact with her so you are fine. I kind of check my ex’s FB profile sometimes and I know I shouldn’t. But it’s ok. I call it a minor slip-up.
And yes there are days where you wonder if this is all worth it. You are the only one who can give this answer. If you love her deeply no matter what, then I say you stay strong and fight it. But first you have to face your demons and become a confident person because that what she wants to see in the end.
We can do this!Julia your comment gives me strength!
“yes there are days where you wonder if this is all worth it. You are the only one who can give this answer. If you love her deeply no matter what, then I say you stay strong and fight it. But first you have to face your demons and become a confident person because that what she wants to see in the end.
We can do this!”Thank you!
LA,
That’s a tough call there. I mean you were feeling all these things while she was talking to you, which most of them are not that positive, and yet you want to know if there is a chance to win her back. You mean you will ask her? I think you should ask yourself first. Do you really want her back in your life? I am only asking cause you weren’t that attracted to her. I would recommend you wait a bit longer (like a day or two) before you contact her. And then see what your gut feeling tells you..;)
LA –
I was about to reply you but I just saw Julia’s comment and I totally agree with her. 🙂Wait one day or two and figure out how you really feel about getting back with her since you weren’t attracted to her.
Good luck!
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.