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Posts
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Yeah, it’s definitely a benefit.. With both of you having your own “space” there won’t be that pressure to have to force the relationship to work.. If things seem like they are taking a turn towards being argumentative or falling back into old routines, you both have a place to retreat to so that things can cool down, which you really didn’t have before.
Don’t worry about the Tinder thing, right now probably like me (no I’m not on Tinder) I’m on POF it’s more of a confidence booster. I wouldn’t act upon any of the replies or “hook up” it’s nice to know that somebody shows an interest in me. That is more than likely what he’s using it for as well and he’s getting to the point where he realizes that this may not necessarily be what he’s looking for..
All this evening I’ve been feeling restless though. Whilst these things seem positive I can’t shake the negative feeling that things won’t even happen again. I mean I am surprised when he offered friendship as I thought he would try and separate himself from me fully for good now. However I have seen on fb this evening that he’s going to his friends bands event which is nice. However this is the same band he tagged a little 20 year old tart to so she could have a listen. She’s someone from his work who he just became friends with obviously. He doesn’t normally become friends wkth many people from work so this has be concerned. He’s either gonna have a nice out for fun, take this little chick along or meet someone out both of which are not great options. The gig is next weekend so it’s not like I have room to really make a move as it really will take a lot
Longer. However I am wondering about this little 20 year old. She doesn’t look like me at all and is all into makeup and looks a bit trashy tbh. And if he thinks I’m young and immature then lord haha.
And JAM I think you will find someone else. You seem lovely to be honest and I appreciate your help 🙂Yeah, you can’t be concerned with the possibilities of this one random chick..
I just had to watch my ex leave a bar with three random guys the other day, all of which she became friends with on FB the next morning. Along with one of them posting on her wall about how he slipped his number into her purse.. 🙁
You have to treat it as nothing.. I became friends with about 6 women in the past month, invited 3 of them to my party on Saturday night.. Did it mean anything? Nope.. Because none of them showed.. So, just because he tagged her and maybe invited her.. Is she going to show? More than likely no..
Yeah but she’s freaking 20 years old. Thats an 11 year difference. I know some people can make that age difference work, for example you did but this chick doesn’t look like she has the maturity or class. What makes you think she wouldn’t show up if he invited her though. While he may not be the most attractive man out there he is charming.
I wish there was a way to speed this up so I know for sure whether he wants to get back together or not cause i’m tired of just sitting her hoping :(. I feel like i don’t have a good chance but a couple of things he’s done have made me feel otherwise
Unfortunately.. The hope is what ends up getting you, especially now when he’s starting to show signs of interest, where as before he wasn’t..
I agree.. I wish I could speed up time as well..
Don’t worry about the “Girl” she’s just a distraction right now to your goal.. Push that aside or it will cloud your judgment..
Well your ex seems to be pretty public about her going out and meeting other men and if my ex were doing that that would help me hate him a lot quicker haha. But from what he’s indicated to me he just said he’s drinking a lot of beer, playing a lot of playstation and watching netflix like crazy.
I’m trying to forget about her like not to be nasty but if he wants to go after her then I guess I wasn’t as great as he said I was. What makes you think my situation is different to those who don’t get their exes back :/. I didn’t think he would offer friendship at all this time especially when he knew what the friendship meant to me last time and yet he still did
It’s his way of staying close to you, without putting himself out there emotionally..
The hug.. Then the hug again.. The consoling you, it just seems different.. I thought that I had the same thing as you going, but I opened my mouth and did some crazy things that pushed her further away..
I’m just trying to advise you better than what I did.. Because I know that I was close and ruined it all based upon my actions..
Yeah in his text after we met he said how hard it was and it was difficult to keep it together. I’m not happy he’s out there chatting to other women possibly doing more with them but i understand he’s entitled to I guess I would just like to know if he’s just trying to fill the void until he realises he does want to be with me. I’m not really a plan b kind of girl if his other options don’t work out.
So we’ve met up, I’ve sent him a cute text that in a way lets him know i’m thinking of him and now i’m just going to let him be. Do you think he will contact me himself in the next week or so ? Before I sent my text last week asking for my money back we hadn’t talked in 2 weeks and thats when he suggested the meet up. However in 2 weeks he has his interview so I know I will definitely send him a text wishing him well and would also like him to call me and tell me about it after but thats probably too much. Do you think waiting for him the next week is a good plan and that he might contact me ? Otherwise any other suggestions
Keep doing what you’re doing.. Let it progress naturally if you force it upon him you’ll push him away like I did to my ex.. I know you want it to hurry up, but time will fix everything..
Keep a positive attitude, and think positively that it will indeed work out for you.. It’s not a matter of if, as much as it is a matter of when.. Hold on to that and you’ll be fine..
Hahah I wish I shared your positivity JAM but thanks so much for your help. Your ex is a fool haha you seem wonderful 🙂 I hope we both meet someone great soon enough. I sometimes wish I could meet a man that just makes me forget about my ex because he’s so wonderful. Lol not happening and even if Im on tinder I doubt it will happen on there. Lol when I saw my ex on there I matched him. But I delete it and then bring it back then delete it again I don’t know what I wsnt haha. Hopefully this next week and so on I’ll be on my exes mind after our meeting this week
Yeah, I hear that from everybody else as well.. They say that she’ll regret all of it eventually and these are all women. But she is so strong minded and stubborn. Even if she wants to be back she’ll stick by her decision..
Even though I have opportunities to move on, I keep ignoring them just due to the fact I don’t want to have any regrets later on..
Well you and I seem like the kind of people to not go out there and slut it up even though we think that may help us or whatever. I think its good we’re not out there advertising ourselves like our exes as in the long run we will be better off emotionally when it comes to a future relationship as we have let ourselves deal with the emotions even though it sucks and seems never ending right haha.
Also if you were a girl and my ex added you and most of the photos over the last year and a half have been tagged by me or uploaded by him and have me in them would that be confronting to you as a new lady. Cause obviously we women are big stalkers haha. I know i did that when i got together with him but there was barely any trace of his ex on there.
I would be more concerned if he actually removed himself from being tagged in photo’s.. Because that would mean that he’s trying to cover up or hide the fact that he was with you..
I always expected my ex to do that. But I know that she doesn’t really care what other people think.. She would just explain it off as it’s her past and has nothing to do with the now or the future..
Yeah I don’t know if my ex is just not the type of guy to remove all the photos of his past till he’s truly moved on as he had a few with his ex still on there but nothing major like us. He still has all the main photos from our trip away last year and the only photos on his instagram were because i was in them pretty much and they’re still up. I don’t know if it actually means anything though ? I deleted photos of him last year but only profile pics which had him in them I still kept our travel photos up. I also have just relised the photo he has as his profile pic now is one i took and tagged of him from our overseas trip last year.
Ugh I hate this just going through our photos and I realise the great times we had and how much i miss him and stuff. Can I actually ever get him back :/
Yeah, when I search my Ex on Facebook.. The first pic is the Facebook announcement with a picture of both of us that says “Just got engaged” I’m not sure why that’s the first one, because there are other things that happened afterwards.. It’s just weird how Facebook organizes things.. Because that was two years ago.. Just makes it worse when you look at it.. Lol..
My ex is not a real big Facebook person though.. She’s a “like’r” she doesn’t and hasn’t posted anything on there since the split.. Except for one photo that she used as her wallpaper of a picture she took in Niagara Falls when we lived in New York.. She’ll occasionally respond to someone else’s posts but that’s rare as well..
You’ll get him back!! The most important thing is that you learn from the experience and that you work harder to make sure that things don’t ever go back to the way they were. I know that if this were ever the case for me, I would take every opportunity to ensure that things go the right way this time..
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