Lost My Ex Of 7 Years To Someone Else But Want Her Back, Please Help

Hi Emily,
I suppose technically we weren’t official together as she had said she couldn’t fully be with me until I had moved to her town with a job, but we were seeing each other a lot for “dates” and speaking on the phone all the time. She would always enquire about how the job hunting was going and occasionally get frustrated about the time it was taking. We were always talking about being together again and me dealing with my issues (which I was) so we could have a more stable future.

I think your right about this new info if anything it will hopefully enable her to see through him quicker. I got a message from her brother this morning saying he can’t work out what she’s up to and won’t listen to him, and that sounds like typical rebound behaviour to me…

Ed

Hi Emily,
I would say lonely rather than impatient, as we were living in different towns and I work shifts which made it harder to visit,and I know she was scared of being hurt yet again. she really had a lot of love for me which she did tell me and a friend of mine on a facebook message.
All I can do is wait and hope it ends sooner rather than later, its just knowing she is with someone else is the worst pain ever.

After a rough morning (I’m still not sleeping) I have decided to see what comes of the letter and make a continued determined effort on myself, later on I am going to the local Buddhist centre to try a meditation class and tonight I’m going to try a yoga class, maybe I’ll sleep after 🙂

Ed

Hi Emily,
I was prescribed really strong sleeping tablets a few weeks back, they should have knocked me out and kept me out leaving me dopey but I would only get 4 hours tops on them because of the adrenaline I’m producing, so now I’m on beta-blockers to bring that down and anti-depressants to calm my mind they should start working over the next few days. I’ve got a meditation class in a few hours so I will practise what I learned tonight.

I just had a another message from her brother saying he wished we were still together and could be together so that’s good to know he’s on my side.

Ed

Hi Emily,
It went really well, probably helped by being in a lighter mood after receiving the messages from her brother, I felt like a bit of the weight had gone from my mind and it seemed to last through the rest of the day and through the yoga class I tried in the evening, which was also very good.
As for sleeping I still woke up around 2.30 as usual but this time was only awake for
about an hour or so rather than the rest of the night, and I managed to sleep again until about 6ish, so probably the best night I’ve had In 6 weeks, hopefully it will continue.
Any news from you? Did she contact you at all?

Hi Emily,
I have no idea how I’ve been managing, I think it’s been pure adrenalin, and somehow I didn’t even look that tired even though it felt like my eyes had sunk into the back of my head 🙂 I really hope this is the start of getting back on track.

I did send the letter, after your opinion and a few of my friends ok’d it, I sent it on Monday evening so it should be there today (gulp)
I have no idea what to expect, if anything, I still think I will just need to wait it out, painful as it is.

Ed

Hi Emily,

well, she texted me, I nearly dropped my phone, she said thanks for returning her CD and asked about the new place, I admit I waited a few hours to reply as I didn’t want to appear to keen. When I did reply I played it cool and didn’t give to much away and then a minute later she texted back basically asking questions about my job and what I’d been up to, I waited about 10 mins before each reply but all of hers were within a minute of mine.

She then said “if you ever want to chat feel free to let me know or to call :-)”

And I responded “that would be really nice 🙂 maybe over the next few days, I’m heading to another yoga class shortly :-)”

“Oooh brilliant 🙂 enjoy it and speak soon then :-)”

I’m trying not to read into it too much and I never mentioned our relationship or the other guy, I’ve just got to keep my cool and see what happens.

I think I’m still in shock.

I have to admit after yesterdays high today I dropped a little low. I guess I’m trying not to over analyse what was said too much, yeah it’s great she got in touch but I’m now worried that she just wants to be friends while still seeing this guy, there’s no way I’m going to the friendzone, so I guess I’ll have to wait and see, if that is the case then it’s back to no contact again.

Hi Emily,
Your right it hasn’t happened yet. Depression is a strange thing, it punishes you when you start to feel a little better about things, The last two days have been better after talking with her brother and then with her contacting me but today just had that slight spiral to it, but reading your words definitely helped thank you, I also went to another meditation class today which helped as well.

I’ve just got back from a friends who a load of us visit every week and just found out from the one friend who my ex is in contact with that the new guy is a ex coke head, a current pot head(she detests smoking)and my ex suspects he’s back on the coke again and used the words “don’t know if this will go anywhere”, maybe that’s why she was glad to hear from me? Obviously she is still with him but hopefully starting to see through him, but again I cant allow my self to hope to much, as long as she doesn’t try to be the one to save him from himself or any of that ****.

Has there been any contact at your end today?

Thanks for putting things into perspective

Ed