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For me to not leaving him he did that I thought…so that means he didnt really love me in fact..?
I’ve read something about codependency or Codependent relationship.
And emotional Blackmailing is part of it.He is not going to call or anything…just distracting myself…I should better move on maybe and forget all about him..what a pity ughhh
Today strangely I feel the way how I felt for him in the beginning, like falling in love with him again, feeling the butterflies in me…just a while ago on my way back home I listened to the songs that I used to listen during the first times of our relationship thats why maybe I just felt that way..
Now making a cup of tea for myself with the cup he gifted to me…it has ugly tall cats on it looking like cheetah.
I will be allright I guessHi Malinda, more on my current situation can be found here https://ebpforums.com/boards/topic/day-19-of-nc-and-contacted-by-my-ex/#post-16653
Give it more time Malinda. Common sense often goes out of the window when emotions are running high where love is concerned.
I didn’t think that my Ex would contact me at all during my planned 35 days of NC. While I am not happy with the way in which she has made contact, perhaps it was the only way in which she felt capable of doing so? Perhaps it is a positive sign that she is starting to realise that her recent behaviour can’t continue if she wants me to be part of her life as she says she does?
I don’t know how she will react to me holding strong and not being there for her this time. I am hoping that she will realise how much she needs me, how much she misses me and that her behaviour since our split has not been in her best interests or mine.
I’m willing to start again as friends but I’m not willing to be kept on a piece of string in a one sided relationship where I am offering support to her and receiving nothing but emotional abuse in return.
It’s her choice to make and she has to realise that I won’t put up with being treated like this for ever.
@Shawns Thank you for the tips on codependency. I certainly recognise some of these traits in myself and my Ex partners.
I will be looking for further reading and help on this.
Thanks once again.
Hi Sparky,
Your welcome.
Actually were on the same boat…It’s already the 3rd day since our break-up and I know it’s a bit early but I think she doesn’t miss me at all.
We talk on the phone last Monday after our break up and ask her if he could come on my biopsy operation and an operation in taking of the massive tissues inside my left breast (You know for moral support… I’m a thousand miles away from my family)… After we talk I decided to no longer contact her even if she text or call me today or tomorrow…I really feel you bro… I was in a Codependent relationship with her for 10 months…
But I still miss her so bad… Like Hell…I hope everything works out for you Bro.
@Malinda Just give him a couple more days..
I know this is hard for you… Everyone of us here is experiencing the same thing..
Stay strong…@sparky Yea I’m trying so hard to give it a time, it gets easy sometimes but sometimes its just unbearable really…
I hope she will understand your value, keep it up and thank you very much for support I really need to talk to people that are in somewhat same position because most of others around me don’t really feel me.
I did feel awfully terrible yesterday I can’t really put it in words any single piece of how bad I felt..
@shawns thank you so much@malinda Your welcome…
As long as I’m allowed to use a pc, I’ll make sure to get in touch with you guys here.@sparky I just read the links you given…I did the same things right after the first phn conversation, the things he said to me that we are not matching and he becomes something else when he is with me, I deactivated my fb and whatsapp acc. then he tried to call me and texted me asking how am i and sorry if distrubed then for a week or less I got back on whatsapp to stalk on him and give him the message that I’m moving on and stayed online on it for a long as if I’m talking to others then he sent me a song link I didnt response…then I deleted my acc on whatsapp again after that he didnt call and nothing till I call him after 2 weeks which was a mistake maybe and I pour out my anger told him not good things, the day after I called him again but that time I was chill and relax and he tried not to finish the conversation while I said just calling to say hi and thats it…
It seems like she needs you by her side to support but not commiting at the same time, as if shes using you…so don’t give up I hope she will understand your value@malinda,
What do you think about my situation?
Is it really hopeless?@shawn you should continue NC..she has done such emotional abuse, she doesnt want you twoo fight or argue in front of people but she does that to you on fb, its kinda tricky and my ex did such things to me too..you dont realise but it makes you feel miserable after sometime.
How many days of NC for you now ?
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