17 days NC

Hey Pingpong,
Glad to help. I wish you the best luck with your ex and it’s great you’ve had a change of heart and finally realized what it is really important in your life. No money, absolutely nothing material can compare to how a woman can make us feel and what she can give us.
Let us know how the date went.

Regarding my case, well it’s definitely almost a hopeless case after five years we have tried. I am in the “letting go process”, where I am letting all the negatives feelings about this relationship go and accept things as they are. I am not giving up on her but I can’t force anything, at the moment it’s not meant to be.

Catherine,

I think it’s more likely that your ex’s friend put that on there and then felt weird about it and took it down before his friend (your ex) saw it. Either way, I hope you don’t feel sad– someone called you attractive and either that made your ex feel jealous or someone worried that it would. These all say positive things about you.

Amy,

Any more reach outs from your ex? I’d be surprised if you didn’t hear within the first few weeks of him being back. Either way, just keep plugging forward and you’ll start to feel better I promise.

Absoutely FishingTheSky, i have made a huge change in my life because of her. Money is no longer important to me at all and I am pretty happy now that i did. I have gotten a lot of time to improve myself because of it, and think about what i truely want in my life and future. Youre so right, there is nothing to compare to what a woman can do for us, but we all learn from our mistakes and hopefully we all get another chance at redemption. I too was in a similar position as you Fishingthesky, I don’t want to give up on my ex either but i know we cant force her to love us. It all depends on them. But eventually, the tables will turn for us. Keep strong brother. I will absoutely let everyone know about how my date will go. There are multiple scenarios that i run through my head on what i want to do but heck, ill just wing it, show her my new ver 2.0 me.

Hi catherine8,
from my point of view, i believe he still has feelings for you as i did that with my ex before, and i deleted it right away after posting. I dont think it was his friends that made him delete it but maybe his own part. Before i would rpely a text to me ex, and regret sending it, and if i could get it back and delete it, i wouldve. Reason me for deleting was because i wanted to have the upperhand. I wanted her to contact me first, etc.

Hiya Palmtrees!

Nope, nothing yet since he got bCk, or since that “like” on the picture of a group of us in Bangkok. I still find that very wierd…but I’m not dwelling on it. There Re too many factors now which make me dislike him a lot, and the lies he fed me before saying how much he wanted to better himself and not get with other people were completely false, as he very much splattered that he was on Facebook…I don’t need that negativity in my life anymore! ??

Ok guys I want to tell you something that I consider very important at this stage of recovery/improvement.
The worst phase post breakup is over and despite we still have our relapses, we are definitely more lucid. Now you need to stay true to yourself, this means being coherent.
Saying “I hate what he/she’s done, I don’t like him/her anymore etc…but I still miss him/her, want him/her back etc.” is contradictory and unproductive. Wanting the person back even if you say you don’t accept the way she/he is, is not the right input to rebuild a healthy relationship. If you want a clean slate, you don’t have to accept and be content with what you are not satisfied with just because you are afraid to lose him/her or ideally think he/she was the only one for you. Wrong. You can aspire for better.

Palmtrees, and FishingTheSky any new updates?

So I decided to actually GO OUT on a date tonight, not just speak to someone on a dating app…

Wierdly enough, it was quite fun. We chatted, ate nice food…and he was really mature for his age, compared to my ex anyway. What this has made me realise though is that “spark” just wasn’t there…which I guess I always noticed with my ex. The date was fun but made me realise I am still hopelessly in love with my ex still 🙁 which is sad. I’m still clinging to hope that the like he did on Instagram means he misses me. Our best friend also got engaged too yesterday, she put it in Facebook( she had got together th same time my ex and I had) and it made me so sad. We both liked it, and yeah…it’s made me feel all wierd really ;(

My update–

After my ex started reaching out to me despite the fact that I told him I had no interest in being friends, we continued talking. I am pretty sure it is his hope (based on his past actions) that he has this idea that we can slowly start talking about and then move forward. However, it makes me feel used and I don’t like it. I got a little frustrated with him one night– which was bound to happen. A few days later I told him that I got frustrated because I can’t be friends with him, we need to either be moving slowly forward or not talking. He said he thought my frustrations were an example of how things would not be any better. My thoughts (I’m a pretty self-aware person) are that if I weren’t in this confusing “friendship” to begin with there would have been no issue. At the end I asked him to not talk to me anymore unless he wants to move forward. THE NEXT DAY he texted me about a change at our favorite coffee spot. I told him his next text about coffee better be for a date. It’s pretty clear he does not take my requests seriously (in part my fault) and I am also positive he really does want to “slowly” work things out, but I can’t do it that way, it brings out a side in me that I do not like. He’s not ready to do things my way, so we are at an impasse.

Going on a second date with this other guy this morning, hiking and breakfast– wish me luck.