Sickandtired

Day 35 NC. He kept canceling plans, wouldn’t text for a week, would never see me. So, I went dark. No explanation. Just stopped responding. I’ve had it and I’m done. But, I need to vent, so here is the email I will never send (kinda embarrassing but totally honest):

I loved what we could have been, not what we were. The truth is that you never wanted to love/bond with me, and I’m fine with that. I was never a priority to you and you never seemed genuinely interested in me as a person. Life is too short to wait around for someone who doesn’t recognize my ninja level of awesome. I’m keenly aware of how successful, sophisticated, funny, AND sexy I am. (Real talk ???). Unfortunately, frustration and disappointment became my prevailing emotions because you never showed up for the relationship, or even tried to make me happy (or even see me for that matter. You’d think I would have wised up sooner. Remember that cartoon? His fault. Lol). You were 100% emotionally unavailable to me. I put up with way more than I should have, and now I’m moving on. It’s the best thing for us both anyway, given our situations – esp yours. I know why you’re reaching out, but I’m definitely not your go-to phone sex girl. Therein lies the crux of the problem: I wanted your time, attention and love. You just wanted phone sex. Incompatible goals. (Hit up CL? ?). I thought you MIGHT be sincere this time (You love me? Hmm, yeah I sorta bought it.), but once again your actions belied your words. People don’t really change. I can’t make you love me any more than you can make me believe that you do. But, it’s all water under the bridge now. I don’t regret any of it, though. It felt amazingly real for a minute. I’ll miss that. And you. I loved you madly, and would have gone the distance with you. Just remember that you left me long before I stopped speaking to you. And you can’t say I didn’t fight for us, because I did. At the end of the day, we have quite a memory and story to tell, huh? Just leave out my name and pics, please. ?Lol. (I really wish you’d delete them, but I’m sure you won’t. It offends me that you show your Bros). Best wishes and farewell. I hope you have a beautiful, successful and fulfilling life. I mean that, love. Xoxo?✌️