shootermcgavin

I have a similar situation of doing NC after being friends. Been two months since break up after a 3.5 year relationship. We tried the being friends thing for the last couple months. It was weird cause she still wanted me physically but not in a relationship (we have different beliefs etc and she told me she keeps records of our arguments to remind herself). The week after we broke up she skipped work to hang out and have sex. Then a few weeks later she was meeting up for sex and cuddles only every few days for a couple weeks. I got a bit annoyed that every time I asked to hang out she’d make plans to see other friends and felt like I was being used. She stopped wanting to have sex saying she felt guilty because of her religious beliefs but it was also partly because I confronted her about not making an effort to hang out.

We hung out for lunch a couple weeks ago but I told her that we should have some space for a while so I can be a proper friend in the future. 3 days later she texts me saying she was in a bad mood and anxious about things. I text back saying things will be ok etc. I’ve been no contact 12 days since then but she kept texting me; not saying she wants to get back together but just asking me things like how are you, what are you doing, you should try blah blah blah out. Two days ago she messed with my head by saying good luck with exams then an hour later saying “sigh it seems like you aren’t talking to me, good luck with your new job, I won’t talk to you anymore.”

I’m assuming this is some sort of test or reverse psychology to make me talk to her, but I don’t know why she wants me to talk to her as she gives no information in her texts. She wanted to break up and have space and when I wanted to fix things she didn’t want a bar of it. Part of me wants to remind her that I’m doing no contact for myself so she doesn’t think I’m pushing her away and the other part thinks I should say nothing so she can wonder what I’m up to.

The other thing with no contact is that it is starting to make me not want her as much. I can remember the things I didn’t like in our relationship and am more objective. I resent her more for breaking up and resent her for not giving me a chance when I always gave her a chance. I resent that it requires ignoring her for a set amount of time to be valued. That’s human nature though…I’d like to keep the option of rekindling things open though. I was thinking 2 months after a break up is too late, but if we were still having sex then the attraction must still be there? Even if we technically had broken up, we’ve never had more than a week without talking before..