Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
Hey guys! I thought I might add to the conversation. How long were guys with your exes?
You are doing the right thing with no contact. Just let them wonder about you, girls don’t move on quickly.Did you guys find it hard to be in a ldr? My ex and I were together 5 years and he got a job in Germany and shortly after broke up with me…(I’m still in the usa and we were both living in the same city here) I’m wondering how I can get him back…and convince him it can be done! That’s the only reason we broke up. He thought it would be too stressful… But I’m going up be in Germany in a month …I’m hoping he can meet up with me. I haven’t told him yet
Thank you for your support @kalicooldude
I will try skype first because we had talked on there after the breakup and had some good convos. The only email I sent that he didnt respond to yet was just a link,3 days ago. I guess technically he wouldn’t have to respond since I didn’t really type anything. But I’m really hoping he’s up for talking to me on the webcam that way I feel like I’ll be able to better judge his reactions and his attitude toward me
thank you for the advice. I’m definitely trying to not scare him off but I would really rather talk to him in person about it. I actually got a new skype account so I’ll just casually add him and if he doesn’t add me back I may try an email. He wants to be friends and keep in touch so I’m really hoping he agrees. He had talked to me on skype before so I hope he will again. Idk it’s hard
Thank you @atea and @kaila. Yeah I was trying to be friendly and just sent him a link to a German article I thought was funny. So if he doesn’t respond to that I guess it’s ok. The last emails we exchanged he answered me pretty quickly. I need to add him on skype to talk to him about this trip …should I wait a week or so? I’m not planning on sending anymore emails right now and I would prefer to talk to him face to face. Do you guys think this is a bad idea?
@kaila I did, I guess I’m at deaths door. Did that relationship rewind help you at all?
Thank you @jean
Does anyone else have any other advice? I really feel like he is ignoring me now.
I thought he would want to talk to me after not communicating for a few months…but I feel like he doesn’t care
The breakup is really fresh. Try to do nc for a longer period of time. That way you can actually make significant changes and show her you can be better for her. If she does get with another guy it will be a rebound and mean nothing. Stay strong and work on yourself, I know it’s hard when I first started nc after my breakup I literally felt like I was dying. But I needed that time to calm down and not do or say something stupid to push him away more
Have you broken NC besides the email about the resume? Or are you doing limited contact since it sounds like you met her?
I would say try to talk to her again casually and try to build a connection. Be friendly and funny and see if she’s open to communicating with you often. If that goes well see if you can’t meet up to talk or hang out in person.
Just keeping being your best self. That’s what I’m trying to do with my ex :/
Thank you @jeanvalins
Im trying to think of ways to talk to him about me coming over there. He told me he would be traveling a lot in may…but I want to let him know ill be there just in case he can meet up.
Should I just add him on Skype and not say anything about it?
Yeah I’m also working up to being friends. he said he wanted that so I’m trying to rebuild the connection. The thing is he removed me from his skype contacts a few months ago after an emotional convo we had. But I’ve recently been emailing with him and I want to get back to talking with him on skype. I’m not sure how to do it. Should I ask if we can?or just try to re add him from my account?
Also I’m going to be in Europe this may in Germany where he is…it could be a chance to see other, should I mention it? :/
Thank you @calicooldude. That makes me feel better. I’m trying to go slow but it’s hard. I just don’t know how to beat the distance. It’s killing me
@kalicooldude so we were together 5 years and during that time we were always in the same place. He took the job beginning of sept and we broke up start of October. At first he said he wanted us to be together, but he changed his mind saying he didn’t realize how hard it would be… I think he just had a freak out about this big of a life change. He left for Europe in December and he said his contract would be for at least 2 years.
Yeah I first did 3 weeks of nc right after the break up… but then I just finished 3 months of nc and started talking to him again. Im just scared he wont think he has the time to be in a relationship with me while he is still there..because apparently he is super busy. Honestly I would probably wait 2 years till he came back.. obviously I would hope that he might change his mind before then. Im trying to show him im positive and doing well..
@jax I would say that im surprised she is still acting hostile towards you after all that time. I think maybe she was angered by your email that was basically saying im giving up on you? even though she is the one that left, maybe that email ticked her off again… im not sure.
you cant really actively try to get your ex back if you cant talk to her. so it sounds like you either have to just wait and see if she wants to talk to you and if she does she will reach out… but since it sounds like that’s not really a good option maybe you can try to text or email her to say that you would like her in your life and it would be nice to meet in person. idk im the kind of person that wouldn’t listen to my ex if he told me to never talk to him again… I know him better than anyone and I know he would just be putting up a front. maybe she is doing the same
