resilienza

Hey, it’s me again

Yesterday he texted me. He said that something that happened at work made him think about me and wished me good luck for my graduation.

We both sent each other 3/4 texts, then he said “I’m happy to hear from you”. I replied saying that I was happy too to hear from him. He read my texts today which is like 24h later and then nothing.

I am confused. Maybe he thinks we can be friends. In 4 months this is the first time he ever initiates contact, and I will not let this thing mess up with my brain, don’t want to read too much into this. But what is going on?!

Thank you for your support. I guess that he replies only because the content of my texts is cordial and kinda reminds him of a friend. When I texted him to tell him that I loved him and felt miserable without him blablabla he would NEVER reply.

He never officially broke up with me, he just disappeared without a single word, he was tired with the situation I had with my family and it made him feel bad I guess, that’s why he broke up with me. The last text he sent me before disappearing says “good night, I love you” so I think he still loved me at that point.

Now it’s been almost 4 months, since I’ve never experienced any breakup before, do you think that in a one year relationship 4 months is too much time? I keep hoping but this hope is torturing me.

FishingTheSky:

thanks for your words, but I kinda feel like somehow he has already made his decision and he’s the most stubborn person that I know.

I am not trying to convince him to come back to me, just trying to show him why he fell in love with me and that I can be the improved version of that person.

So what do you suggest? Should I stop contacting him? And for how long? He’s already used to not hearing from me for two/three weeks and the longest time was a month. Doesn’t this ruin all my chances to rebuild a solid connection if we don’t have those casual everyday conversations that couples have?

Hey, it’s me again

So after ten days I texted him yesterday, I had just passed an important exam and I needed to tell him (during our relationship he was so supportive with me when I had exams at the uni).

I told him that I had passed my exam and that I wanted to thank him because in his last text he wished me good luck and told me not to worry, so I said that I felt motivated by him and I wanted to thank me.

He replied that he was happy for my exam and he hoped I got a good mark and I didn’t have to thank him.

I replied again saying that in the end it’s just a mark and that it doesn’t matter that much. I told him that I hoped he had relaxed during his holidays and that everything was good at work.

He said “yep you’re right it’s just a mark, I’ve enjoyed my holidays and everything is ok at work.

I told him I was happy for him and he deserves that and now I was the one who worked without taking holidays (I’m doing an internship while studying and didn’t go on holiday, while these were his first holidays after years).
I wished him a nice day and ended the convo.

He replied “good luck I know it’s hard, you too have a nice day and take care”.

To me he’s acting cold and distant and I have the impression that after two months of ignoring me he replies out of politeness. I am scared he has already moved on and doesn’t care about me anymore so replying or not is indifferent to him.

Do you think I should let him go or hold on to my stupid hopes?

I answered saying that I was fine, that it was quite a busy period for me (without saying way) and that I hope he was fine and he was taking care of himself. I waited like 5 hours because I was at work.

He answered after two hours with “thank you, good luck, hope you’re doing well” (I mean I just told you I’m doing well why you have to ask again). So I went to bed and slept but woke up after two hours and texted back “thanks, I will need it, good night (his name).

As soon as I hit send he came online and read my text (literally 1 second after), don’t know what that means, and texted “you will achieve your goals, don’t worry, good night (my name) and take care.

Now, my opinion is that we are neutral and cold but at least it proves that we can have a short conversation without fighting.

I think I will wait for him to do the next move and if he doesn’t I will do the “saw something that made me think about you” thing, but in a couple of weeks because he’s now on holiday at his parent’s house.

I thought about sending him a picture of a thing that I saw the other day in the street and that is related to a happy memory we share.

But God this is just like a war, all these strategies and planning are just not part of me. He was my boyfriend and best friend, and now we look like strangers.