FS1

Hi everyone reading,

I am on day 8 NC today (although perhaps it’s day 7 because we officially broke up the morning of day 1)

I am finding it impossible to get the ex out of my head. It doesn’t matter how busy or focussed I am on something. I read a book before bed and I want to discuss it with him, then I go to sleep thinking about him. I’ve woken up every morning since with a sad song in my head that reminds me of him! I have a multitude of assignments to complete for work and I’m getting through them at record speed. So much so that my supervisor has been commending me for my organisation. If only she knew I was doing nothing but working to avoid stewing in my depression…and also because I have no friends in my city currently (they have all gone away at the same time to visit family – typical).

I know NC is meant to be for me to get over it and accept that the relationship is over, and perhaps when the days are done I will have a change of heart and not want to get back with him. But right now all I want to do is talk to him! How do you keep yourself sane. I have only really had 2 breakdowns after the break up. But I accidentally hit myself in the face really hard with my phone this morning. It hurt really bad but the problem was I burst into tears, not because of that but because I couldn’t tell him about it, because he had broken my heart and dumped me!!! Now I think about it I’m angry!

So has anyone got any advice on how to get the ex out of my head? I can’t even smash myself in the face by accident without thinking about him! It’s annoying, I can’t begin to heal if I’m plagued about thoughts of how I want to fix the relationship after NC is complete.

Thanks people!!