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@dragongirl Is there a way I can talk to you personally? There are some things going on and I think you may be able to help but I don’t want to make a big deal about it on here.
Well, I texted him and told him that I’m going birthday shopping with my mom, so he is going to come with me and we can talk then. So I didn’t give him a choice, I basically told him what to do. I texted him that really early just because I needed to plan out my day. He called me about half an hour ago and told me that he got me a small gift and he was all excited to talk to me. He told me he’d call me about making plans when to meet up because I was taking a shower.
I figured since he got me a gift he may really want to talk and have something to say? I mean, I really don’t care if we talk or not. Not seeing him won’t ruin my day and I’m definitely not desperate to see him.
What I meant by telling him things, I meant to tell him how far he’s pushed me away and all that and that I deserve better. Which is the truth. But I will let him speak first.
@Thargus Welcome to the wonderful world of confusion and mind games 🙁
I’m sorry all that happened to you @Hanna Nelson 🙁 but I am proud of you for making a change!! I completely agree with your point of view!
So my ex called me this morning and left a voicemail telling me he was off and he would like to talk to me.
I honestly want to go because I feel the need to explain to him how I feel. Plus I need someone to come with me to go birthday shopping with my mom. But I feel the need to discuss with him to explain the impacting he has made. I’ve kept quiet. I think my intervals of NC is starting to prove to him that I’m starting not to care. I was told not to send that letter, however, I could basically say what I said in that to him.
So I probably will but I just need some opinions? We have never talked about any of this and we constantly avoid it. I think it just needs to be discussed.
You know, a couple hours ago, I began thinking about “how could my ex do all of that horrible stuff to me? how could he be with other women? how could he hurt me so bad? how could he claim to even love me?” and I almost began to start crying, but I stopped myself and I said to myself “I will cry another day. But as for right now it doesn’t matter.” I’ve gotten on with the rest of my night since then.
I have no promises to how easy it will become. But I’m not saying it won’t become easy within some way shape or form.
Like I said, I’ll be on here sooner or later upset about something with my ex! It is all natural, but just remember that I suffered for 7 months (when I mean suffered, I mean suffered) over someone that I shared 3 years with who happened to be my first everything. Now I’m at this level and I know I will have my breakdowns and crying sessions once it a while, but I won’t crack and contact him and I will keep my distance until I am moved on and then maybe something may work out. Trust me, it gets so much easier and I basically just officially ended my relationship like 4 days ago.
By next semester, you’ll probably be over her. Look at it that way. Read the post that I posted on @betweens thread. It goes for the both of you!
That is a definite no-no! I refuse to even consider looking at one of my ex’s social media sites. If he unfollows me, I just unfollow him back. I don’t look at anything. It sucks to say, but I don’t and I don’t care to. So stop that!
For your weak moments just talk to us. Vent to us. Tell us about what you’re feeling and thinking. We will help you through it. Just remember that it is a blast from the past and no matter what, you can’t change it.
My thing is, as hard as it is for even me to say, in the end if they don’t come back, you’re still going to live. Losing them will not kill us. It just teaches us how to grow.
I know it is a concept easier said than done, but its the truth.. Plenty of people survive through losing relationships..and they survive through getting through the next one to find the one. It is so hard for even me to handle, but it is the truth..
It’ll all get better in the end for all of us, but at this point, whatever happens happens and it is out of your control and their control until we all have an agreement with our exes to work things out. That time may never come, but that just means that they weren’t the one. Its better to spend the rest of your life with someone and have a healthy relationship, instead of spending it with a very unhealthy person.
I’m confused about what you first said after you agreed that what we said was true? I’m confused that’s all!
We already told you he does those things because he cares about you. I told you that he can care and love you all he wants but that doesn’t mean he is willing to have anything more with you than just a convenient hook up and support system. It is so hard to say that, and again I told you it isnt intentional, but he only is concerned with his needs. He knows what you want and even though he apologizes that he can’t give it to you right now, he still doesn’t do anything about it (which would mean letting you go for your own sake). That is what confusion is. Even though it isn’t intended this way, it is beyond selfish.
The more you stick around the more confusion will set in. You have to realize that he isn’t going to forget about you, he is going to miss you, and he will regret it (whether he ever admits it or not). I know at points I will break down and ask those questions like what if he will forget about me, what if he doesn’t miss me, what if he doesn’t regret it, what if he meets someone else better than me, what if he hates me, what if we never talk again, etc. Well I will ask people that just so I can hear their opinions because I know what they are going to say because they’re right. I just need that reassurance. He won’t forget about me, he will miss me, he will regret it, he won’t find better, he won’t hate me, we may talk again, etc. However, I have also accepted the fact that even though I know all of that, that he may never admit it and we may not have contact and we may never get back together. If it isn’t meant to be. It isn’t meant to be. You’re situation is exactly like mine.
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