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Thanks guys, it’s so unfortunate, I thought I had my plan worked out on how to get her back and I had been doing great. Now it seems, I’m going to have to work even harder.
The article I read mentioned that GIGS is very common with girls aged between 18-25 (my ex is 19) and is where a she starts getting cold feet in a relationship that has lasted 2 years or more. Our relationship started when we were pretty young age wise, she was 16, me 17. So you could say we grew up together, becoming adults in the process.
GIGS occurs when she notices other guys give her attention, that was certainly the case when I noticed she started texting another guy literally right under my nose. Eventually I questioned her about him and she explained he is a co-worker and “just a friend” and wouldn’t go near him since he is 27. The article mentions that she would start fantasising about a relationship with this “friend” when she realises “is this it? Is this who I’m going to be with for the rest of my life?”
My ex and I were talking about plans for the future and I was looking forward to making extra commitment. It would be at this point she suddenly wants out the relationship but doesn’t have a legit reason so analyses every negative thing to try escape with an excuse.
So it’s very disheartening to think that while I thought very highly of her and treated her like something special she still thinks that she can do better. All our mutual friends know she has made a very stupid mistake and that we are very much perfect for each other. I hope she realises this sooner rather than later, though I just know her new guy is treating her so much better.
He will get normal again with time, you may want to back off slightly with the contacting perhaps another week of NC, he might just wonder where you’ve gone so suddenly, keep him curious. See if he tries to initiate contact with you.
This is excellent news @divjun just keep him interested and try not to analyse his every move he will come in his own time you know what guys are like with their distractions!
I wouldn’t write the letter if I were you, continue through with NC and keep yourself busy with something that takes your mind off him.
Its very similar to the situation im in, I wrote a letter however she is yet to find it. There are some things I regret writing in it now as it could push her further away but I also wrote many valid things that might get the message across so it could go either way.
Have you tried talking to other guys? A little date here and there could be very effective.
