Bouman

Hello Patricia,

Thanks for your reply, I appreciate it!
My age is 35 now. She’s 34.

I understand that after some time infatuation wears off and the “butterfly feelings” dissapear.
But I just have a feeling that if those feelings dissapear on her, she desires that feeling again.
Hence she didn’t often have a relationship over 4+ months. (as she told me)

When I met her she just started to use meds for a some time. She said she had much more control over her feelings and how to act in certain ways or how to control her thinking and act rationally.
Later in our relationship she said she had the feelings the meds wore off.
And she began to have these splurge’s towards me and was much more tempered. (ADHD Symptome)

We both wanted it to work so badly, but because of the discussions we had about things from her past (she clearly wasn’t over yet) we got those negative aura around us all the time, and we both got in a downwards spiral. And because of her HSP she has a much harder and longer time to process it and get over it.

Her insecurity started almost from the start, while I was really secure at that time.
She asked things like: Constantly asking if I still liked her physically, or if I would not be better off with another girl, or ask if I still liked to be around her, or if her insecurity would make me leave. I constantly had to comfort her and say that I would never leave her for anything she was afraid off.

My insecurity started off when I got the feeling she backed away. I felt less affection from her than I did before and asked her if there was something wrong. She told me not to worry, but it didn’t fel right. So I became a bit needy aswell. There was this constant tension going on towards eachother because we both wanted our relation to work and have a good time together. We really cared about eachother!

Its not about being to MUCH with my friends, its about the things my friends do. (which I don’t)
And to prove her, I didn’t go often to my friends anymore because I was afraid that she would think badly about me. But I can’t completely ban them out of my life at once.

Yes, I did thank her for my birthdaycard. It was short and brief. Haven’t spoken to her in person since 18 july, and the last message I send was to thank her on my birthday (24 july).

I still hope she will contact me!