Ashtray

@patricia12 we were together for a year. He left me without saying anything while I was at work on January 5th. He didn’t say anything other than he needed space and was tired of the arguing then blocked me off of all of social media. Since the time he left me to the time of my post we slept together twice, he’s come over just to hang out a couple times and we’ve gotten into one argument but it was in public. I apologized for that argument and a couple days he messaged me to see how I was doing then I decided to invite him over but he didn’t respond until the next day. So that was the day that he came over that I mentioned above. I texted him about seeing him purposely avoid me because he was acting like he cared the week prior then after we hooked up went back to acting like I was nothing and that hurt me so I wanted a definant answer. After he gave it to me I left him alone then he decided to message me to apologize. I was going to ignore it but I read through the advanced book and it says to not ignore them but to simply basically state that you need time and space and you hope they understand so I did and he said that he does and hopes I’m doing better. Since then I really have been. I’ve been spending time with friends, making new plans and ultimately loving myself and the life I live. I really let go of all that anger and it feels good. I still miss him and I’ve bumped into him omce since this post on Valentine’s Day at the mini market and felt my heart drop knowing that we weren’t spending it together but I held myself together and went about my night. I don’t cry anymore because I’m upset about the situation but I have cried a couple times just because I simply miss him and his presence. I don’t feel that need to have him around all the time it’s just a want now. It’s been 20 days now and I have really come to realize that it’s true what they say, time really does heal. I’ve learned a lot from my breakup, not just about the relationship and him but myself as well and I feel like I’ve really gotten in touch with a deeper me and I love it. I feel like I’m my own best friend. It feels so good.