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Posts
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@Oshi I am crying my eyes out because he just pisses me off so much. I don’t have time to wait around for this bullshit anymore. I have exams to study for and all I can worry about is if he is going to take off or not. I don’t even know if he has take off! I just want to explode on him and let him know how much he hurts me. I’m a very honest person and I let people know when they hurt me and bottling things up isn’t something I normally do. So being in my emotional state, I want to call him and just tell him Nevermind. I just really wanted this day off with him.. I wanted it more than anything..
@Oshi But you’re right.. I have gotten really far with him and I am going through my “special time of the month” so that could be another reason why I am so emotional. I just feel bad for asking him so often but it isn’t really fair. I just want to become a priority again and it is so hard.. :'(
@ellie Believe me I know exactly how it feels! most of our fights were during this time. I can become so emotional that I even surprise myself sometimes hehe. And that is exactly the time when I feel like giving up and feeling pessimistic about everything. The best thing is to stay calm and think of it as just a temporary feeling that will pass after some moments.
@Oshi It is the worst time lol. I’m just trying to act rational, but at the same time it really is bothering me. I can’t even have real feelings around him anymore. I’m trying to handle all of this without saying or doing something stupid. I’m kind of rushing the situation only because I don’t know when his boss does scheduling. I have to know by today to at least keep my mind at ease. Just handling it, I have no idea how to do that.
@Oshi I don’t even know if this is worth it anymore.
Lol my ex didn’t even take me seriously that time of the month, wrote it all off to my hormones which pissed me off even more:) try to stay calm and don’t contact him today!
I’m actually now texting me with my ex and he’s being nice! Well at least not mean:) I thanked him for something he did for me yesterday and checked on him. He seemed pleased.
Can’t believe we’re holding on to these straws:) whatever happened to self esteem?@divinegirl and @Oshi I wrote out what I may text him just because it is going to drive me crazy if I don’t know today. I don’t think it sounds desparate or needy, I am just explaining myself. However, I may wait a day to send it, but this is what I would say. “Hey, so I am texting you for 2 reasons. 1) HAVE AN ABSOLUTELY AMAZING DAY 🙂 it is beautiful out so take your bike out and enjoy it!! and 2) I am sorry for bothering you so much about taking a Saturday off.. I really just wanted to spend a day with you, blahblah, and blahblah and then have the evening with you to myself without having to be on a time schedule. I had it all planned out and they seemed excited about it. It was just to give you a chance to relax and have fun, and to just get away. I thought you deserved that since you work so much and you have been dealing with a lot lately.. I needed it too honestly. But I mentioned it almost a week ago, and you have yet to tell me whether or not you have taken off. You promised a couple nights ago that you would, but you haven’t mentioned anything since. I completely understand how busy you are at work. I don’t want to make any assumptions (so I’m not), but I feel like it is just because you don’t want to hang out with me or even be around me at all.. Which is fine, but I at least deserve to know..and they need to know too. I am sorry I bother you so much, I really am. I promise I won’t anymore.”
Nix the last two sentences. Over apologizing is not good either. Sorry I’m harsh but speaking from experience. The rest is fine I guess.
@divinegirl I need your harshness! Lol! I just want to get my point across to him. I mean we are really close, and I don’t think its too overwhelming..
A couple weeks ago I stopped taking one of my medications and it sent me in an emotional spin and I sent him this long text about how happy I am with where we are and that I am happy we broke up because we wouldn’t be where we are today and that I know we both still love each other and plan on having a future together and all this other mushy gushy stuff. And I sent it when he was sleeping and I thought he was ignoring me so I called him twice and my last message basically told him goodbye and that I am so sorry and all of this crap. Then I got a text from him when he woke up and he was like “I read this when I woke up…I dont know what is going on but I hope everything is okay and keep your head up and look towards the future not the past”. So what I sent him last time was pretty overwhelming! Haha! That’s why I didn’t think this would be that big of a deal.. But he’s awake now, so I can’t send it. Just gotta act happy, right?
How are things with you and your ex?
Wow, yes that sounds pretty intense:)
Me and my ex are nowhere near where you are. He’s made it clear he doesn’t love me anymore and I should move on as did he. Idk what I’m still hoping for here but I’m just so happy to at least be talking to him again. It’s been a very emotional roller coaster for me and all my friends tell me he’s an asshole and I need to move on but I simply can’t. Oh and we’re thousands of miles apart so that doesn’t help either. I just miss him so much that some days I feel like I can’t breathe. Last year this time we went on a wonderful vacation in Cyprus and Turkey and I’m just missing him extra these days. Plus it’s my birthday soon and all I want for my birthday is him. So yeah I’m pretty pathetic, go ahead and say it:)@divinegirl That isn’t pathetic at all.. I understand and people go through this all the time. I don’t judge at all. It makes me feel like I should be at least thankful, but guess what, I’m still not happy. We all have our different problems and it is completely okay. So I sympathize and completely understand. Have you tried seeing other people?
@divinegirl That’s not pathetic at all! I feel the same. This time last year we were also on a vacation together and the memories just keep popping up on my mind. Also his birthday is coming up and all I want is to celebrate it with him. Last year we invited all of his friends and it was really fun! It’s just hard thinking about it this time. I hope everything will turn out fine! Stay strong and be positive!
@ellie I understand what you want to tell him but I don’t think you should apologize. Why would you say that you won’t bother him anymore if you have a close relationship with him? I think it would make you sound like you are not already part of his life, like he doesn’t owe you anything when he really should.
@Oshi I’m just emotional because of my monthly, you understand :/ anyways, I saw him earlier today and we had fun. He was so excited to see me and he complimented me on how I looked. He was very loving. Then we cut things half an hour short because he was tired and since he still lives with his family, we have been cautious about me coming around because we don’t want any drama. I acted kind of upset about it but then again, put on the smiley face. I mentioned about the whole Saturday thing and he was like “you don’t understand it is easier to request a month off in advance and blah blah blah” so I just don’t give a crap about that anymore because it is annoying me. Then he mentioned he was off this Saturday and something along the lines of he wants to spend time with me but he has to plan it around his time schedule (go figure). Then I was just like “yeah, a time limit” and he was like “I am really trying you have to give me credit, blah blah blah”. And then we parted. I haven’t talked to him since. He told me to text him and I was like “no you text me” so I don’t know who is texting first.
I guess I have to work on becoming a priority or something. What do I do now?
@ellie Maybe you should wait for him to initiate. Like I’ve said before you have to make yourself less available to him, don’t meet up with him whenever he wants, do it so it will be on your terms. If he wants to meet up at some day tell him that you’re busy and suggest another day and that way see if he’d try to make time for you too.
If you’re feeling like you can’t keep up with this anymore then maybe you should distance yourself so he would realize his behavior.@ellie96 I agree with Oshi that perhaps the best would be to distance yourself from him. At least you got to talk to him about Saturday so you can calm down a bit now.
I have a major update!!! So last night my ex texted me on Whatsapp while I was sleeping and was like there’s this whatsapp call function. It was the first time he texted me himself, without me initiating it! I mean I did text him yesterday but it was very short and he was busy. So I was surprised to see that text in the morning. So he ended up calling me and had a great conversation for almost 2 hours! Just like in old times:) He showed me pics of his newly renovated house and seemed to care about my opinion. He even complimented me on the way I looked. Mind you, this was me just out of bed (not like he hadn’t seen it before lol). Anyway, Idk what to make of it but it was honestly so nice to catch up with him. Just made me think how much I still miss him!!! Argggghhhh….
To your earlier question, no I haven’t seen anyone else since we broke up mainly cuz I’ve been going thru other stuff and just don’t have the bandwidth for a new relationship right now. I do want to start seeing other people thou cuz it’s been a while so I’m going to work on that. I’m not going to assume anything or get my hopes up now that we’re talking again and will keep looking for other opportunities:)
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