Boards No Contact Rule NC killing me..as she looks cool and full of anger

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Viewing 15 posts - 16 through 30 (of 37 total)
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  • #21113
    JohnLe
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 15

    Hi,
    I am 100% agreed with Sparky.
    for Rahul, I’d believed should go into a good NC. The period is about 30 days.
    further more for Rahul, if you’d smoked then this is the TIME TO QUIT. or if you’d drink or what-ever you’ve addict. then THIS IS THE TIME TO QUIT.
    Quit an addict during NC is a terrible things to do, Because NC is too much for our human being, yet we’d add on a quit, that’s seem like a tortured.
    But trust me, if you counting day after day to quit an addict, and when you’d pass.
    It’s a huge relief for yourself over the NC.
    Because if you can quit an addict, that’s a guarantee you will pass 30 days NC easy.
    So Rahul, get set… GO GO GO GO GO GO GO…

    #21160
    rahul
    Blocked
    • Total Posts: 25

    thank you for your words.
    I am afraid cause we had broke up 5months ago and its a really long time. However we are in contact since last October…but she don’t want to get in relation with me..we are talking to each other like friends but I don’t think it would help me anymore…suggest what to do.
    may I continue chat like friends and make her realise all our love or otherwise do no contact

    #21346
    rahul
    Blocked
    • Total Posts: 25

    finally I caught her lie, she went a movie with a guy before x-mas. but when I asked her that time with whom you had watched movie she replied me with my friends and sister..but his friends is none but that guy. with whom she did chat after our break (5months ago)…I really hate her for lying me. please guys I want to forget her she is so mean,selfish and hates me.advice me how to forget her please

    #21598
    Sparky
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 147

    Why lie to you @Rahul if she no longer cares about what you think? Surely she would just tell you the truth?

    I know where you’re coming from though, as I’m struggling myself.

    #21750
    rahul
    Blocked
    • Total Posts: 25

    @sparky
    she didn’t care about me at that time but she thought if she told me,then I again fight with her and give her some lecture….she had afraid of my emotional lecture nothing else….she talked to me last night and after 20min she ended conversation with saying mean,idiot..I am really disappointed why I am in love with her

    #21777
    Sparky
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 147

    @Rahul Yes I understand what you are saying. My Ex seems to be afraid that I will lecture her and fall out with her again, but she seems to have nearly all of the power and so continually seems to want to pull my triggers.

    This is why I have doubts if she can even remain friends with me. We only seem weeks away from another bust up at best. I wonder if it is her testing me but I am not so sure and am scared of opening up and allowing her to hurt me again.

    I don’t know what is the best move for me to make and I hate feeling this way.

    #21852
    rahul
    Blocked
    • Total Posts: 25

    really sad,
    I told her to block me..and she did it without think about it. …this much she hates me. I really loves her, how she forget our love..

    #22539
    rahul
    Blocked
    • Total Posts: 25

    this is my 4day of Nc, she yet didn’t message me nor unblock me in whatsapp..may be she is forgetting about my negatives points..as she already forget about our positive in relation..I am just hoping as she’ll message me one day …

    its really hard to be in NC. everyday I wakeup with a dreams of her some times its good and sometimes it scares me by leaving me alone…I really need some advice please help me

    #22617
    Sparky
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 147

    @rahul Try and keep yourself busy my friend. It will get easier for you after two weeks. That is until she contacts you of course. If she does contact you then don’t message her back and try to see out your 30 days or how ever much NC you initially planned.

    If she seems ready to talk after NC then apologise for taking this time out but be sincere and say that you needed some time to focus on yourself for your own peace of mind and health. Personalise your message so it tells a story about yourself.

    If your Ex is really ready to talk then she will apologise too, although the first message or two you receive may be indifferent, emotional or angry. Don’t focus too much on what she says but just that you and her are in contact again.

    I wish you all the best!

    #22759
    rahul
    Blocked
    • Total Posts: 25

    @sparky,
    thanks for you words it really help alot. this is my 6day of NC, and now I feel okay..her birthday will be on 22january. is this good idea to meet her on her b’day..or I have to do something else…please advice, I think she is forgetting me slow and slow as time goes on..

    #22909
    Sparky
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 147

    @Rahul So the 22nd January would be the 23rd day of NC for you right?

    It’s a difficult one. NC is basically there to make you feel better about yourself so that you are not so needy or emotional when dealing with your Ex in future.

    I do not know whether you should contact your Ex on her birthday or not but you certainly shouldn’t be trying to arrange to meet her on that day.

    I would take your lead from whether she contacts you before then. If she does then juat send her a message saying happy birthday and you hope that she is enjoying/has enjoyed her day.

    You may be able to send this message on her birthday even if she hasn’t contacted you before then and go straight back in to NC for another week or so.

    Don’t appear too much of a walk over to her. Let her know that you care but don’t let her think that you will be there for her anytime ahe wants (backup plan).

    Good luck with whatever you decide to do and keep me updated on your progress.

    #22974
    rahul
    Blocked
    • Total Posts: 25

    thanx sparky,
    now I am feeling much good after 7days of NC, Its really help me get all my image back which I lost in during these periods..now I am not feeling desperate or needy …but still I have to improve on me some more to be perfect by my view…apart from this, she didn’t messaged me yet after 31st December. may be she is busy with her own work or with someone..my only wish is that I don’t want to loose her unconditional love for me..may be she still hates me…and yeah I asked for her bday because I’ll be in her city on 22jan. so that I think if its great to meet her on her bday and make her feel great what do you think…give me advice

    #23285
    rahul
    Blocked
    • Total Posts: 25

    here is the new twist her sister also block me on whatsapp…I don’t know why,we didn’t chat after xmas so suddenly why she blocked me..can anyone tell me what do you think whats the reason behind this..
    sparky really need your advice

    #23284
    kalicooldude
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 151

    Rahul @

    I have the same lines that you mentioned below and I tried every possible things from last 6 months to get her back.It can be giving her cards,sorry 1000s times,gifts,flowers etc but she didn’t even bug and very stubborn of not coming back to my life.She chased me for approx. 2 years to get married and now I have been chasing from last 6 months and she is cold,ignorant,non communicative,hates me etc.

    Oh by the way now I am trying to do NC and today is my 13th day and its hard but we got nothing to loose right ?

    I really don’t know what will happen to my situation,just very hopeless but will know after NC

    You said :-
    1. she really hates me
    2. she’s very much angry with me and don’t want to talk.
    3.she never miss me a single moment even if she is online in any messenger
    4.she don’t want to forget all the bad moments held in past.
    5.she filled with all negativity about me…and get irritated with me.

    #23343
    rahul
    Blocked
    • Total Posts: 25

    @kalicooldude
    I really don’t understand how she forget me as she loved me unconditionally. .I dont think my feelings towards her will be diminish..I don’t know what will happen after NC,this is my 10th day. and I don’t think any thing can change our situation… whenever I misses her I only thought if I loose her so she also loose me..and its impossible to forget the memories of your love life..so 1day she’ll definitely miss me..and that’s the only gift of my this my pain…I hope we both get our love soon I really love her..

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