Boards Reconciliation Lost/Stuck in the moment

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Viewing 5 posts - 1 through 5 (of 5 total)
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  • #11976
    paula
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 3

    I’ve never done this before but here it goes..

    I guess now I need some advice because I really don’t know where to go with this anymore. I get friends and family to help but it’s all the same and I need outsiders opinions.

    So me and my boyfriend were together for about 3 years. He broke up with me in March right after I went to go visit him for a week. I decided to move home to go to school and get my degree and graduate and then move back with him, and until then just visit from time to time. so I went to go visit him in march like I said, for about a week or so and then a few days later everything was still great. The trip was amazing and the time we spent, even better. well a few days of me being home we get in a huge fight about trust. He decides to not speak so we go 4 days without talking. I try to communicate, yet he decides not to. He said he needed space, which I gave and then when he decided to talk he ended up leaving me.

    It has been 6 months since I have heard from him, I have tried a few times. not crazy or overbearing, just a few times to reach out to him. NO response. recently I have seen that for the past few months he has creeped on my snapchats/twitter/instagram and then randomly blocks me… before blocking me he followed and unfollowed me a few times and liked and unliked a few things… but even before all of that I reached out one last time and left a nice voicemail. only stating that I wanted to speak with him about things that were reasons for not what he thinks. then all of this started happening.. I have yet to reach out since or even give in to show any response to this behavior of his.

    So basically all of the creeping didn’t start until I left that voicemail and I was wondering if that may have started up something and then he felt crazy about it so he blocked me.. IDK!

    I don’t understand what this means. I want to reach out to him but I just don’t know if that is wise. It has been 6 months and of course everyone tells me to move on. I have accepted the fact that we may never get back together or even speak again. I love him and would do anything for him though. I just don’t know what to do at this point. like I said he hasn’t tried to reach out at all but he’s been looking, like crazy.

    Is this some ploy to see how well I’m doing and he’s trying to compare? Is this his way of showing off that he misses me? Is this his way of trying to get a reaction out of me to see if I still care? Could this be his way of reaching out to me and showing off that he still cares? Or is he just trying to be noisy?

    #11988
    otherone
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 156

    wow it sounds like your ex himself doesnt know what he wants.. id ssay give him more time but damn, 6 months is a while… on the other hand.. i was like you with my ex ex girlfriend.. i wasnt over her for years. still tried to reach out to her, we met up a few times but i always blew it cause i was young and dumb… 5 years later, after my ex and i break up, my ex ex is talking to me again. weve spoke about talking on the phone.. she said she wants to but itll be weird. i think she still has feelings for me and doesnt want to get hurt (ive been asking her for advice/insight about my ex)

    could you help me out with my situation?

    so i broke no contact..

    #12004
    aamls
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 894

    yes 6 months is a long long time. it can mean a lot of things a mixture of a few. you should give it more space and time and see where it goes. you said you “I have accepted the fact that we may never get back together or even speak again.” my question is do you want him back? if you do you should work on having a plan in action to follow whether its your own or the 5 step plan. honestly to me it doesnt sound like hes over you yet but only time will tell. good luck and keep us posted. ๐Ÿ™‚ would you mind reading my post and giving me your opinion? thanks ๐Ÿ™‚

    #12006
    paula
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 3

    @aamls to answer your question. Yes I do want him back, I just don’t know what to do at this point. I’ve done the NC many times over the past 6 months. I’ve reached out and then give a month or two and now I’m going on month two since the last time I’ve reached out. Should I contact him at all? If so, how? And what do I say?

    #12011
    aamls
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 894

    if its been this long since no contact then yes you should. first I think by text. test the waters. I suggest you use one of the texts from the 5 step plan. then go from there. hope this helps. if you have any other questions feel free to ask and I’ll try my hardest to help. good luck and keep us posted. ๐Ÿ™‚

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