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So basically we texted back and forth for a bit. We talked about the condom situation and I told him how I felt. He said he was offended that I checked on him and that I need to learn to trust. I told him I felt scared and unsafe and I’m sorry he didn’t understand how I was feeling. I told him I felt hopeless at the time. Then I excused myself from the conversation and said “anyhow I’m stepping out..It felt good hearing from you” and ended the convo. He didn’t respond after that..what do you think?? Did I do well by ending it?
Yes,you did well.
BUt if you want to get back with him,tell him that you have been thinking and you don’t care what he did/didn’t when you weren’t together.Say that you are both single now and you are both free to do anything you want.And then don’t bring up that subject again.So should I text him tomorrow and tell him I was thinking about our convo and then say what you said? Or wait fir him to text again..IF he does
It would be better to wait until he contacts you.But if you wanna say that,You can text him.And say nothing more than that.Then wait for him to contact you.
Hi a.z please help me to understand the mindset about saying that..I don’t really want him to go out there….what feelings does this trigger for him??
He will understand that you are not obsessed with him,you are not jealous and that you are not worried about what he may be doing when you are not together.
He responded “correct” what does that mean..omg I don’t know what to say it do now???
Girly – continue to be strong and focus on YOURSELF. How are you keeping yourself busy outside of work etc?
I just have a few other questions:
How long have you been broken up with this guy for now (in total)?
Initially after the breakup, did you act needy/beg for him? If so, for how long?
What was the longest period you followed the NC rule?Thanks,
R
I begged a few tines but no more then a day after. We’ve broken up a few times and got back.. It’s a mess now..nc went on several times for about a week at a time
I’m [only] 5 days into my NC, and my mind is going nuts, too. She broke up with me about 5 weeks ago, and I spent nearly a month trying to get her back incessantly. I was very weak. I’m trying to give both her and I some space, and we’ll see what happens when I eventually end up reaching out to her again, which I most definitely will (30 days seems so long…)
I know she’s coming by my place later this week to pick up her mail from the doorman, and I’m trying really hard to not put a [handwritten] letter of my own in there for her to read… or should I? what do you think?
A.z, how bad did I do? I wrote what you told me then it went like this..
Him: correct
Me: I just didn’t want to be lied to.
Him: listen I’m not doing this?
Me: doing what? I’m telling you how I felt not accusing
Him: got it
Me: then why are you upset?
Him: I’m not
Him: I don’t know what you are getting at with this “I have been thinking and i don’t care what you did/didn’t do when we weren’t together.We are both single now and we are both free to do anything we want.” whatever you do is your business
Me: All I meant was that it doesn’t matter I’m not making a big deal of it. We weren’t together. Sorry to have bothered you.
Him: and that’s not accusing?
Me: all I’m saying is that it didn’t matter either way. I wasn’t accusing
Him: ok
Me: I feel upset that you took it that way
Him: ok
Me: I feel sad that you took it this way.
Him: don’t worry about it.
Me: okNow what do I do ??
Richard…from what I know you can send a letter apologizing and agreeing with the break up..and then continue with NC..it should be hand written.
Please start a seperate blog for your situation as the 2 will get mixed up.
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