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I did the NC rule for 30 days and the week before it was over, my ex texted me to wish me a Happy Mother’s Day. I thought that was wonderful so I thanked him and that was it. Seven days later NC ended and I texted him with a message that was subtle yet brought us back to a nice time. He responded and to my surprise, asked me to meet him that night. I wasn’t expecting it. I got very nervous. I didn’t feel ready cause I hadn’t done as much as I wanted during NC (hair, working out, etc). However, I couldn’t say no so I went and bought something to wear and we met. It didn’t go bad but I don’t feel I was exciting and witty like I could’ve been. The conversation flowed and it was ok, but I was nervous. We had drinks and some appetizers for about and hour and a half and then we went back to his car to go to my car. When we got there, he stepped out and gave me a hug. Then he went for a kiss. Again I was fresking out so I just leaned in for a pop kiss. He hugged me again and gave me a second pop kiss. We both said it was nice to see each other but I was so nervous I didn’t say anything else. This was this past Sunday. He hasn’t texted or called me back. What’s worse is that I felt so uncomfortable with the whole thing, I texted him Tuesday with what I thought was a subtle text that would take him back to a fun time again. For the first time ever in the whole year we were together, he did not respond to my text and I haven’t heard from him. I am devastated. I feel like I ruined everything. I can’t contact him because he ignored my text and I feel like I was just not confident in our meeting. I don’t know what’s happened. What do I do? Is this fixable? Please help.
no no thats really nice nothing is ruined please calm down.. all will be good . I think all went good you need to thank him for the nice time and you did enjoy it give it some time like a week or two and text him back .. DON’T PANIC all under control I think you are doing great darling 🙂 .. he only thinking about everything and he might be a bit confused or rethinking about it all over again.. the idea he kissed you and hugged you means he is having still having feeling for you .. all will be good the moment you feel safe comfy and sure its really good.
act as if nothing happened at all he will contact you , it might take time but he will 🙂 trust me he will .. he still care about you if he doesn’t why did he text you or take you out .. you are a beautiful lucky lady and that’s how you should feel.I hope I helped a bit .. am here for you if you need me
Thank you so much Nora. I’m new at posting here so I hope I’m doing this right. Your words helped me a lot. I guess I feel so worried because I wasn’t completely comfortable at our meeting and I know I wasn’t myself. Also, he has never not responded to me and the silence on the other end is unbearable. U can’t believe we wwnt from catching up and him hugging and pop kissing me twice, to him not responding to my text. And not contacting me at all.:( I am so sad and all I do is replay the date in my mind wondering what made him do this. I hope you’re right and he reaches out to me soon. I feel I cannot reach out to him anymore because i just don’t know how he feels or if any contact now would upset him. He’s never done this and I am so confused.
Im new too 🙂 .. I know how you feel Im the same too and I would appreciate your insight too. you are confused because you don’t know whats happening on the other side mind .. thats normal ,, but you need to calm down you replied.. what exactly you text him.. i think he might need another text lets meet up or something less stronger than this to push the conversation maybe what you send doesnt need even a reply.. thats what am telling myself when i text my ex i still getting no reply its killing!! but its a mind game the moment you give up looking is good but the moment you give up on the whole situation you lose it so comfort yourself please you are not alone
Hi Nora. I’d love to give you my thoughts on your situation as well. Are you in NC or do you communicate with your ex? How long were you together? The text I sent my ex didn’t really ask him a question. What I did was to try to bring him back to a good memory in a subtle way. We used to go out boating and one day we both skipped work to go on the boat. It was a very nice day and we were practically the only ones out there. So since he hadnt texted me after our meeting, I just said something like “i would rather be on the boat on the way to the sand bar.. I bet you there wouldn’t be anybody there”. That’s it. He used to talk about that day all the time so I’m shocked that he didn’t respond, and still hasn’t. I don’t get it. Was it bad that I did that? I thoughr he would say something 🙁
no no its a really nice message .. first of all you don’t need to expect he will answer straight away .. its like a plane , easy , nicely and believe it works then launch .. your message is very nice bringing nice memory but he doesnt have anything to say to it so he simply doesnt know what to reply.. next time maybe we change the tactic a little bit we ask him for help or something you need his opinion a real good question that he will answer no matter what.:)
Hi Nora,
I read your situation. It sounds to me like you guys just had some miscommunication that escalated and that’s all that happened. Have you texted him again? I agree that he probably needed some time to cool down. It really is incredible what No Contact can do. He will start to miss you. The Skype incident wasn’t your fault either. I also would have wondered what happened if I had been in the same situation, expecially if you had been feeling insecure for about 3 weeks. Long distance relationships are hard and sometimes we misinterpret what people mean through texts, messages, etc. Give him some time and he’ll come around. If you’ve already apologized then don’t do it anymore. It really wasn’t your fault. Let him miss you and he will come around. Mine still hasn’t called or texted and I feel really down. I finally got my hair done and I feel so bad I didn’t look my best when I met with him. I mean i fixed myself up and everything but I feel like I could’ve done more – especially being a bit happier and flirty with the date. Too late now to change it. Just wish I could have another chance. It’s funny but his birthday is also next month. I read that in your post. I too was wondering whether to text him or not. His is at the beginning though. Well, let me know how things go Nora. 🙂
Well I am texting him on off i am stupid and no I didn’t apologise, after i decide enough i think his ego didnt accept it so the second day he siad ok lets be friends lol but then he texted me 3 days after to ask if am calmer but i replied 3 days after saying yes i am good but i kept acting as friends while he kept asking what have went wrong .. i didnt reply and when i finally open up and send him crossword search using the words love you cuddles , waterbed lol .. he even didn’t text back then i text him explain i dont want to reply about what happen in the past rather talk about future and he is special to my heart and thanked him for being in my life again i get no reply.. i left him 4 days then yesterday i text him happy fridays hope all good he said yes but been working all day. then same today morning .. he said the same but one of his fans emailed me and she is weirdo so i text him on skype since we back friends on it lol ..
I don’t know no reply from his side since then.. i asked him if he can advice me on my PhD which he agree to discuss and he is the one who offered to talk on skype if i want to discuss it.. but again no reply he is all day praying lol.. I do love him a lot he is 51 next wednesday i am 35 but he is a special person and so do I, I don’t really need to be like the other women chasing him or anything like this he knows am very attractive woman so I don’t even need this. so I decide to let it go for now till am done with the PhD as he think I will finish in 2 yrs I told him no 6 month.. I believe I have strong connection with him we didn’t have real intimate relation but …. and I don’t think he do this with everyone on earth that’s why I feel so attached to him I never felt any connection with any man like this before. So I would send him happy Birthday sometimes I say no .. In your case I will say send him Girl 🙂It sounds really hopeful with you. He is continuing the conversation so that’s a very good thing. Mine’s birthday is in about a week and a half so I am trying to hold on and not text him before. lol. It gets a little harder everyday and I want to reach out to him so bad but since he hasn’t replied to my text from 4 days ago, I think I just have to wait it out. I think you’re right. I’ll text him a quick happy birthday message and hope he answers back. Just wish I knew why he never texted me after we met 🙁
Yes hold yourself don’t do like me I ruin everything lol .. I keep saying stupid things or only be professional talking to him and sometimes i lose it so don’t do like me DONT TEXT till his birthday and he will reply and i think even you might be out and guess what you are ready now 😀 beautiful lady 🙂
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