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Posts
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I feel like absolute horse poop
Was so awkward and slow like chalk scraping across a chalkboard
Not how I planned it to go!!!I’m sure you were great. Don’t worry. The important this is that you contacted him and he responded. Now give it a few days, maybe even a week. Let him be curious about you!
Okay, will wait it out and see what happens but don’t think enough build up was made, talked for an hour and a half but was so slow.
Until something happens – Day 1 of NC lol!!!!!Yes, just stay quiet for a few days unless be replies. Let him initiate contact this time.
So I initiated contact after 52 days no contact.
We talked day for about an hour and a half and didn’t think it was successful.The next day he initiated contact in the morning.
We talked (nothing to do with relationship – jokes/fun stuff) for about 6 hours – slowly paced through the day.should I initiate contact today or leave it? – Not heard anything from him yet
How are you doing pixie25? Are you back on NC? Or did he reach out to you? I hope, whatever the case, that you are doing well and being strong. Good luck!
Hey SM.
I’m okay, how are you? Was kinda sad when I read you wouldn’t be coming back!!!
I am now back in no contact yes, third day.
We spoke four times last week, taking it in turns to initiate but it gets to a Monday morning fresh week and he does what he normally does, gets bored I guess and never contacts again until I do.
I realised last week that him replying me and talking to me like old times, is not a good scenario. At this rate I’ll never move on and he probably doesn’t want me to. It’s been seven months, barely a phonecall, one meeting. The rest is just texting. This is a sign he doesn’t want me, I’ve just finally read the sign!!!!
How’s everything with you? Any news?It definitely would have been better if he hadn’t replied.
Back to the stage of longing for him to contact me, whereas 52 days in, I was in a better place.
Its pathetic – why do we do it!!! lolUpdate on my situation
i’ve been in a mess these last three weeks. Phone within reach, hoping for replies. In the last three weeks we’ve talked 9 days out of 21, usually the conversations last all day. Sometimes he’s initiated, but the last few times have been me. Currently 3 days without contact.
I’ve decided I’m bored of this, I’m sick to death of making myself feel like this, it’s been 7 months and I should have moved on by now, instead I’ve put myself back to square one. I read an article about texting your ex which basically said texting is the laziest form of communication so that’s put the last 6 months of texting (less the NC periods) into absolute perspective. He’s hardly phoned.
He doesn’t want me and I shouldn’t have to persuade!
Hope you’re doing OK SM, looks like you haven’t been on here in a while so well done for moving on 🙂Dear Pixie25, how are you doing? I HOPE you will not contact your ex again, and I hope you’re feeling stronger and better every day. I’m SO glad you feel bored and sick and tired of feeling as you have done for the last seven months. I DO TOO!!! And this is the best sign that you’re ready to move on, and to leave you ex behind. I’m very glad to be back in touch with my ex myself (I wrote an update on my original post) but only because he wrote nicely, and apologized for having been out of touch for so long. I DO NOT WANT HIM back, on any account, and I consider it a personal victory of sorts that I really genuinely feel that. I’m very happy to be single and free now. And if, somewhere down the line, I meet someone else wonderful and special, then I’ll be happy too. But every option is better than what i’ve had for the last seven months, which is pining after a man who does not love me or value me the way I loved and valued him. I deserve better, and so do you , Pixie 25. Even if he does write to you now, don’t respond till you feel like you don’t care. Really. And reach out here if you need to feel some support and solidarity. I’m thinking of you, and hoping you can turn the corner soon, if you haven’t already. I have, and it feels wonderful. A weight off my back. NO MORE TEARS!
Hi SM,
Thought you wouldn’t be back here! I cant believe he wrote back!
Be careful though, don’t let him get back into your head. It’s happened to me.As for me, Well the day after I wrote that message above, he text me first (lots of messages) wishing me happy birthday and we’ve been talking regularly every day or so. I don’t know what to do, I’d love to tell you I’m feeling strong but I’m not.
He’s being consistently flirty and mentions sex and meeting up. I play hard to get, move off those kind of subjects but tease him, control the conversation as much as I can. No suggestions are actually materialising into anything. He hasn’t picked up the phone to actually talk to me in 5 months and he isn’t just coming out and asking me to meet up on particular date, its like he’s either testing the waters or just testing me!
What should I do – I’ve initiated conversation for the last four conversations. Maybe I should just ask him to meet again (not for sex btw!) and see what happens.
Another thing, he seems to get angry at me sometimes.
I was talking about being being friends and not flirting and he got so pissy with me. He messaged me saying I wind him up so its only fair he winds me up too.This is all so toxic lol 🙁
Hi Pixie25 it’s nice to hear from you though I’m very sorry that your situation is so difficult and toxic, to use your word. I so wish I could help. The only thing i can say is that – without knowing your ex at all – it does sound like he is interested, or at least thinking anbout it, and confused in his mind about what he wants. It is an encouraging sign that he texts you, and flirts with you. But I dont know him at all. It would be terrible if he were just doing that to play with you, or to feel better about himself. I really hope for your sake that that’s not the case. If it is, then he is NOT worth it, girl, he really isn’t. It’s a terrible thing to do to someone, to give them false hope when you know they care for you. But, if it’s actually true that he is confused and unsure of his feelings – and I hope that is the case – then I think it would be best for you to step back, and stop texting, and not initiate anything for now. Let him know that you’d like to meet when he’s ready, and leave it at that. NO MORE texts. Then, when you actually meet – and I hope that will be soon – follow Kevin’s plan. Check back in here for support and encouragement!
And be strong, and don’t reach out to him again. Maybe this is all a good sign!
Maybe you will be able to get him back/ Or maybe, even better, through all this pain and ups and downs, you will come to the conclusion, on your own, that he’s not worth it/amnd you will walk away from him, not because that’s the way to “get him back”, but because you really want to. No one can predict that. But for now, stay true to your instincts, and step away.
As for me, no updates since I last wrote: I replied to him, and we exchanged two emails (each), and he hasn’t responded to mine. But I don’t want him back. I love him dearly, and I think about him all the time, but I will not let myself run after him again. But in my case, in many ways, it is so impossible anyway: he lives half way across the world. So , even if he wanted to, and I know he doesn’t, there is no hope, I don’t think, for us.
Keep writing here Picie25 if it helps you and I’ll be thinking of you and hoping for the best of all possible outcomes for you!One question: when you were together, did he communicate via taxt, or was he more regularly calling you? It might just be that he prefers texts to actual calls? In which case I wouldn’t read too much (negative) into the fact that he’s only texting and not calling.
It’s great that he remembered your birthday and wished you for that – I’m wishing you too! – and I hope that made you feel a bit happy?Hi SM,
No we used to text and call most days. However interestingly he phoned me yesterday.To be honest I think he’s playing with me but at least I am seeing the signs.
We’ve talked non stop for 3/4 days in a row. Yesterday he phoned me for the first time in months and we talked for an hour and a half.
Then today I was telling him a story/gossip over text and it was loooooong so lots of texts. But he seemed really distant today like he’s now bored and hasn’t responded so I’ve just left it and turned off my phone. Just feel stupid and embarrassed again now because I went fully into texting him and to get no response was a bit shitty. Feel like i’ve done the thing Kevin tells you not to, to not bombard with texts! – but after yesterday I thought he was interested!
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