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Good luck mate! I know that my EX is playing games with me and that she is testing me. When I make a little step forward she is pulling up defenses, but when I move away the she is trying to pull me back. I’m really exhausted and tired of this game. There are momements when I want to start dating someone else just to let her feel how it is when somebody flush your feelings and everything you do for this person in the toilet and only a fear that I could lose her definetly is stopping me from doing so…

First of all Patricia, thank you for your answer! Honestly I wasn’t even expecting nobody to answer me, but I felt better after writing this post as it has helped me to sort out my own thoughts.

She is not a bad person, otherwise I wouldn’t bother to even think about saving this relationship. We had really wonderfull 3 years togheter, before everything when downhill. She is good person, I think she is just lost and she doesn’t know what she wants. That’s why I’ve started no contact – so both of us can have some space and chill.

There is one more thing I forgot to mention. My ex has one best girl friend. She knows her already for 12 years (including few years no contant – when my ex’s life was in mess). This woman is comming to us since two years for 6-7 months to work in Germany and we are renting her a room.

So the problem with this girl is that she is extremely toxic person. She is 40 y.o. and she doesn’t have a man since over 10 years. She is changing jobs and moving all the time. I could shortly describe her as very negative, jealous, loudly complaining person. She is also a lier and she tries to impress everyone with her crazy stories, “connections”, friends that nobody has ever seen etc.

When I think now about it, I started to argue with my ex for the first time, when this girl started to live with us. She was also very negative towards me from the beginning. One time she said that my ex is not a woman for me. I must point out here that she is very fussy when it comes to men (probably this is a reason why she is alone) – she is waiting for a Brad Pitt with red Ferrari, while the truth is that she is unatractive woman without any ambitions. She doesn’t have any friends so in one moment she has taken over my ex and I even felt that she is jealous for her. We even argued about this, because my ex was spending more time with her than with me.

This girl is also the one who has organised a new work for my ex, so they can work togheter in their country. She also wants to rent an apartament togheter with her. Now, I know that reasonable person wouldn’t let some “friend” to ruin his/her relationship for no reason. Just like I understand, that if our relationship was healthy it would have never happened.

But I’m still confused – should I just let her go with her and focus on myself? I mean this woman is a lier and I’m sure that at least half of the things she has promised to my ex is a lie. It makes me so sad, that she will be so dissapointed, because she is already in the dream about how nice life style she will have and she is so excited about moving out that she doesn’t even see that she is being manipulated.

Ps. Yesterday I broke no contact. I have recieved a fantastic contract for the next two years. I was sooooo happy and I just wanted to celebrate it so I made a wonderful dinner for my ex and her “best” friend. Guess what? All I heard from this woman was – that the dinner is sh*, my contract is sh*, and complaints about her new job (which I have organised for her because she was unemployed). I just ate fast and I said “thanks for the nice evening”. Lesson taken.