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Patricia12 So within the 2 years that we were broken up I did everything I set on my Vision Board to do. I met my ideal weight at 142, moved into my own place, got my non profit in two schools and one after school program, got certified as a lash technician, and graduated from business school.
Yes, he lives with his mother but there are legal reasons for that being at this time. He does have a good paying job and actually got an even better one two weeks ago. I believe his intentions are good and he does want a family as we’ve talked about this since reconnecting but both agreed wanted to be financially secured before making any major steps.
Yesterday he invited me out to a bar to watch the McGregor/Mayweather fight. The bar was too crowded so we ended up at his cousins whom I met before during our dating days.
My heart tells me he is the one and to take it slow but every now and again I have that small voice saying “don’t waste your time”.
Yes, quality time is my love language and I do see him as often as we both can (he works from 4:30 a.m.- 6pm and my work schedule varies) but I truly believe fear sets in. More so fear of getting hurt again or fear of wasting my time when I could have found someone else.
I DEFINITELY don’t cancel dates with my friends or anything (no man is worth ditching my friends) and if I’m busy but he wants to hang out I give options (A. Get at him when I’m done or B. reschedule for another time).
We are both in our 30s and come from the same background. We both value family and God as the center of everything.
Maybe the issues are all in my head (duh) and like you said before maybe he’s taking it slow which we didn’t do first go round.That’s pretty much my thought process. Wanting to know where we stand because I definitely don’t wanna waste time. Too many fishes in the sea for all that. The next time we talk I’ll converse it in that way. Thank you for this help KR!
So we have been talking per say right at 3 months now. When we did have a chance to sit down and talk I asked why he broke up with me? He indicated it was because he wanted to see what else was out there and didn’t know how to tell me without hurting my feelings. He also sayed there were things that are required in a relationship which he didn’t know nor understand back then.
As far as sex we really don’t do that. Most times we are at his house and since he stays with his mother I mainly talk to her since she and I have a great relationship. When we are at my house we just chill and lay in the bed.
I will definitely ask him because going on not knowing is starting to take affect. In the beginning I thought we were taking the steps to create a better relationship. Now I’m not so sure.Thank you so much coolman! Don’t give up…give her time. My ex was hot and cold with me for a minute. I eventually let him go, focused on me and bettered myself. During the time I guess our no contact really help him see things differently. He had a new girlfriend and everything but I guess he realized the grass wasn’t so greener. So give her time, focus on you. She’ll come back…especially if it’s worth it.
This insight really help me and answered some pondering questions. Thank you so much!
My businesses have been booming so I’ve been so busy but it’s truly a blessing. Yea, no moping for me. I know my happiness is out there! ?Hey Patricia, it’s been awhile since we’ve talked. Had some time to think about everything and questions came to mind that maybe you could answer.
The first would be why would he continue texting me if he and the lady friend were now an item?
Secondly, why would my ex agree to show me how to play spades? (Although he never set a date)
Why would he stress during our meet up that he wasn’t tied to anyone?
Lastly, why would he give me his email address?
Trust me, I don’t expect you to have all the answers and I’m certainly not moping around in pain and heartbreak but those questions just came to mind. Hope all is well and stay blessed!
It’s ok and thank you Patricia for all your help! Crazy part is I’m hurt but not as heartbroken as I’d thought I would be. I’ll just focus even more on my businesses and whenever love comes again I’ll embrace it.
Again thank you so much and blessings to you as well ?So he responded via text indicating he did see the email but told me he has a lady. So I let him know I’ll leave him alone.
Well I guess I was giving him enough time to read it and think things through. Don’t wanna seem like I’m rushing him.
Yea, thought about reaching out between today and tomorrow but again didn’t wanna seem like I’m rushing him.Hey Patricia,
Still no response and I haven’t reached out yet to see if he read the email because it hasn’t been a week. I’m still in a good positive mindset (even though a small part wants to say forget it). If I get a response I’ll let you know. Fingers crossed ?I’m hoping a happy ending as well!! I decided email versus text because it’s more informal and yes, it also gives him time to think about it and respond with what’s really on his heart… not rushed responses.
I would say try email. Take your time and think about what you want to say. I’m sure she’ll appreciate it and just let her know you sent her something via email.He checks it for the latest FootLocker updates. He’s a tennis shoe fanatic. Yea, I’ll see if he checked it on Tuesday or Wednesday. Got mine crossed too!!!
Hey Patricia,
No, I haven’t ?. I pray I hear from him though. I wanted to text and tell him to check his email but I know he checks it periodically for shoes so I’m hoping he saw it.
