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Hi All,
My ex girl friend already married now to someone with one of her third cousins.She kept me as back up.
My love story is over now and moral of the story is if you go thru break up,you should set up timelimit to get back.If your partner doesn’t come in that certain period please move on with your life.
I spent 2/5 years of my life trying to get love back of my life and I mean really tried and now she is already married.After the break up my efforts were 99 % and her was 1 %
I made myself really fool and she moved on and already married.Its fine god is great.
Hi Anth,
Thanks for reply.Sorry for confusion.My ex g/f gave me mixed signals,i mean she went out with me out to city a month back and let me hold her hands and kiss on side.And called more often like 1/2 times in day.
Her mother was sick so I went to hospital with flowers,and all of the sudden she said oh lets do engagement on oct 1st I was little surprise and shocked but same time,I knew that she is not been staying on her words and as well her actions.
Sept 15- Lets do engagement.
Sept 15- Trip to city.
Sept 23- Looking for dresses.
Sept 26 or I guess 27- Looking for rings( I didn’t buy her ring so she was pissed off as she expected me to buy her ring same day) I said you can pick one and I will buy before Oct 1st.She became very pissed off & angry.
Sept 29- I called her and she said don’t come for Engagement,now its too late.Oct 1st- She puts picture of guy first alphabet, which is the same alphabet of her also new guy(who is her 3rd cousin,comes from her mom side)
Guy goes in Facebook and says(Thanks for coming into my life love you-so much)Oct 9th- I try to say hello to her and she is like (Her wedding is been fixed and her family is happy and as well she is,i hope you understand) I said are you marrying to same guy who commented on your facebook picture she said YES.
After that I never spoke to her or said anything at all.
Oct 8th- Guy puts Facebook profile picture where he is holding her and they are dressed, people friends gave them congratulations and happy couple messages.
Thanks Anth,i hope we get peace and love again in our life,It just hurts so much and I have turned to be so hopeless and unromantic guy.
Hi Elanna & Fishing.
Thanks for the comments,i am fine with my life but all I am SURPRISED is that this girl has not putten 1 % effort from her side during this break up,99 % efforts were me and I was her target to get mad,angry or pissed off with no reasons and take the past anger at me.
But this girl has also came to see me or talk with me on her mood,i cant understand is that 2 weeks back she told me that we will get engagement done on Oct 1st and also went with me to see rings and dresses she will wear,again when we were looking she started fighting with me as I told salesperson about my budget.
and she also went out with me to city 4 weeks back where she did hold my hand and kissed me not on lips.
So how come this girl moved on so quick to relationship with this person or wedding,keeping this girl comes from very typical muslim background.Also I see this new guy that she claims is getting married,comes from same background and he had consoled her all this year which is visible at her facebook page.Now the guy also have profile picture at facebook with her,and friends gave them congrats for happy life.
My concern is she is with me 2 weeks back looking for rings and now all of the sudden this guy came to picture and she tells me her family is happy so she is happy there too.
I am confused as hell but same time looking at there picture on facebook gave me peace and strength to move on.
Hi Elena,I have not given up from last 2/5 years and trust me I did a lot,she was always pissed,angry,distant and never respected me.She treated me like shit.I have gifts,apologies,bday present,good with her family,worked on myself,controlled my anger but she never saw any changes in me and remain same cold and distant,I said her I love you every time we talked or met but she never said I love you too.Now she said her family fixed her wedding and they are happy and she is happy because they are happy.What do you want me to do now,cry to her or beg to come back or tell her to rethink,all this doesn’t make sense to me,keep in mind she is happy and after so much of my wait & love if I can’t get her back I don’t think it will make sense,I have to let her go.I am tired and heart broken with this mixed feelings and confused behavior of her from last 2/5 years.Now she has decided to move on with other guy so it’s fine !
Please read my thread before you say your suggestions.
My g/f and I dated for 4 years and it was 100 % from her side,mine was less as I had lot going on with my ex wife.
My g/f wanted to marry me like crazy and said everyday,she wants to marry me.I couldn’t do that time as I still had case pending with my ex wife.
Around June 2014 I blocked my g/f for 2 weeks and things were never same.She was not the same girl anymore she went distant,pissed off,mad,confused and kept telling me move on.Well I never loose hope,i tried tried tried it can be her bday gifts,valentine,talking to her sister,family,finding excuses to talk with her
She kept giving me mixed signals for 2 years and never said I love you but she did talk about marriage once in while or came see me or came my home.
Last month her mother was sick,i went to check on her mother and gave flowers,so my g/f said she wants to get engagement done on Oct 1st her mom bday.I said Ok and I was surprise,well we had fight again and keeping all the fights happened in 2 years it was from her side I never inititated.
Now I she has picture on facebook with her family friend last week and this week the guy put new picture looks like engagement and everyone giving them congrats as happy couple.
2 weeks I try to say hello on her and she my family has fixed my wedding and I should understand.
We come from very different religions and I have baggage with divorce,daughter.She was single and no baggage.
Now I am confused that like 2 weeks she was looking for ring with me in mall and putting dresses on,now all of the sudden what happen ?
But 2 years she has done is fight,went distant,not talked with me for months,blocked me few times.
I am broken and now have no clue about my love life or future.I really loved this girl and also proved my love during this break up time.
Please advise.
kalicooldudeAfter long wait of 2 years I gave up on more trying,tried everything possible to get her back.
Now no more trying,if it is not meant to be,no matter how hard you try it won’t come to you.
Good Luck to all my friends and broken heart ones.
Wish you all speedy recovery and moving towards better future.
Now,i feel that once the serious relationship goes thru break up phase and it is more than 6months to year and there is no patch up,your chances are almost none.
Yup ! I agreed with you,it is soo tough.I am very scared to do final closure and not sure how I will handle it or she would come and meet me in person,i highly doubt she will come and see me or I might just have to talk when she comes on her own to see me.I am sure she cant handle final closure too.
But one thing is there,that it is very tough road ahead but there are good people also around,i never knew that after my divorce with my ex wife that I will fall in love again and find such a nice girl,same thing I am not sure what my future holds but we all need to keep going on this life journey.
Good luck my dear Anth I know how it feels to be find replacement for love or try to show that you are happy,but I know you sincerely tried at your end.
Should I email her to meet up and discuss this ?
or just wait for her to call me and talk about setting up a time to meet if she agrees,of course with her available time and if she is willing to meet up ?
Thanks Anth for your kind words.Yes I have lived for almost 18 months with torture and taking stress of it every day,every minute.My ex has played this game for so long now,I know this has to an end.I am and will not regret it anymore because I did tried my best and waited patiently for so many months,i don’t think I would have to prove my love anymore to her.I am exhausted,tired and gave up already.
Yes it is to consider that as everyone have suggested I will talk to her one last time and check if she can meet up for coffee or something and than move with my serious conversation,if she comes back to reconcile its Ok if she doesn’t I am already working and getting attached to this new girl which is long distance for now but she is willing to come and move with me to california.She loves me a lot and give me respect which I deserve.
And also if my ex doesn’t want to meet for serious conversation I will get an answer that she is not interested to take this relationship further or forgot past or may be she is optimistic about future with someone else coming or have in her life.
Thanks Dear Anth,appreciate it very much.
This new girl gave me hope again,it might take some time but I am ready for her.
Also,my ex best friend (only one)she had fight with her…so that might be one of the reason my ex is atleast calling me once in week now,otherwise last 4/5 months she never did called me I was the one who emailed her and she replied in 1/2 words for it and called or not called me in months.
Just letting you know her behavior from last several months !
I understand Elanna but don’t you think she should think twice about my efforts,i have cried everyday for 1/5 years and waited for her email or phone call,I could not communicated with her anytime.I begged,apologized,sorry,flowers,run behind her car,cried like baby,took care of her family,made so many changes in myself.
Not sure what you want me to do,i can try picking up her call in future and use an excuse that I was in movie so I never got her calls,in case she tells me that she has called me.
Yes that’s true I am also diverting myself in other girl,she does loves me a lot and end of the day I have to be with someone who loves me not someone who treats me like shit and punish me for something which was not done intentionaly.
My ex g/f is very stubborn and I might have problem in future,i really don’t want to fuck up my life 2nd time now.I am very scared.
Please give me thoughts,and if you want I can go at valentine and talk seriously,but not sure its been soooo long ELANNA.
Anytime,I met my ex g.f I told her that I want to settle now,lets get married or can we meet more often or atleast do texting please.
She knows I am single father and it is soo hard for me to do everything,plus I already have been thru hell with my ex wife for 4 years and now she is making my life hell.
Atleast when I told her that I cant marry or took her granted but I have legal lawsuits to handle and also atleast I was meeting her everyday,we had sex,watch movies,stayed together,lunch dinner,texts,phone calls,hugs and all.And I also gave her ring and introduced to my daughter and my parents long time back.
In my case she just made me feel that I am not capable and missed the opportunity when she was begging me and not it is too late to start or for her to get back to relationship.And it hurt so much that she didn’t communicated with me and always kept me hanging where in my case I always told her that I will do get married but after my lawsuits gets settled with my ex-wife.I also met her everyday every minute.
I am just tired Elanna and been doing this from last 1/5 years and my life is so hard already,i have no time left for games and waiting with no directions where I am heading.
She doesn’t have to prove me her love but her intentions that’s it and I have no hard feelings for her.I hope it works out but if not I am getting prepared for worst,which in case wont be tough as its been soo long of wait anyways with no firm answer from her.
Well,Elanna…She told me that she will get new car and remember she even asked me for ride,which I gave her,same day she started fighting with me for no reason.
But,i was surprised that she did got a brand new car and never informed me about it,i understand she don’t want to brag about it but atleast she should have informed me that she got the new car,i just have been just happy about it.
No I am not in mood of serious conversation,i think too mature to tell that what is going wrong here.
Here is what she does :-
Calls me 1 times in average 7/10 days.
Meet me 1 time in 2 months and than fight same day.
I have asked her numerous times to meet and go for coffee she has refused it from last 1/5 years.
I have asked her literraly begged and requested that ( can we do text) she says NO and never respond to my text if I do just in case.
I cant call her but she can call me anytime she is FREE and Available.Long story short I am tired,By not picking up her calls I want her to know that I am now serious and there is no BS.There is no more time given and no friendship zone or back up.
Either you come back with plan to get married or not,I have no time left to prove myself,i am really old and all my friends have been settled with 2/3 kids.I plan to get settled and have good future,not kept waiting for more months/years,keeping I have really putten effort to show her that I love her and been done that from last 1/5 years.
Update
My ex g.f purchased a brand new car like 9/10 days back and she never informed me,of course I am not in her list,her sister told me on text.Anyways as I am slowly giving up and I was pissed that she didn’t even tell me the good news of her car.
Yesterday(Sunday) as usual she called me after may be 11 days of course with her mood and timeline.
This time yesterday in 1/5 years I got the courage of not picking up her call,i ignored her 4 missed calls and didn’t return call back.
She does this manipulation all the time of calling or meeting anytime she wants too and I cant call her or text her,only I have to wait for her call to come,if I wanted to talk I have to email her.
Very tired of this behavior so now I took a stand of not working with her mood/schedule if she comes back its Ok if she doesn’t it was not meant to be.
Let me know your thoughts ?
I will not returned or pick up her call until and unless she wants to come back to relationship,no more BS…period it has to end its long long time of suffering and hurting myself !
