clindseynz

Have you had anymore progress? are you doing no contact?
my situation kinda similar mate.. she really wanted the kids and marriage thing, which I totally understand. im now 38 and shes 37 so time isn’t on her side. I thought I would want to have kids with her but as time went on I just wasn’t sure ( I already have 2 boys of my own who both really liked her)
that was the big problem, well that and im shit at communication..but otherwise it was good.
We both came to the decision that we might have to break up for her to chase her dream of having a child. It killed me to see her go but thought I was doing the honourable thing you know. She moved away back to stay with her parents needed some space. We kept in contact and things but a few months ago she said she had to cut ties in order for her to move on which was fair enough…all the while I was back home just going through the motions. Anyway she has told me now she is starting to date again and it absolutely destroyed me…just like you…couldn’t eat, couldn’t go to work….walking around in a daze. Felt like I was in mourning like she had died almost…worst feeling ever. Told her I was heartbroken. But rang her and managed to say through my tears that she deserves to be happy.
but really…I want her back so bad…I took awhile to step back and think about things…just so it wasn’t jealousy overwhelming my emotions. Its been a couple weeks and I can honestly say I still love her…but…what now???
I really do want her to be happy but much rather that happiness be with me. I haven’t been in contact she has no idea I want her I think so really don’t know my next move..don’t want to push her further away ya know?