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She told me originally that it was her not me. When we have sat down since we discussed our relationship and we discussed spending too much time together. We didn’t do much else than spend time together. No hobbies no tine apart. Which I see as unhealthy now. We no longer work together which should help.
I’m gonna give her a bit of space now and back off. See if I can get back myself a little! And see if she reached out? Hopefully so because it seems as it’s me doing most the initiating of contact in the last few days!! Is she drifting away??
Yes your correct we argued because of routine and lately it’s been because I was persuading her and pushing her. And arguing about the fact she lied about the other guy. I’m not fond of lies and I know she isn’t either!!
What a mess!!
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I think I have not really changed! I think the only thing is we have never argued before so that is obviously different for her. We just got on all the time.
She told me it’s her not me as to why we are breaking up and and that we have smothered each other by becoming too routined and spent too much time together. Which is true. I agree with that.
Yeah I understand about the other guy. Just worried he will spend tome with her and change that.We normally talk about our day how family is and what we have been upto.
I spoke to her yesterday and have decided to give her a few days break to see if she contacts me first.and maybe miss me?We have had conversations about reuniting but often heated ones or where I’m pushing getting back together. She keeps saying we argue too much when we are together and that’s why it’s not a good idea?
I have tried to cool things down when we speak now and haven’t argued with her. She just seems very cold at the moment and I’m not sure how to turn this around or if I can??
Hi thank you for the reply!!
And no worries about the questions!!
Yeah I understand she feels like she isn’t coming home due to her own reasons.
We have mainly argued about her rebound as she hid it from me after telling me she wouldn’t see anyone else and didn’t
want me to see anyone else either! She once told me she wanted to get back together with me but did t tell me she was still seeing this guy. . After the arguments she made more contact with me I don’t know why??She is still texting me and we text daily and call a bit. It’s more me initiating the contact than her. Probably 70/30 split.
It’s just what I do now. Go no contact or keep in contact and keep it light and let her feel more comfortable with interacting with me!
What would you suggest??We have owned our house for 2 years!! It’s in joint names together. If things don’t work out I guess that’s what I’ll have to do!!!
Yeah I’ll ignore the subject and concentrate on good things.
Her friends are new ones who haven’t been in the picture for that long and honestly don’t have her best interests at heart in my view. She seems to care more for their opinion than mine at the moment!I am35 she is 27 so a little different. I’m not sure if this is a problem it never had been!!
She has changed her reasons every week. Initially because it was her not me. Then it’s because we argued too much when we saw each other mainly due to her actions!! I’ve had them all different day different reasons.
She seems really confused in her own behavior and is acting totally different to her normal self in my eyes and others!!
That’s why I’m so confused!!
Yeah I think I’ll keep to casual texts and calls at the moment!!Hey thank you!
I can afford to stay in the house. I’m just concerned if she wants to sell up! She currently pays half the mortgage which we have mutual agreed too. I think I will just offer to pay everything if she doesnt want to pay. And give her time to think.
Yeah I agree I think it will take time. I think her new best buddies have also not helped the way she thinks/ feels about me as they are all single with no commitment. I am a few years older than her which makes me worry!
Yeah good advice on the other guy. It annoys me because we know each other. But I know I can’t control what she thinks of him.
I will keep in light contact but will only do this every few days.It feels frustrating that she has these thoughts of me at the moment. She says I’ve changed and am not the person she feel in love with. Maybe this will fade with time.
I just want to meet up with her with her guard down and bring her normal self. I think we both would re connect then!!
I hope that makes sense???
Hi yeah she has moved back in with her dad!!. I am still living in our joint home. We have been living apart since December 2019. We can’t agree on what to do next with the house. We kinda skirt around the issue! And then argue.
I haven’t discussed her mother with her since the break up. I was just trying to think about why she clams up! I thought it might be because she struggled to discuss her feelings!!
Yeah your right about trying to convince her it hasn’t helped so far.
The new guy is frustrating as he is totally opposite to me and that frustrates me.
Should I stay in contact with her it go no contact? That’s what I’m struggling to figure out. I’m worried no contact will distance each other even more than we are. Currently we just texting casually everyday not talking about the relationship.Very unsure on what to do??
