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But if he was trying to get my attention or get me back, why wouldn’t he come right out and say it instead of making me jealous? He could simply ask me out and get a yes…no need for such a show! I don’t see the need for jealousy.
Also, if he is actually trying to get my attention, why not text me or something? Seems a lot easier lol..
I’ve been chasing him and he doesn’t come to me even when we didn’t talk for two months during NC and for two weeks most recently. He hasn’t messaged me first in almost four months, since before the breakup. Pretty sure he’s trying to get over me, but I’m trying to get him back soooo can’t let that happen..
Okay, it’s been a week and he still hasn’t initiated? How long am I supposed to wait? I really don’t think he’s going to make the first move at this point.
Finland, yes when we were together we texted constantly and talked every day without fail. He initiated 90% of the time. I almost never had to text first.
Redvelvet, I get what you’re saying, but you have to understand if he thought of me in a girlfriend sense and wanted to get back with me, he would just ask me out and I wouldn’t be on this board. The whole point is trying to reconcile and get your ex back, you know what I mean? So obviously right now he doesn’t want to get back together. My goal (much like everyone else on here, I assume) is to change his mind there…so that’s why I’m saying I need to figure out how to have him text me first. If I just don’t initiate..and he doesn’t initiate..then nothing happens. No progress. No moving forward. Gotta try to change his mind – again, if he wanted to get back right now, we’d already be dating again lol..
Redvelvet, the problem is, I’m afraid he won’t initiate if I don’t because he’s really busy right now with work and other stuff. We went two months after the breakup without speaking because neither of us texted. That doesn’t really get me anywhere in getting him back, you know? He already told me he still has feelings for me so I know he cares. So I’m okay initiating, but I’d like to get to a 50/50 split. Any advice would be great!!
Hi Paulie. I’m finding it works okay! I haven’t really had a chance to use most of the texts yet since he hasn’t responded consistently. I’m hoping I can start using more of them soon. Good luck to you as well. 🙂
Try sending a reach-out text that doesn’t have anything to do with the relationship. If you get back in contact, talk about things she likes, favorites foods/TV shows/movies, things she has been up to, ask about her family/work/school/hobbies. Discuss things that show you take an interest in her and care about what she’s up to. Don’t say too much about the breakup or make her feel pressured. Good luck!
What was the text you sent? Maybe I can help you! I’ve certainly read enough on this topic in the past few months haha..
Thanks so much for your kind words and for reading my other posts! 🙂 I actually have used NC to better myself and fix the things about my behavior that contributed to the breakup. I feel very confident and have been flirted with, asked for my number, and asked out just in the time since the breakup. I have no doubt I could get a date with someone anytime. It’s more that I just want HIM and no one else lol. The reason I don’t think he will see me as needy is one of the things he complained about was I didn’t give him ENOUGH attention during our relationship. If anything, giving him less now will only make it worse – know what I mean? I want to show him I’ve changed in many aspects, and one of those is being more devoted and committed.
He’s definitely not dating anyone else. His best friends talk to me every day and keep me updated. It’s pretty nice having an inside view of what’s going on.
I hope someone on here is in my situation and can give me some hope!
Thank you for sharing your story! I’m trying to stay positive. I hope I can get him back.
I definitely want him back and have been following the program. My NC period just ended and I was going to reach out, and then I discovered the untagging. Can I still reach out??
Hell yeah, I’m not giving up either! I have so many people telling me to move on, find someone else, fish in the sea, blah blah blah. Thank you for the motivational post, and here’s to all the people here working hard to get back with their true loves!
Thank you for getting back to me! Crossing my fingers and being patient. 🙂 By the way, if you have a success story where this worked for you, I’d love to hear it!
