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while we were together he told me a friend of his leaked my friend’s nudes. i wanted to tell her right off the bat, but he didn’t want me to, as he didn’t want anything happening between him and his friend, but i told him if she ever asked i wouldn’t lie to her.
it was definitely on my conscience. i don’t regret telling her, but he went all ‘i’m glad i broke up with you you’re unreliable i can’t trust you’ and just went off.
continued NC. haven’t talked since. been moving on, actually, thanks to NC. i still miss him but it’s been getting easier.
I did. I stopped talking to him since that event i last mentioned. he called me last night, angry over something I did (which was indirectly related to him, and completely unintentional.) anyway, i didn’t pick up as i was asleep. this morning, i respond, he asks why i did what i did, i calmly explain, he gets really angry, tells me we’re done and that he hopes i never contact him ever again after this block. he proceeds to block me before i could say much else.
what i did was that i told a friend of mine something he had told me, in confidence, because it was very important to let her know. i trusted her to not tell anyone, but then she did, and it bounced back to him.
i assume he was very angry that i breached his trust, even though we had previously agreed upon that if she asks about this certain thing i would morally have to tell her.
i am continuing NC. do you think there’s still a chance? from what I know he no longer cares about me and is over me.
he has BPD, something I forgot to mention. small things just set him off so easily and ever since I broke the trust it’s been getting more and more volatile. he blocked me again the other day because I made one mildly snappy comment and then he got mad and blocked me. I made the mistake and tried to reach out on another account, and his reasoning for finally being done was just that he can’t do this anymore, that I should just accept that and move on. I was a desperate idiot in his messages and cried and all that, and he told me just to please stop messaging him. that it’s over. I finally gave up and told him I accept it. my last message to him was ‘(i’ll always love u maybe as just a friend if u ever need someone to talk to or u ever want to rework things out i mean we can always discuss but yeah ill leave u be for now and wont message u again)’
anyway, do you think I fucked up irreparably? is there still hope? should I give up? should I start NC? please give me some advice.
yup well I screwed up. he had another mood swing, blocked me all over again and then I made the mistake of just begging for him back and crying in his messages basically. really bad. really desperate, and he told me that we’re done for good and I should just move on.
should I just start NC all over again? is it possible to recover from this?
really far, different continents. we plan on most likely reuniting once corona ends and we see each other. I won’t initiate contact with him much, to give him his time and space.
If you think you are great candidates for getting back together, why are you doubting his love for you?
Anyway, I think you should do what you think is right. When you feel is an appropriate time, go ahead and reach out to him. Honesty and open communication solves a lot of problems.actually, I broke NC. I talked to a friend of his and then my ex and I talked. we came to the conclusion that the breakup was due to circumstance, he wants self improvement and to better his life, and isn’t ready for a relationship before he’s happy with his progress. we called on a break and says we’ll rekindle when the time is right.
What I don’t understand though, is he blocked me the first time everywhere after. And then unblocked me, called, and we talked it out. I thought things were good, but after, what I mentioned happened and then I finally just let it go, thinking that’s the right thing. I don’t understand why he’d unblock me to begin with, and why he’d feel the same away again. Those few days in between between us were really good.
Also, as for the doormat thing, I’d say perhaps he is a bit controlling, but in general things are fine between us.
Well, I wasn’t by definition unfaithful. I watched a movie with someone else, I wouldn’t call it cheating as it was purely platonic, but it made him upset regardless. He was also upset that I lied about it, since I panic lied but immediately told him the truth afterwards.
Oops, sorry. Another side post. In mentioning that he wants me to need him, would it still be wise to find a way (make another account, etc) to contact him to reassure him I care? Or do I stick to NC, and once again, I am blocked everywhere. What can I do? Please help.
Hey. I’m in a very similar situation to you and I wanted to let you know I’m sorry for how things are. I personally believe that if she wanted to be with you, she will – if she comes to the conclusion that she does miss having you in her life, and she wants to be with you, I think she will reach out. As for no contact and blocking, I want to know that myself. The most I can tell you that your chances of being unblocked as as much as she wants it to be, I think.
Ah, it seems I have forgotten to mention. I was a doormat during the relationship. When he got upset, I truly believed I was the one at fault so I would do everything to please him. Since this ended, I have been trying to regain my individuality and come to better terms with myself as a person.
When he got upset, I would always try to suck up and sweet talk him, thinking that was the right thing to do. I should’ve just given him space, in retrospect to sort out how he feels.Any advice on no contact, the advice on what to do when blocked, and how to recover from my past mistakes would be appreciated.
