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The last thing I texted her was: “I’m really hurt right now, I just really want to love you better, to take care of you much better, but I just can’t because you don’t love me anymore. I did not text anything after that. She did not respond either.
Same breakup situation but my ex immediately went for a rebound.
You should go NC for 30 days. Change a few things about yourself. Especially if they are things that helped cause the fights.
She loves you as more than a friend probably but she is emotionally blocked off. As is my ex. After NC, as long as you feel you can handle her dating and all that, go for false friendship.
Get into new things. Meet new people. Go out with friends. Try to remember what some of her issues with you were and improve on them.
Never make it about you. Shes hurting too. Trust. Intimacy starts with I but dont say Im hurting. Seems like a self absorbed statement. You said nice things after but people list things how they prioritize things. In many cases. I wouldn’t have responded with much either. It would end in a ‘who’s hurting more’ competition. Both of you are hurting.
Thanks for the response. So shall I text her and apologize? Or leave it as it is? I did not send her any message after that.
How do I know NC would still work when from the start even before the break- up she does not love me anymore?
She even talked about the future but the future would be us living separate lives. That’s what she said. Man this is really killing me.
Write her a message apologizing. That you understand where she is coming from and you will give both her and yourself space and time.
Then start NC.
She probably fell out of love, but that can be rekindled if there are attributes that she finds attractive and worth her time in the now. Throw the past out the window. It’s dead anyhow. Start from today. She isn’t in love. Show her why she should be. Fix your flaws that caused her to be out of love. That made her doubt you were the one.
So i sent her a message already. I said i was sorry and i understand why she was acting that way towards me. Then i told her to take care.
You think NC will work for me? I think it will just being her more peace than making her miss me.
She will miss you. Not at first, but soon enough.
You wrote “why you were acting that way towards me..” ??
Being blunt.. you should have worded it better.
Do you usually victimize yourself in conflict with your ex? Just curious…
I think so. I really am not sure. Maybe.
So after i sent her that text maybe after 2 hours she just responded if i wanted the brand new camera that she bought. That i can get it from her now and i can pay her next year. Not sure why she brought that up and dis not even aay anything about my apologies. Women. I really dont understand them sometimes.
Im not sure how NC could work on making someone who does not love you anymore miss you.
Am i missing some points?
I mean wont she be more happy if i would not contact her already? I mean she told me she does not love me anymore. Why would she look forward to anything that involves me?
She doesn’t look forward to anything about you as you are.
NC is proven to work in a lot of situations, but it doesn’t work for everyone. NC isn’t just about getting your ex back. It’s about improving your flaws, understanding where you went wrong, and becoming mentally and emotionally strong. If you were with your ex for a long time, she will miss you. She may not feel a relationship is right between you two but that’s why you work hard to be someone worth keeping again. People fall out of love for many different reasons: the relationship is too routine, one person in the relationship lets their appearance go to hell, bad communication, and so on.
Love is not unconditional. There were conditions in your ex’s mind when she got with you. Somewhere along the line, those conditions werent met. Her conditiobs may have even changed and thats where good communication comes in.
She told me she does not love me but barely after just 2 days of NC she was pretending she’s dying to go out and was asking me to be her companion. Even yesterday when i apologized she did not say a word about our argument and went straight right away to asking if i want the camera so i could get it from her. I’d like to see that there’s hope. But i think i need a stronger push.
My problem is i would not be able to do complete NC because after 13 days exactly we’ll be going back to work, and we’re livif under the same room. I cant move out or even shift to another room because it’s the only choice we have. It’s our sponsor’s rule. So how would i act so she would miss me when she sees me everyday?
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