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Hello, my name is James.
My (ex) girlfriend, who I’ll refer to as “C,” and I are both 14, and just started high school about a month ago. We hoped we could stay good friends like we were prior to our relationship, but things are still awkward. I was hoping that time would heal-all-wounds, and I still believe that that’s still possible. However, about 2 weeks ago, she got asked to homecoming by a senior, who I’ll refer to as “A.” This wouldn’t be a big deal, but I know he’s not a good guy. He dislikes many of her friends and yesterday I saw him kissing another girl. This bothers me because she is still some-what my friend, and he’s obviously only after one thing (hint: it’s in her pants).
C now believes that everything A says and does is pure gold, and the exact opposite for me. I make the same jokes that I always have, but she keeps giving me the cold shoulder. His sense of humor is very simplistic (moist humor?), the opposite of mine, a dry sense of humor. He’s flabbier than I am, and they have nothing in common. She texts and snapchats him every chance she gets, even in class, which she would never do for me.
So what I’m wondering is, should I say anything about what I saw? Should I distance myself from her? Should I just let her get hurt? Why is she so attracted to him? How can I make her like me more? Any answers would be much appreciated, except no clichés.if you tell her, youll just push her away further. she has to find out for herself.
I understand and agree with you. In fact, in the past two weeks my situation has gotten a lot better. C has started to act a bit nicer to me, and I’ve started to see someone else. However, another problem has arisen: as C becomes more attached to A, she has become more and more open to public displays of affection (PDA) during certain clubs and after-school activities, namely Drama Club. We practice 3 days a week for two hours per practice. At first it wasn’t so hard seeing her and him together, but now she has started kissing her all the time. And the most puzzling part is, she loves it. The most she ever let me do was hold her hand. Anyway, a great deal of my friends who are also in Drama Club hang around her in a big crowd while they goof off and crack jokes.
I suppose what I’m asking is: What should I do, join her “group,” or go find another friend to sit with? How do I deal with her PDA, while also remaining calm and collected? Remember, no clichés.she might be doing it just to hurt you. kids can be mean, hope you dont take offence to that.
your predicament is tough, as younger relationships are often a lot less rational. if you cant stand being around her, dont be. youll just do yourself harm. but if you can, hang out with her group just dont pay her anymore attention than anyone else. she has to miss the special attention you give her.
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