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Hey, So today is my ex’s birthday and im not sure what to do. WE broke up about 3 months ago and i havent talked to her in over a month and when we did talk it didnt really go well. I know she has a new boyfriend that she seems happy with from looking at her social media. I really would just like to be able to talk to her because I miss being her friend. I dont think she wants to talk though. I might just say “Happy birthday! I hope you have a great year. Im sorry that i acted a little crazy the last times we talked” Im not sure how she will react and if anyone has any suggestions on if I should say something different or nothing at all that would be much appreciated.
Thank you
I was in the same boat, my ex’s birthday fell during the nc period, i would recommend NOT to say anything, which is what i did I kept busy the whole day. i read in an article that if they kiss you the way you want them to miss you they’d reach out and have kept that in mind every time I’m tempted to talk to him.good luck!
Thanks for the advice, you are right. Im leaning towards not sending anything now. Ive been going back and forth all day. Sucks cause I really just wanna be her friend and know what shes been up to and how her family and all are doing
I understand how you must be sad. Breakups are never easy for anyone.
It’s best not to send a happy birthday, but if you feel compelled to do it, keep the comments very short and DO NOT say anything about being friends! The apology and wish for a great year is enough. As long as she has a boyfriend, it’s not a good idea to try to be her friend as the other guy might get jealous and it will cause unnecessary drama. Try not to stalk social media, it will just make you sadder.
God Bless and I pray you have the strength to move on the best you can..
Thank you for the support. I really appreciate it. It feels like I have no one sometimes. But I don’t think I will send the birthday wish even though I really want to. I just feel bad not sending one even though I shouldn’t. I also try not to look at her social media. I only do it every couple weeks to see if she is still with the new guy. Ive been doing pretty good but today’s just been a bad day
Surely you have family and some friends to spend time with. Don’t unload your sadness on them too much, but enjoy some fun times together. Please believe time will heal your wounds..
You sound like a nice guy and I wish you the best of everything:)Yeah you’re right. Family and friends have helped but I’m not one to let my feelings out too much. I still have hope that I will be able to talk to my ex one day. I’m also trying to find someone new but it’s tough. Thank you for the kind words!
Ok so I stupidly didn’t listen to your advice and texted my ex today. I figured what did I have to loose.
I asked her how she was doing and then I said I was sorry for how I acted before. She said i needed to move on and I said I have (which I have some not completely) and she said I obviously haven’t because I texted her. I said I was just curious how she was doing because I care about how she’s doing and understand if she didn’t wanna talk.
Then the worse thing happened. Out of no where she blew up on me kinda. Im summarizing but she basically said I needed to move on. Shes really happy now with her relationship and she thinks it’s f***Ed up to text an ex while she’s in a relationship. And it’s disrespectful to him. And she shows screenshots of every text I send her to her boyfriend. And she’s fed up with it. She said she didn’t mean to be mean but she needed to get her point across and that she told me a thousand times she didn’t want to talk but I didn’t listen.
First of all I only texted her two or three times since we broke up and not at all in two months so idk where she got the thousand times from. And I didn’t really want to get back together. I wanted to be her friend
I just replied saying something like that I get it and didn’t know you felt this way. I didn’t mean any disrespect to your boyfriend and really just wanted to talk as friends. I kinda feel humiliated now and am sorry for everything.
She just replied saying she didn’t want any comtact. I feel like she over reacted but I guess it’s probably better in the long run cause now I know I gotta move on and have no shot at being able to talk to her again
I’m not sure why I didn’t listen to your advice in the first place
@steeld8 – She is right; it’s not appropriate to contact an ex while she’s in another relationship! She doesn’t want to be your friend and she wants you to move on. So now you know for sure that the best thing you can do is put the past behind you and move on. I’m sorry because I know you were holding out hope things could be different, but facts are facts. It will take a little time to heal, but you will be okay in the long run. Think back as to the reasons she broke up with you and make any improvements you think are necessary in order to have a better relationship with someone else in the future. When you’re ready, start dating again. Good luck.
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