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Maybe you the next time you see him, tell him that you’re sorry and that was very inappropriate (not that it was, but for your actions of being quiet and stuff you could say it like that instead of going into detail). I feel like a lot of things that your friend said was about how she read his body language and how he talked, so I can’t make a good judgement call on that. However, the fact that he let you come over is a sign. He would’ve avoided the situation if he wasn’t in some form invested into wanting you to come into. The way he’s dressed, if he knows you like it that way, then I feel he is interested because he wouldn’t just dress like that for nothing. It was for you. I think he fell asleep. I don’t see him ignoring you whatsoever. Also, the fact that he did work 4 doubles and was exhausted but still stayed up for you to come over is a good sign. I do think there are still a lot of feelings involved. But I don’t know when he will decide to act on them. I kind of feel like he wants you to act on them, but I don’t want to be wrong and suggest you to do so! So don’t do anything yet!
He just finally texted me back, saying he’s up. And then followed it up asking if it’s too late and saying he’s sorry if it is. And it is, unfortunately. But I might tell him he could make them for me tomorrow or after work or something. I know a lot of what she said was based off body language and seeing him, and I know I’m missing these signs because I’m in the middle of it. I feel like he’s really waiting on me, it just doesn’t feel like my job, and I don’t want to do something wrong.
I completely understand! When you guys have your alone time together, be a little flirtatious and see where that takes you!
You could mention that to him too! About the whole eggs thing! He seems fine with doing so!Wait, mention what? Sorry if I’m being totally dense. Just want to make sure I’m understanding what you’re saying.
I told him I had to be in early unfortunately and we should rain check for tomorrow morning for the eggs and stick to watching our TV show today. He said that sounded good. I’m going to just tell him I’ll talk to him after work and then leave it for the time being.
I meant mention the eggs thing! I think you should go a long with things for now and come in a little closet at points!
That’s what I’m hopefully trying to do. I’m going to get back to him about watching our show tonight (I laugh because I technically already watched it but it’s a PERFECT episode for us to see together, can’t even describe it), be really receptive to anything he wants to talk about or do tonight, hopefully he’ll invite me to stay, and if he doesn’t, then the ball is in his court. Even about the eggs. Monday through Friday we technically have no plans and don’t have to see each other so this will be a real test of my ability to self-soothe and cope and a test of how much he’s willing to initiate.
Agreed! You should do everything you may said! You’re on the right path to success!
My friend suggested maybe offering to pick up take out or something before coming over? I’m not sure if that looks desperate or too accommodating though. Any thoughts? I guess I’m just wondering if it seems like there’s any hope of a full on reconciliation.
Your post really made me laugh! Lol xD
It seems like you were having fun together and there is definitely something more there! The way he dressed, talked and responded make it seems like he’s interested in something more with you. Even though he was exhausted he was willing to hang out with you! I think that sometimes it’s good to have this friend who helps you by taking your phone and initiating instead of you, you can examine his behavior this way when there are other people around except you two and see his reactions. I think that if your friend noticed that she might be right but I can’t be sure about that because you have to see his body language and his way of talking. I think you can ask him about watching the show together, and even try to be a bit flirty. But I still think it has to come from him. You don’t want to make the situation awkward between you two that’s why I think you should take it slow and try to see his intentions. Keep doing what you’re doing because I think you are on the right path as well!I made it home from work, I texted him, we have solid plans. He’s playing tennis with his friend at six (in a half an hour, for all those not on the west coast of the United States), then we’re going to meet up to watch our show and he’s going to make us dinner.
After last night, and his responses today, I’m trying to work more about being optimistic. When it comes right down to it, I just honestly don’t know why he would’ve communicated with me last night, offered to designated drive, let me come over at two a.m. when he was exhausted, tried to make plans for this morning, made back up plans when that didn’t work out, etc. if he weren’t at least somewhat reconsidering or thinking about the mistakes he made. I’m trying not to be overly optimistic, but this at least makes me feel more like he cares about me and is actually thinking about what happened.
That being said, I think the best thing I can do for both of us right now is to NOT talk about the relationship. I don’t think it’s something to avoid or not talk about indefinitely. But I think that if he can get used to this routine and feeling the way he does about me at the same time, this could be salvageable. He just needs a little reminding that he can have me and his independence at the same time, and he does need to come to that conclusion on his own. Me repeatedly trying to bring it up or pressuring him for answers does nothing. Granted, I’m not going to wait forever. That would be stupid and we wouldn’t get anywhere. But this does feel like it’s headed in a good direction and I need to just let that negativity or those issues lie for now.
I agree with you fully! I think you should just enjoy it where it is at as long as it is meeting your needs and expectations!
Everything is honestly fine and dandy with me as long as he isn’t with other girls. The rest of the small things that bug me can be worked out or gotten over in the meantime until we actually do talk about the relationship. And from the fact he went out of his way to let me know he hadn’t been hanging out with other girls, I feel like he’s not looking for anyone else in the meantime.
I think you are thinking in the right direction 🙂 there is no doubt in my mind that you are doing the right thing!!
Haha I’m really trying to! I’m just so nervous about tonight. I want to act like myself around him, be happy, be unafraid to initiate things or hug him or kiss him or what not. But I’m just so terrified that him not outright saying he wants these things means he doesn’t. I guess I’m just afraid to get shut down. That being said, I’m trying to breathe and not let that rule me 🙂
How are you doing? Any updates?
Just judge how he acts around you! He may let off some hints that way and that might also give you a door to act yourself around him after all. It’s good though that you’re not going to let your fear of getting shut down control you because it seems already like you’re going to have a good time tonight. I really hope for the best for you
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