suggestions for my ultimate last resort

hi

thanks to this site

this is my situation,she decided 2months and a half ago to “recenter herself” and go to her grand parents house with her father as she said. As a closer.

i came back to france for her as i was in the caribean and i knew that i was going to fuck up my studies

After putting up with my pressured situation, no job, no sleep for exams, sleeping at her parents house for 12 days arriving from the caribbean for her, as she was totally set in life and left me at a youth hotel. “she said she still wanted to come visit my new appartement when i had it, and wanted the deep conversations we had”

“i am a great lover and can give crazy experiences”

i accepted it but got neede and ran after her without pushing to much but still went to far on some boundaries “stressed out for sleeping outside and her just ignoring it, for me not having money, for me looking for a job relentlessly and loosing it relentlessly because of lack of experience in the jobs i tryed out” and she closed in emotionally to me because of chassing.

did partial no contact for 15 days because was seing her 2 times a week at thai boxing, left the thai boxing club 15 days ago, she was totally pissed probably because i was annoying “using mind tricks to get her” then told her “i need time ” and was not interested in being friends with her but was interested in being her “life parter” ,she said “take as much time as you need” her anger was starting to leave because just befor i left the sports club, 15 days ago, “I had to leave the sports club because of financial issues”, our conversations where not very beautiful “she was flirting with this guy and was pushing my buttons” because she was clouded with a barior, i’ve been working on myself these 2 months got a job but just got fired, an appartement,

Got her to have ‘that look’ of emotional openess again and blurring eyes of bliss the day befor i left the boxing club when refered our trip in the caribean.

i still have some feallings for my ex of stupid loss and potentially being the girl i want to be with “we almost had a kid” but have not said a word to her for 15 days to follow no contact.

got back to my hobby ‘pick up artist’ i am preatty good at interraction, projecting masculinity, and being witty in conversation. “im on a date”

every day forgetting her more but i want her and think after all we have been trew its stupid to dump it all, we where very intimate and the dynamic of our relationship was perfect, it could not have been more polarising, intimate, and pure bliss, as my style of seduction is very over the edges, till i got in profesional difficulties, tought i could have confidence in her till it gets sorted and bounce back to a hard core romantic relationship.

i can find her at a salsa class, i know when and how and i really want to start salsa again but i know the timing must be perfect at the point where i can see her over there flirting with other guys without me flinching a second, see her with a new boyfriend without flinching and think i need a bit more time, what are your advices on :

the best strategie to start back a conversation a connection without her putting up to much gards to bypass her logical part.

the best timming when to know i am ready to take up the challenge.

every day its a fight to better myself in pick up skills, job wise, friend wise, can’t do sports but i am still putting some time to eat good and keep some muscle going as im preatty lean. all day everyday i push myself to exausting feallings to make up the work to survive and become better persone for me for my chances with her and for my own personality, till i adventually fall to depression because i’m out of energy and still pushing, till my mind goes crazy and i feal disgusted and unable to move an inch.

these are some of her words that closed lots of my openess in interacting whit her “will never be togheter ever” ” i can’t say i love you” as our relationship was very romantic and over all the most emotive thing ever that went trew my eyes.

then she started to get angry as i closed in and said : “you did not leave me with much reminders of you” “you tought that i was a taxi for you thats all”

my replies : “i need time” “narcisticaly looking at her” “looking in her eyes” “and listenning to her”

she said she was 25 and did not have much time

i replied always arguing the facts and leaving.

yours truly

what are your suggestions, advices and things i should do to save the most pationnate thing that whent trew my eyes.

this girl traveled for me did everything for me with 100% comitment till i could not balance the relationship because of difficulties.

Jeremie Rasumny Cohen